Life as it was planned?
by PrincessLille
Summary: Rick and Kate are deeply in love but their honeymoon phase can't take forever. Eventually they'll get to the daily routine, they have to face problems in their relationship and realize, life can't be planned. How will they manage spending less time alone with each other? What if Alexis gets into trouble? Will they tell each other everything or will they go back to having secrets?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: So after a very long time not writing anything I thought it would be nice to try out a Castle fanfiction. I'd like to know your thoughts on this one and hope you'll like it ;)**

**Disclaimer: as you probably all know, Castle belongs not to me... **

**Have fun reading :D**

It was dark in the room but still, she could feel his gaze on her. Lying next to the man she loved made her feel complete, a feeling she hadn't had for so long. His breath was warm on her skin as she longed for his touch. The feeling was so overwhelming, she had never desired a man that much before.

When he then touched her neck pure lust awoke inside of her, she wanted him badly but however he had a different plan. In deliciously slow pace his hand went down to her tights causing her to squirm in anticipation of what he would do to her body. The tension became more than she could bear and she knew if he would tease her any longer she would go insane.

But suddenly they were interrupted by a loud beeping next to her head and her eyes flung open. Turning her head sideways to the spot beside her in bed she felt lonely, he wasn't there. She'd just dreamed it but it had felt incredibly real. Why wasn't he here? Right they had been supposed to have the previous evening all to themselves, finally some alone time since what felt like ages. But then Alexis had called crying hysterically and she'd told Castle to take care of his daughter and assured him she'd be fine, which she was but still she couldn't keep herself from feeling frustrated.

With a groan she turned around grabbing her phone from the night table and looked at the caller ID. 12th precinct - of course, who else would disturb her at 5 am?

"Beckett." she answered it sitting up in bed.

"Hey, we've got a dead body." the familiar voice of Esposito greeted her.

"Where?" she asked getting out of bed and walking toward her closet. A slight smile appeared on her face as she remembered her first day back at work after suspension and how she'd changed her top several times so none of the detectives would find out about them. No matter which top she'd put on Castle had told her she looked sexy just so she would change again and he could see her topless once more.

"An empty warehouse on Grand Street." he told her.

"Okay, I'm on my way." and with that she hung up

* * *

When Beckett walked into the warehouse she took in the scene that was in front of her. Lanie was bending over the body on the opposite side of the room while Esposito and Ryan stood next to her talking. But what was most important to her was the fact that her eyes couldn't find Castle, why wasn't he here? Did that mean something serious had happened to Alexis? She hoped not because that would only lead to Beckett feeling even more bad than she already did.

She'd been so frustrated about Alexis calling because spending an evening all alone with her beloved boyfriend had been more than necessary, after all they'd spend most of the time surrounded either by Esposito and Ryan at work or by Martha and Alexis. Wasn't it understandable that she wanted some time alone with him? But of course Alexis had to call right at that evening and destroy all their plans.

Beckett felt bad for thinking like that because she knew Alexis would always come in first place for him and actually she wouldn't want to have it any other way, but still she was frustrated and apparently slowly going insane. So it probably was better that Castle wasn't there because after the dream she just had it might have been a little too hard for her to concentrate on her work. Trying her best to push away any thoughts concerning her private live she walked over to Esposito and Ryan, who was looking a little confused.

"Where's Castle?" he immediately asked, knowing about the cozy evening they had planned for yesterday. Castle just couldn't keep his mouth shut and had to tell everyone out of his happiness that yesterday evening was just for the two of them.

"Didn't you guys call him too?" she was surprised, usually one of them would also call him.

"Ehhr... We thought he was with you..." he looked somehow unsure of what to say to Esposito and then back to Beckett.

"Well he's not!" that came out a little too bugged, causing Ryan and Esposito to exchange knowing glances, which she chose to ignore just like Esposito's comment "Trouble in paradise...".

"So what do we have here?" she stepped closer to Lanie.

"A young male, who I guess is in his mid-twenties. At first glance it seems as if he was stabbed to death but I might be able to tell you more once I've examined him more closely in the morgue..." Lanie gave her friend a concerned look, sensing that something wasn't alright but not wanting to push her into telling it.

"A woman called the police about 4 am but when we arrived there was no one here. She was gone." Esposito added.

"Maybe you should call Castle now, I'm sure he wouldn't want to miss out on this one..." she said turning to Esposito and Ryan, who both were looking at her sceptical. But she had made her decision, they should call him this way she would know for sure if something serious happened to Alexis the other night and she wouldn't be the crazy nosey little girlfriend because Ryan would call him.

"You're sure?" Ryan asked concerned.

"Oh come on guys, everything's fine with me and Castle, he just had to leave yesterday because Alexis needed him." she clarified rolling her eyes smiling about how much they all seemed to care for her.

"Mhh... Okay so I'll call him."Ryan told them walking out of the building while Esposito went on informing Beckett about everything they already knew.

"We don't know who he is yet because he has nothing with him that might give away his identity, but it looks like he fought his killer, there are blood traces all over this place..."

"Good and did you already find something indicating who the perp might be?" she asked looking down at the body. The victim had short blonde hair that at some spots was now red from his blood he lay in. Wearing jeans and sneakers he looked pretty young, maybe he was a student or something, she thought, he definitely didn't look like he was into anything illegal but out of experience Beckett knew that didn't mean he really wasn't.

"No, but I'm going to see if I find anything..." Espo said turning around to start searching, leaving the two women alone with the dead body.

"You're really okay?" Lanie asked once they were alone.

"Yes... It's just I really needed this time with him, you know only the two of us without anyone interrupting. It's been so long... But Alexis had to call crying and yes I know he had to leave and actually I also told him to do so but still... It's been so long..." actually Beckett hadn't planned on pouring out her heart to her friend like that but somehow there were so many things not going as she'd planned so who cares. She almost whined desperately and felt the frustration rising once more

"Oh I see, you're in desperate need of some Castle action..." her friend gave her a knowing smile.

"I don't..." she started but was silenced by Lanie.

"Yes you are sweety, it's written all over your face." she told her walking away leaving a shocked Beckett standing there alone. Was it that obvious? Did everybody noticed it? Who was she trying to kid, she was surrounded by detectives, of course they would notice. God this couldn't get more embarrassing.

Before she could get even more embarrass Esposito returned holding a beverage can in his hand. "I found this, it might belong to our victim... Or probably our killer..." he told her when Ryan came back in.

"Did you get hold of him?" she asked hopefully turning towards him.

"Yes, he's coming and..." he seemed to be unsure how to tell her something else.

"And?" she asked when he didn't went on talking.

"He told me to tell you that he's really sorry for last night." he blurted out.

"Dude, he really let you apologize in his name?" Esposito cut in not believing what he'd just heard.

"Well... Yes..."Ryan had known he would react like that.

"He is such a coward, no offence Beckett, but your boyfriend has no balls." he clarified somewhat angrily.

"None taken." Beckett couldn't hide a slight smile, she thought it as cute how Esposito always tried to act like he was her older brother and somehow she had to agree with him, which man doesn't apologize personally? But to be honest she didn't expected anything else from him, he was Castle, he did things and said things without thinking about how it seemed to other people. Not a single day passed without him being in an awkward situation due to his first speaking then thinking attitude and actually that was part of his charm. She loved him for it and even if it sometimes made her go mad, because it could be pretty annoying, she would miss it if he would change.

The three of them were about to focus on the crime again when Castle walked into the warehouse holing a cup of coffee in each hand as he always does. The smile on his face let Beckett's heart start to melt, he was gorgeous. She eyed him and wondered if his jeans had always been that tight and shown off his muscular legs like that. He was hot and he was her boyfriend, he belonged to her.

"Hey guys so who was murdered?" he asked a little too cheerfully considering a young man had lost his life. Beckett was startling and noticed that she must had stared at him, had anyone noticed? Or most importantly had he noticed? Castle couldn't know about her being distracted by his presence, if he did it would only lead to an incredibly embarrassing conversation, well at least it would be for her.

"We don't know his name yet but he was a fighter, tried to escape his killer." Esposito explained while Beckett was still preoccupied with not staring.

"Seems not successfully..." Castle commented.

"Really Castle? What a subtle conclusion." she said curtly as she faced the body on the ground but couldn't hide a smirk, she loved him for comments like that.

"Ryan and I will try to find out if there were any witnesses." Esposito seemed to sense that Beckett and Castle probably should be left alone to talk and so he pulled his bro away to hopefully get on with the case.

"So I've heard you're sorry..." she was still looking at the body avoiding any eye contact so she wouldn't be tempted to stare again at her handsome boyfriend but in her voice was a little hint of hurt hearable.

"Yes I am... Turned out Alexis had just some boy trouble..." he didn't noticed anything.

"Oh what happened?" she tried her best to sound rather casually.

"Well, she'd met this guy some time ago and she apparently was really into him and he into her but because of college and friends they didn't really got the chance to have some time just for the two of them and that's why she was crying..." he explained not noticing the irony. Why didn't he notice the parallels to his and Beckett's relationship? Was it just clearly visible to her because she was full of frustration just like Alexis was?

"So what did you tell her?" "That she doesn't want to be alone with that guy, guys that age have nothing good in mind when being alone with a girl, believe me I must know, I've been there..." he nodded at her to underline his point but stopped when she turned towards him raising an eyebrow.

"Actually that didn't come out right..." he added pensively.

"You think?!" she was bugged and now finally he noticed it too. Apparently he had done something wrong and pissed her off, but he couldn't lie his finger on what exactly it was.

"Are you mad at me? Because you know I wanted to come back to your place but it was already late and I thought you might already be asleep... And oh here I've brought you some coffee." he tried to explain himself handing her the cup.

"Thanks and no Castle I'm not mad at you. There was no way I would have let you stay with me when Alexis called last night." she gave him a reassuringly smile.

"What is it then? You act so differently..." he looked so clueless as he stood right in front of her.

"Nothing." she turned around again so she was facing the victim. Looking at Castle was just too distracting, he looked so good in his tight blue jeans. She tried her best to stay calm but she could feel his eyes on her and couldn't resist looking him again. He looked at her from head to toe causing her to absentmindedly start biting her lip. She felt heat rising inside her, knowing he was checking out her body made her feel desireable. She could almost feel his hand touching her gently, pulling her in for a long slow passionate kiss. God his lips, had they always been this full and kissable? She knew she slowly drifted into dreaming again and she actually didn't want to stop herself but a small part inside her was yelling at her to focus and stop staring again.

"Oh I see, you're hot for me... Am I right?" he interrupted her thoughts, his voice barely more than a whisper. Astonishment was all over his face and caused Beckett to blush slightly as she turned away to escape his gaze.

"Oh shut up!" she tried to hide her embarrassment.

"Ha I knew it, you can't stand my good looking..." he exclaimed loudly.

"Could you please keep your voice down?" she whispered turning around shocked by his outburst.

"Oh of course, I'm sorry... But you totally are..." he grinned like a 12-year old.

"No Castle I am not!" she rolled her eyes walking away to avoid the embarrassing conversation he was about to start. Now it was necessary to focus on finding the killer of that poor boy, there was no room for her personal problems and she was kind of happy about that.

She told Esposito and Ryan to ask around whether anyone had seen anything, while she and Castle would be at the precinct trying to find out something about the victim's identity. Unfortunately she hadn't thought about the ride to the precinct, she would have to drive together with him only a few inches separating her from his body. There would be no chance for her to avoid the conversation she knew would be started by him as soon as the car started to move. Well that was going to be interesting and of course embarrassing.

**Please let me know your thoughts. **


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thank you so much for the Follows and Faves, I get you liked the first chapter? And a special thanks to AnnaFIRTH for taking the time to review :) So now have fun with chapter 2 ;)**

**Disclaimer: Castle still doesn't belong to me... unfortunately :p **

As they got into the car she could feel his gaze on her again, sitting so close to the man she desired and yet wasn't able to touch him the way she'd liked to was driving her insane. But at the same moment she also felt totally embarrassed, what had she been thinking to just stare at him like a lovesick teenager? She should have controlled herself because then she wouldn't be in this situation, stuck in a car with her boyfriend who was clearly amused by her state of mind.

He wouldn't let it go, he would want to talk about it and there was nowhere in this damn car she could hide. Had there ever been more tension between the two of them than right now? She doubted it but that didn't mean anything, in the building she'd also doubted that the tension could rise and yet here she was sitting only a few inches away from him, even more tension between them than before. After she'd driven about two blocks she finally couldn't bear it any longer.

"Okay Castle, you were right." she admitted.

"I'm always right when it comes to you, I know you Kate." he grinned from ear to ear.

"I might be a little out of my usual self today..." that described it, right? After all it was the truth, normally she was this focused cop that knew exactly how to separate her private life from her work, but today it didn't seem to be able to handle it.

"Oh you're not only a little out of yourself, you're totally turned on by me." he got to the heart of it. Why the hell did he know her so damn well?

"Oh come on Castle that's not true!" there was no other option for her than to deny it, otherwise this would end quite embarrassing for her.

"Yes it is." he said, completely sure about it.

"Don't you think I would know if I was?" she couldn't even bring herself to give him a quick glance because most likely it would end in her admiring him and not noticing that she was already staring again.

"I didn't say you don't know... you do know it, you just don't want to admit it..."he hit the mark, seemed like he knew her really well.

"Oh and what makes you think that?" she didn't want to believe that he actually could read her that well.

"You avoid looking at me." he said matter of factly.

"Casle I can look at you, it's just much saver to watch the traffic when you're driving." she told him thinking that this was a really good excuse.

"Fine so do it, proof me wrong!" he challenged her, knowing damn well that she wouldn't want to miss a chance to do so.

"Fine!" she turned her head sideways to look at him, in pleasant anticipation of his fading grin once she'd showed him how wrong he was.

Unfortunately for her she couldn't proof him wrong, he was just too handsome to not get distracted by his good-looking. She was in awe, never in her life she'd thought a man that attractive would be interested in her. Of course there had been some other men that, to be honest, hadn't been bad-looking either but Castle was different, he was the man she'd always dreamed of.

Although she'd never imagined it when they first met he was the one she'd searched for, even though he was the most annoying person she knew and probably would never completely grow up, he was the man that made her complete and loved her unconditionally. Richard Castle, the man she could picture herself growing old with. And he was so incredibly sexy, there was no way she could resist him, it was inevitable that she started fantasizing again.

Almost feeling his warm breath on her skin she thought about his hands touching her, pulling her closer so his lips could find hers for a passionate kiss. Her breathing quickened and she forgot everything around her, there were just the two of them.

"See I was right." he suddenly interrupted her dream grinning widely.

"What? Didn't I just look at you?" she turned her head as quick as possible, what the hell was she thinking to get lost again? God, now she just had stop, stay calm and act normal, maybe then he would let go of the topic but who was she trying to kid? It was Castle, she should know that he would never just drop this, however she could still hope.

"Oh yes, you looked at me..." in his voice was something indicating that he had seen the look on her face and that he was pretty sure what had been going on in her head.

"Then what?" she tried her best to keep cool but gave away how embarrassed she was again by blushing.

How had she been able to resist him for four years? She couldn't remember it being this hard before, so why for god's sake couldn't they just go on working next to each other as they'd done it before they got together? Okay she had to admit during those four years it also had cost her much self-discipline to not fall for his charms but it hadn't been impossible. So why was it like this now? Oh right she knew why, she'd slept with him, she knew now how good it felt to be with him in every possible way and of course that had made it even harder to resist him.

"Oh come on Kate you were looking at me as if you'd jump me right here in this car!" Castle laughed slightly at her attempt to hide her embarrassment.

So obviously her hoping he would let it go wasn't successful, what for god's sake was she supposed to do now? She just had to face it, he could read her like no one else could and as the previous attempts had shown denying was in vain. What else was there for her to do, she should just talk to him and explain everything, so she pulled over the car to stop.

"Woah you really want to do it right here?" he looked at her stunned and somewhat shocked.

"No Castle, I just want you to drop it. Okay I admit I am a little distracted by you today but I'm a cop, I've got work to do..." she explained a little shocked that he would actually think she'd want him in her car, on the street where everyone could see them.

"Oh... Okay..." somehow he seemed to be a little bit disappointed and was about to start pouting.

"But who says we can't try out the car some other time..." she told him biting her lip and looking pretty salaciously, which let the huge smile from one ear to the other appear on his face again. He was cheerfully looking forward to it but they had to solve a murder first.

* * *

To identify the victim by finding out what the building had been used for turned out to be rather difficult. The warehouse had been used by several companies over the years but by now was disused for about 2 years and would soon be knocked down. Beckett had buried herself in finding out everything about the use of the bulding and with that successfully distracted herself from the handsome man she could call her boyfriend.

fortunately Castle had given her some space to work without him sitting right next to her and busied himself with also finding out something about the victim's identity, but still neither him nor she were a step closer to finding out who the dead body was. And now there wasn't only the frustration from last night she felt but also the frustration from not being able to move forward with the case. What could she do now to distract her from all the frustration she felt, especially the frustration because of last night?

"God this whole thing leads nowhere..." she exclaimed desperately.

"Maybe we should take a break... See if we can get a new point of view afterwards..."Castle said laying a hand on her shoulder squeezing it softly. She hadn't noticed him standing right behind her until now and stiffened at his touch. This wasn't going to end well, all day long she'd avoided direct contact with him knowing fully well that she couldn't stand it after her dream this morning. And now there he was, softly touching her shoulder. Even such a harmless little gesture could make her forget everything. Immediately she felt the urge to nestle up against him, to just lay in his arms and breath in his scent.

"Kate? Are you okay?" he asked concerned feeling her stiffen under his touch.

"Mmhhmm." she just said in a high-pitched voice, not able to form a single word. She had to remember herself to breath and to remind her of how inappropriate it would be to get lost in her fantasy about him while she actually should work on the case.

"Seriously? I can't even touch your shoulder?" he couldn't believe it but had a huge smirk on his face.

"I know, it's so embarrassing..." she almost whined, trying to hide her face behind her hands, completely embarrassed.

"Actually I think it's kind of sweet..."

"What's sweet about me being distracted by even the slightest touch of yours? I'm a cop... I have to focuse on my work..."

"It means you're effected by my presence, I turn you on... And believe me, I've never thought I'd be able to do that while you're working..." he explained almost whispering to make sure no one around them could hear it.

"I'm totally going crazy here..." she still couldn't bring herself to look Castle in the face. How embarrassing this was for her, the tough cop that knew always how to focus on the important things. The only thing that would be worse was if Castle even got to know that she'd had a really salacious dream centered around him.

"You know there's something I could do about that..." he walked around the chair she sat on to face her, his voice trailing off as he tried to look as sheepishly as possible.

Looking him in the eyes Beckett found herself biting her lip. That was a very tantalizing offer and she couldn't stop herself from thinking about it. She was longing for his hands to touch her, first to caress her cheek and then making their way downwards to her waist pulling her against his chest. Imagining to feel his heartbeat she closed her eyes smiling lightly and taking a deep breath. He smelled so incredibly good, like a god.

"Are... Are you fantasizing about me?" Castle interrupted her dream somewhat stunned but still with obvious amusement.

Her eyes flew open and she was back sitting in the office surrounded by several detectives. She looked straight into the blue eyes that belonged to her boyfriend and felt caught. Immediately she looked around checking whether anyone else had seen her getting lost but fortunately no one had taken notice.

She knew Castle was waiting for an answer but she couldn't form proper words, the only thing she was able to do was looking him deep in the eyes still biting her lip. But he didn't need an answer, he knew she'd done it and it was hot. Words weren't necessary at that moment, they looked each other in the eyes and knew they felt the same way. Was there a good hiding place in here where the two of them could be alone to satisfy their need for each other?

"Hey we've got something." Ryan came in followed by Esposito, they really knew how to ruin a moment. Castle and Beckett literally jumped apart like two teenagers who were secretly in love and who'd been caught by their parents.

"So what do you have?" she tried to distract them from her unprofessional behaviour but couldn't stop looking at Castle out of the corner of her eye. He sat there with closed eyes, his face giving away the frustration he felt. _Suck it up_ she thought, _that's what I've got to deal with the whole day._

"An old woman saw the victim go into the warehouse several times before and apparently he met someone there..." Esposito told her clearly not caring about Beckett's embarrassment.

"Maybe his killer..." she was again preoccupied with the case but could feel Castle's look on her, his eyes were literally glued to her while he didn't manage to say a word.

"More likely the woman who informed the police... Apparently he met with a young woman at least once a week there." Esposito went on.

"At night?" Castle finally found his voice again unglueing his eyes from Beckett.

"Usually pretty early in the morning..." Ryan cut in not hiding the smirk on his face. He seemed to be quite amused by their little dace of hiding their relationship.

"And today she came early to find his dead body..." Castle thought loudly.

"Was the old lady able to describe her?" Beckett asked hoping to finally get something to start with.

"Even better, she took a photo of her."Esposito smiled triumphantly holding up a sheet of paper

"What? Why would she take a photo?" Castle exclaimed shocked and in a high pitched voice.

"Actually she didn't want to take one of the girl but of the graffiti on the walls." Esposito clarified looking at Beckett.

"One of those bored old women that feel the need to serve the society by helping to catch teenagers that scrawl the walls..." added Ryan matter of factly.

"And when she was about to do so the door flung open and the girl walked out." his bro went on explaining.

Beckett grabbed the picture from him looking at it closely. The girl she saw seemed to be around 20 with medium length brown hair, which was a little messy. The clothes she wore had to have cost a lot of money, they looked like some designer clothes not everyone could afford. What did the victim have to do with a girl this wealthy?

"Looks like our guy had a thing for girls far out of his league..." Castle said looking over his girlfriend's shoulder. He'd immediately noticed the contrast between the girl's appearance and the surroundings on the photo. She was clearly out of place, just like some rich, spoiled little daughter of some business person.

"Do we know who she is?" she asked still thinking about how the victim could be connected to a girl of the higher society. He might have blackmailed her, she thought, but with what?

"No we don't..." Ryan told her bitterly. They were still at the same point they were hours ago at the warehouse and there was nothing indicating a progress in finding the murderer rather soon. This was so frustrating, every little trace they found led nowhere.

**I would definitely like to know what you're thinking, so please leave a review ;)**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N So I've got the feeling that there aren't many people reading this and although I really appreciate the last reviews it's kind of hard finding the motivation to write... so if there aren't only two or three people reading this story I would like to know. Tell me what you liked and disliked about the chapter or what you would like to see coming up in following chapters... I appreciate every kind of review! But now enjoy reading :)**

They were sitting at a table in a café near the precinct. Castle had finally managed to convince her that a little coffee break might be a good idea to get their heads clear but when she'd walked toward the break room to get a cup of coffee he'd taken her hand with the words "We'll go to the little café down the street." a slight grin playing around his lips. She hadn't gotten why he wanted to leave the precinct but now that she sat across of him in this café she knew what had been on his mind. He wanted to be alone with her to talk, talk about the previous evening, talk about what was going on with her.

"Look, I know you want to talk about what just happened in the precinct..." she said when he just sat there looking at her saying not a single word.

"Not if you don't want to..." he shook his head a little bit and smiled at her understandingly.

She hadn't expected that, where was his curiosity of before? He had had so much fun seeing how embarrassing this topic was for her and now he just let go of it? Maybe he finally started to grow up, wouldn't that be great? Well actually she really didn't know whether that would be good thing, somehow she had to admit she was fond of his child-like side and it's also part of his charm.

"You know I don't want you to feel embarrass again..." he went on a huge grin appearing on his face.

There was the man-child again, he just couldn't stop making fun of her desperate situation. So he was definitely not growing up, which in some way let a slight smile appear on her face.

"That's not funny Castle!" she couldn't stop her smile from getting wider and wider, definitely not good when trying to emphasize her point.

"Why detective Beckett you are smiling widely." he said his eyes shining with amusement. What was she going to reply on that? He had a point there, she was smiling like some idiot but before she could think more about what to reply her cell started buzzing. Lanie had texted her to come into the morgue as soon as possible because she found something. Thank god, this way Beckett could avoid again talking seriously about this.

"We need to get to the morgue, Lanie got something." she informed him standing up and walking towards the door with a relieved smile on her face. Castle though seemed to be a little disappointed that she got away without talking again but he wouldn't give up, by the end of the day he would get her to tell him why she was so distracted.

* * *

As they walked into the room Lanie awaited them already.

"What did you find out?" Beckett asked immediately.

"Our victim here got a name now, Daniel Morrison. And what's interesting is the fact that he wasn't stabbed to death." the ME started to explain.

"He wasn't?" she asked puzzled.

"No the wounds in his chest aren't nearly deep enough to do any serious damage, he was tortured before he died." Lanie eyed the body with sympathy.

"That indicates a personal motif..." Castle mentioned.

"Then what's the cause of death?" Beckett was curious, she hadn't expected this case to turn out everything else than a common murder. It would have been much easier that way, she could literally solve a murder without big effort, well at least when she wasn't distracted by a certain man. And of course now that she was busy with trying not to fantasize about him she got a complex murder case, which required her full attention.

"His lungs are full of water..." Lanie stated matter of factly, knowing that this would sound incredibly strange considering he'd been found in a warehouse in the middle of New York, where no lake or sea was.

"He drowned?" Castle and Beckett exclaimed as out of one mouth, both looking stunned at Lanie as she nodded as a reply. So now that one problem was solved, they knew now who the victim was, another one occurred. How the hell could he had drowned in a warehouse?

"Oh I Know. Teleportation! He was drowning in the sea and to save himself he used his skills to get here only was it too late and he died." the 12-year old little boy came to the surface again and as if it was the most logical thing on earth he explained his theory.

"Castle you've seen too many science-fiction movies, teleportation doesn't exist. Besides we found his blood in the warehouse, he was tortured there." Beckett told him trying her best to hide a grin.

She'd always wondered where his vivid imagination came from and how he could actually believe in his sometimes absurd theories. His imagination often ran wild but she loved it, it was so much fun to hear him getting all those ideas, that would make a hell of a hollywood movie.

She found his imagination awe-inspiring, how he could make up the most thrilling crimes in his books, let alone the passionate love scenes he'd imagined the both of them having, love scenes everyone could read about in his Nikki Heat books. No, she had to stop she couldn't go there again she felt herself getting lost again in the idea of feeling his touch on her skin, feeling him trailing down kisses her neck and gently making love to her.

"You don't know if it doesn't exist, maybe some crazy scientists found out how it works without telling the whole world about it. And the killer could have tortured him in the warehouse and later thrown him into the sea." he argued thinking that his theory was the best he'd ever had and bringing Beckett back into reality.

"Well Castle let's just stick to what we have, in this case the identity of the victim. I'll call Ryan and Esposito to find out where this guy lives. Maybe his apartment will give us a hint on the reasons he's been killed..." she already had her cell ready to call them when she turned around to leave the morgue.

"Ryan, find out everything about Daniel Morrison, especially where he lived. Castle and I will soon come back to the precinct." he heard her speak into the phone before the doors closed leaving him standing there with Lanie.

"What's wrong with her today? She didn't even think about the possibility of teleportation..." he poured like a five-year old.

"Besides the fact that your whole theory is pretty unlikely to be true, she's just a little stressed out... she needs to relax and..." Lanie's voice trailed off, hoping he would understand what her friend desperately needed. He was kind of speechless, he just didn't know what to say. Lanie and he had never discussed those kind of things, especially not when it concerned Beckett.

"You're coming Castle?" his girlfriend asked opening the door again before he could think of an appropriate reply for Lanie.

"Sure." he turned around and went out with Beckett.

* * *

It turned out Daniel Morrison was 24 years old and had been involved in several brawls while being in high school but since then he hadn't attracted any attention. Nothing indicated him being involved in illegal activities, apparently he had turned his life around and tried to help troubled teenager getting on the right path, a good guy as it seemed.

Now the three detectives and Castle were standing in front of the door that led to Morrison's appartement, where he lived alone as they'd found out, while the janitor was fumbling with the keys to let them in. The room they entered seemed warm with its walls printed in a dark shade of red, at their left side was a little cooking area neatly cleared up, nothing showing any sign of having been used. To their right side a beige couch was arranged opposite a small flat screen TV. Somehow the whole room felt sterile as if no one ever lived here, like a fake appartement in some furniture store.

"Seems like he hasn't been here in a while..." Beckett said looking around.

"Or maybe he was just a very neat person..." Castle stated slowly also letting his gaze wandering around the whole room.

"I can't see any photos, might get a little difficult to find out who the girl was he met..." Ryan mentioned walking toward the sitting area.

"Shh." Esposito lay a finger on his mouth pointing toward the closed door on the other side of the room with his other hand. Had there been a noise? Yes, there it was again, not doubt, there was someone in the other room. Holding their guns the detectives walked slowly through the room until they reached the door. Silently they agreed that Beckett would go in first followed by Ryan and Esposito while Castle would stay in the background like usual.

When they finally opened the door they saw a woman standing with her back towards them going through a drawer arranged in the top left corner of the room, which had to be Morrison's bed room.

"NYPD turn around, hands where I can see them!" Beckett demanded.

But what awaited them once the young woman turned around took everyone by surprise, standing in front of them was the girl from the photo. Neither Beckett nor the others could believe their luck, they had had no idea how to find the girl and now they just found her standing in the victim's appartement, finally the day got better.

"I can explain..." she started her hands still down but was interrupted.

"Who are you?" Beckett asked eying the girl in front of her carefully. She wore a bordeaux blazer with a white top underneath it to a black skinny jeans with black wedgies.

"Chris." she answered shortly, eying the four people in front of her with a look that made clear she wouldn't feel intimidated by them. She didn't even try to hide her arrogant attitude as she lay both hands on her hips.

"And do you also have a last name?" Beckett was pissed of, who did this girl think she was talking to? Standing there like the embodiment of arrogance the girl left no doubt that no one had ever taught her what respect meant and that she should have it when talking to the police.

"No." the girl looked her directly in the eyes as if she wanted to stare her down.

Castle stood several feet behind his girlfriend and just watched, he was stunned by the way this girl defied Beckett. The look on her face could easily keep up with the one most suspects received from Beckett during an interrogation. Beckett's green eyes were boring into the blue ones of Chris, neither of them averting their gaze. It felt like a duel and nobody wanted to look away because that would mean giving the other one the benefit of winning. Somehow Castle thought this was hot, incredibly hot. God how much he loved Kate Beckett.

"Well then... Chris, you're under arrest..." she slowly walked toward the girl, her voice was calm, too calm for the situation, dangerously calm. But still Chris dared to interrupt her.

"But I've got a key.." she tried to explain, while Esposito and Ryan went around her to the drawer to look if they could find what she was looking for.

"... For the murder of Daniel Morrison." Beckett didn't even react to the excuse the girl came up with and handcuffed her.

"How ironical..." Chris muttered under her breath rolling her eyes as Beckett lead her out of the room, Castle following her closely.

"God I could use a coffee now..." he exclaimed looking at Beckett, silently asking if she also wanted one. But she just stared, again.

He really was ruggedly handsome, she could see why most woman would fall for him, she did too. But although she was just one woman under many that were amazed by his appearance she was special, because she knew she owned his heart. He was as desperately in love with her as she was with him, the feeling was breathtakingly. She couldn't wait for the evening to arrive so she could be alone with him living out what she'd already dreamed of the whole day.

"Across the street is this little coffee shop, I could get us two..." he explained when his girlfriend didn't say a word.

"Coffee sounds great." she answered with a coy smile.

"Do I also get one?" Chris cut in, earning quizzical looks, both from Castle and Beckett. Somehow they had forgotten about the girl and besides, which person that had just been arrested for murder would have the nerves to ask for coffee?

"No!" Beckett said giving her one of her glares.

Castle then went through the door to go to the coffee shop but before Beckett could also reached the hall of the appartement building Esposito appeared again. He told her that Ryan had found something and she should look for herself while he would bring the girl into the didn't have a clue of what Chris had been looking for and what Ryan could possibly have found, after all this appartement seemed very sterile and it seemed as if Morrison had looked out for no one to find out anything about his life.

"What did you find?" she asked as she entered the room again.

"This photo lay in the drawer, I don't know if it means anything but... Well... You should just look at it yourself..." Ryan seemed a little nervous and as if he didn't know how to deal with whatever it showed. Somehow this behaviour made Beckett curious what it was but she'd never expected what she saw when she looked at the picture, that Ryan hold towards her.

It looked as if it was taken on a party, there were several students dancing in the background with cups full of beer in their hands while in the front three people were sitting on a couch. The guy on the right side of the couch was bending over a small table, that had some white powder on it, cocaine as Beckett assumed. But that was not what shocked her, the really shocking detail was the ginger haired girl sitting next to the guy, Alexis.

What did she do there? Since when did she hang out with people consuming drugs? And why did Morrison have this picture? If he knew Alexis, Beckett would have to talk to her about him. If that picture had fallen into the wrong hands, Castle's hands, that would have turned out really bad. What if Morrison had blackmailed her? God she would have a motif.

"Beckett?" Ryan asked when she just kept staring at the photo.

"Not a single word to Castle, he doesn't have to know about this." she made clear as she gave the photo back to Ryan, then turned around to leave.

Her thoughts were spinning, what did this picture mean? She couldn't tell Castle about this could she? No, she had to keep it a secret, at least as long as Alexis was a suspect. Alexis a suspect, that sounded so wrong, really wrong.

**As I said before please take the time to review so I know there are people actually reading this. It would be really great to know the thoughts of everyone who follows this story or has added it to their faves, no matter if they are good or bad thoughts. Maybe this way it get's easier for me to write the next chapters and update sooner ;) **


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Thank you so much for the reviews and follows, I really liked to see people like this story :) **

**Enjoy reading now ;)**

****Chris was sitting in the interrogation room looking rather bored, she didn't know for how long she'd sat there already but it sure felt like it was too long. As soon as Esposito had arrived at the precinct he'd taken her into the room, leaving her there for Beckett to interrogate. However that wasn't really what Beckett had planned, she actually wanted to let the girl have some time to think about what she had done, maybe this way Chris would be a little more willing to cooperate.

Even though she had arrested the girl officially for the murder Beckett was quite sure that the girl had nothing to do with that, but that was something Chris didn't have to know right away. This girl had no respect for others and was so full of herself, it was time someone taught her a lesson and Kate Beckett was more than willingly to do so.

Castle stood with her in the observation room, watching Chris intently for what had already been half an hour. Most of the time his thoughts had been spinning around the little encounter between the two woman in the victim's appartement, they seemed to be pretty similar. Both, Kate and Chris, were tough woman, knowing exactly what they were doing. Kate had certainly been acting like the girl when she was at that age, he thought and therefore did't understand why she seemed to be really pissed off by the way Chris acted.

"Why are we just staring at her again?" he broke the silence between them.

"We're not staring, we're just giving her time to think." Beckett stated not moving her eyes off the pane.

"Well it pretty much feels like you're staring at her..." he watched the girl again inside the interrogation room. Chris was eying her fingernails carefully as if she wanted to demonstrate how bored and unimpressed she was by Beckett's little game.

Time passed in which neither one of them said another word, both were again deeply in their own thoughts. Castle trying to find out what made this whole thing between his girlfriend and the girl so fascinating, after all he'd seen Kate interact with many suspects but this, right here, felt different.

And Beckett trying to figure out what to do about the other situation at hand, the apparent relation of Daniel Morrison to Castle's daughter. Hiding it from him made her feel like she was lying and she didn't want to. Lies are what break people apart, if you're in a relationship with someone you love, and she really loved Castle, you should be able to trust your partner and he should be able to trust you. You don't lie to the people you love. But you also protect the people you love, so what if you can only protect them by lying? That really was a huge predicament.

She didn't feel comfortable with lying to him, she'd never been the type to tell people she loved Lies. But lately she found herself keeping things from her friends, she'd lied to Ryan and Esposito about her relationship with Castle, not to mention Lanie, her best friend. So why stop hiding things now? Right because it was Castle, she couldn't lie to him. She'd done that before, pretended she didn't knew about his feelings for almost a year, and it had almost driven them apart. Who knows if they'd overcome it a second time. No she definitely had to tell him, but not now. First she had to talk to Alexis, just a talk, not an interrogation.

"Doesn't really seem like your plan is working..." Castle spoke again slowly.

"No it doesn't..." she had to admit begrudgingly. "So what are we going..." he started to ask but when Beckett cut in he realized she hadn't been paying attention.

"How can some young woman be that calm when she's been arrested for murder? She doesn't even seem to care. She just sits there provocatively as if she wants to challenge me." she exclaimed clearly not understanding what might be going on in the girl's head.

"She doesn't know you're watching her, she can't be challenging you." he felt the need to clarify that.

"I know she cannot see me! But she's just so..." Beckett was searching for the right words to describe Chris but found nothing that fitted.

"frustrating?" Castle offered knowing exactly what she was talking about.

"Yes, frustrating!" she said thankfully.

"So..." he wanted to know what she was planning on doing now.

"We'll go in there now, let's see how calm she'll be then..." she smiled confidently, being sure she'll be able to unsettle the girl.

Although Castle wasn't so sure about that, after all she hadn't really managed to intimidate her up to now, neither in the appartement nor here in the precinct by letting her wait. But he decided it was best to keep his mouth shut and follow her into the other room.

When Beckett walked into the room followed by Castle Chris didn't even bother to look up from her perfect manicured fingernails, she seemed to not care at all.

"Oh was watching me suddenly not so interesting anymore?" she suddenly said still not looking at them before the couple could sit down.

Both of them looked shocked at her as if they'd been caught but on Castle's side was also a little amusement noticeable. This girl was good, how did she know? She had caught Beckett off guard, this interrogation just got even more interesting. He was curious what Beckett would reply and eyed her out of the corner of his eyes. She stood there frozen for a few seconds, she certainly hadn't expected that but soon got back to her pokerface.

"I'm detective Beckett..." she told the girl as she sat down not averting her eyes from Chris.

"Oh I know who you are..." she still didn't look at her, showing again how little respect she had. Castle slowly sat down next to his girlfriend, amazed by the calmness Chris apparently had.

"I'm really sorry you had to wait." Beckett lied.

"Cut the crap, you're not." finally Chris looked up, her eyes full of arrogance. Castle looked from one woman to the other, sensing that this outburst wouldn't go without Beckett getting pissed.

"Okay you're right, I'm not. You'd even deserve to wait longer but..." and there it was, she didn't shout or something, no her voice had a bitter-sweet sound and was way too calm. Castle knew that this voice meant the girl should run, his girlfriend was about to get really angry and an angry Kate Beckett was the least you want to face.

"But it drove you crazy, that it didn't bother me." Chris interrupted her to finish the sentence, smiling superiorly.

With every second Castle watched the girl he got more amused, Beckett exploding was certainly just a matter of time, this girl was playing with fire and had no clue how dangerous it was.

"You think you're clever..." Beckett eyed the girl with a slight smile on her face, she would show her that messing with her was a bad idea.

"Well I'd say I know I'm clever..." Chris was very self-confident, a little too self-confident in Castle's thoughts but he found it just great. Watching Beckett and Chris here in this interrogation room was like a game, two predators circling around each other, each of them confident to win. This was better than any tv-show and seeing Beckett like that somehow turned him on, she was so incredibly sexy right now.

"Being caught in Mr. Morrison's appartement searching for something after killing him actually doesn't seem so clever to me." Beckett mentioned looking Chris directly in the eyes, trying to find a hint that the girl felt guilty but she had no luck.

"There's just one catch to your little theory Princess, I didn't kill him!" did she just call Beckett princess? Oh this just got better, Castle thought.

"For you I'm still detective Beckett!" she clarified, her voice was icy.

"Yeah sure detective..." the girl rolled her eyes clearly still not seeing how serious the situation was.

"So you've been informed of your rights?" she was in her usual interrogation mode again, completely in control, not showing any emotions.

"I guess the hot detective mentioned something like that..." did she try to provocate her? Castle was sure the girl knew what effect her behavior had on Beckett, she was too clever not to know.

"Detective Esposito." she told her not giving away that she got more angry with every time Chris opened her mouth.

"That's his name?" she smiled mischievously, knowing it would drive Beckett nuts.

"Do you want to tell me your full name now?" the detective chose to ignore the remark, she knew she had to stay focused, even if it was kind of hard to do.

"No not really..." Chris shook her head slightly grinning at both Castle and Beckett.

"Why were you in the appartement?" now the interrogation finally began.

"I was looking for something." did she really think they hadn't figured that out already? Of course not, this was just another proof of how arrogant the girl was.

"And what was that?" Beckett questioned further, looking straight into the girl's blue eyes to intimidate her but without any luck. Chris didn't seem to be impressed at all by Beckett's look, which didn't occurs that often because most people couldn't stand that look. Castle himself hoped to never in his life get one of those looks from his girlfriend.

"Nothing you should care about."Chris didn't back away but looked back at her with the same intense look she received from the detective sitting across the table.

"Well I'm a detective, it's my job to care about it. So what was it?" Beckett started to get impatient, this little game got more annoying with every word Chris said and the fact that she still had no clue what Alexis had to do with this whole case made it even worse. She definitely had to know what was going on here, after all she was lying to the man she loved, but Chris seemed to be rather unwilling to help.

"A picture." the girl said simply, still holding the eye-contact.

"A picture of what?" Beckett asked hoping to finally get something important out of her.

"Me and Daniel."

"And how did you know Mr. Morrison?" now this interrogation took finally the turn Beckett had hoped it would.

"He was my boyfriend, that's also why I got the key. So looks like you've got nothing on me..." Chris seemed to be really confident of her victory and showed her the key, which she'd had in her pocket.

"You seem to forget I arrested you for murder..." Beckett told her happy to erase the self-satisfied grin on the girls face.

"Oh I didn't kill him and you know that... but in case you were wondering I've got an alibi, I was on a party at the Columbia University, all night." as Castle had thought the girl's grin didn't disappear but grew even wider when she informed Beckett of her whereabouts for the time Morrison was killed.

He watched his girlfriend closely, trying to figure out what was going on in her mind. It seemed to be hard on her to face such a strong young woman, who resembled her in so many ways, not only her strength and mimic but also her cleverness. If Castle hadn't known better he would have thought the two woman were somehow related to each other.

"So if you don't mind I would like to go now!" with that the girl stood up and walked towards the door. Beckett was just about telling her to sit back down as Chris turned around having the self-satisfied smile on her face she'd had before.

"Oh and just to satisfy your curiosity, my name is Crystal Brooks." she winked at Beckett and was then out of the room before she could say a word.

Actually Beckett didn't even know what to say, there was nothing she could have kept Chris under arrest for, she'd had a key to the appartement and apparently she got an alibi for the time of the murder, which didn't surprise Beckett, she still didn't know what the motif of the girl could have been but still she would check if Chris had told the truth.

"You're letting her go just like that?" Castle asked surprised, he'd actually hoped for a final showdown between the two woman. Imagining his girlfriend showing this arrogant girl how much power she had by keeping her under arrest had somehow something arousing.

"Even though I don't like it, I have to... we've got nothing indicating that she actually killed Morrison..." she told him frustrated.

"But we know they knew each other..."

"Yes but there certainly are other people who knew him too, I can't arrest them all." besides his daughter was also one of the people, who'd known the victim. She would have to arrest her too, which made Beckett feel sick. She couldn't just arrest Castle's daughter but still that photo Ryan had found was a strong motif. Even if she'd wanted to keep Chris under arrest she had to admit that at this point even Alexis got a better motif than her.

"Right... but can't you keep people for a certain time although you've got no proof of their guilt?" Castle suggested.

"Yes I can but I'm sure that would've led to many problems. She seems to come from a wealthy family, I'm sure the best lawyers of New York would've come to get her out of here." Beckett explained hoping her boyfriend wouldn't notice that this wasn't the only reason for letting the girl of the hook.

"But she definitely would have deserved it..." he had found the girl as unfriendly as his girlfriend had done since they met in the appartement.

"You think?" she gave him one of her typical Beckett glares, she just couldn't believe he found that out just now.

* * *

**So that's it for today, I hope you liked this chapter... and hopefully you'll let me know what you're thinking ;)  
The next chapter will deal with the conversation between Kate and Alexis, anything you'd like to see in there? Any ideas how Alexis knew the victim?  
**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: So this chapter is a little longer than the others and i hope you like it, writing t nearly killed me because I couldn't decide how the conversation with Alexis should go... but I'm kinda happy with how it turned out :)**

**Disclaimer: Still I own nothing**

When Beckett and Castle walked out of the interrogation room it was already late afternoon. Esposito and Ryan had watched the interrogation from the other room, so as soon as they found out that the girl's full name was Crystal Brooks the two detectives had gotten to their computers to find out everything about her.

"Did you find anything yet?" Beckett asked walking towards the murder board.

"Yes, I checked Crystal's alibi and thanks to Facebook I found several people, that confirmed her being on that party. Apparently she had a really good time dancing on a table in her underwear..." Ryan told her smirking.

"The rich girl's are always the one's that party the hardest..." Castle said laughing slightly. Meanwhile Beckett was wondering if he'd realized that his own daughter could also be count to those rich girls he talked about and might party a little too hard.

"Only that 'rich girl' doesn't really fit to Crystal... she doesn't come from a wealthy background." Esposito cut in pinning a photo of her at the murder board.

"She doesn't?" Beckett was puzzled, why did her clothes look so expensive then?

"Crystal Brooks, 20 years old, she comes from Staten Island, her mother is Nora Brooks, died two years ago of an overdose. The father's unknown." he informed her.

"Wow she doesn't look like that at all..." Castle muttered looking to Beckett for reassurance. She nodded absent-mindedly, thinking of how well Chris had presented herself. She'd acted like she was superior, as if she looked down on most people because of her financial status although actually she was the one that came from a rather poor background.

"She was caught shoplifting a few years ago. Considering the clothes she wore today I'd say it's likely she stole them..." Esposito looked from Castle to Beckett, who was back in reality with her thoughts.

"We should call it a night and check Crystal Brooks living situation first thing in the morning." she said grabbing her jacket and walked towards the elevator, Castle following her.

"So your place or mine? You know my mother is out of town..." he asked eagerly knowing exactly how he wanted this day to end. Both of them panting, lying with tangled legs in each others arms coming down from their high and gathering from Beckett's well let's call them concentration problems, he was sure she wouldn't say no to what he'd planned.

"Your place sounds good..." the wide grin on her face confirmed what he'd already known but inside Beckett had to admonish herself. She couldn't just go home with him to satisfy the need, that had been building up inside of her for the whole day, while she was actually betraying him by not telling him that his daughter might be a suspect in their current murder case. No she couldn't do that, she had to talk to Alexis first.

"But could I meet you there in about an hour? There's something I've got to take care of first..." she told him and he immediately sensed that something was wrong.

"What is it Kate? If you want, I can come with you..." he offered wanting to stand by her side through everything especially when it was something she obviously had problems dealing with. Then they both stepped into the elevator, which arrived just at that moment.

"No Castle, no it's fine. I'll be okay..." she gave him a weak smile.

"You're sure?" he asked concerned being a little disappointed because she didn't even tell him what it was she needed to take care of first. Whatever it was it had to be really important, why else would she delay what he'd known she craved for since he'd seen her at the crime scene.

"I promise I'll tell you later but I really need to do this alone... But I'll be okay." she reassured him placing one hand on his upper arm smiling slightly and as soon as the elevator doors closed her lips met his telling him how sorry she was.

* * *

She sat in her car outside the dormitory Alexis lived in since she'd moved out and didn't want to get out. But why, why was she suddenly this afraid of talking to her boyfriend's daughter? Alexis was a good girl, she certainly had nothing to do with the murder and even if she sits next to a drug consuming guy on the picture, that didn't necessarily mean she's into drugs too. The girl was clever and responsible, she had been the grown up at home while her dad was stuck in his childhood years most of the time.

Beckett frowned thinking of Castle, he didn't know she was here. She felt bad again for not telling him, hadn't he a right to know that she was considering his daughter a suspect? No, actually she didn't consider her a suspect, she just wanted to talk to her as Kate, not as Detective Beckett.

Although this was kind of odd, thinking about it she actually hadn't really talked to Alexis since Castle and she got together. She knew indeed that Castle's daughter was okay with them being together, she'd always liked her and even met with her the one time some years ago to talk about spending some time in another country because Beckett had done that, but still Kate had been scared to talk to her alone now that she was in a relationship with her dad.

God she was nervous like hell. What was she going to say to her? Just asking her what that photo meant wasn't an option, she'd immediately get the impression she'd be interrogated or worse suspected of doing something illegal. Definitely not good considering Kate wanted to grow old with Castle, which inevitably meant having Alexis also for the rest of her life around. But the only other option would be pretending to finally want to talk to her as her father's girlfriend, who wants to bond with her.

No doubt she would notice how odd this sudden decision was and ask herself why Kate couldn't just call to ask her out for coffee the next day so they could talk. Alexis would sense something different was going on, also not the perfect thing to do. So the question, of what was the better option remained open, neither one of them would set a good start for their relationship. Why for god's sake hadn't she had the guts to talk to the girl before this mess came up?

Taking a deep breath she got out of the car, she knew she had to get to Alexis' dorm sooner or later so why waiting any longer and worry. Just let's get it over with, she thought walking towards the door. There's nothing to be afraid of, she told herself noticing that she walked slower and slower the nearer Alexis room came. Alexis was just a 18-year old girl, not the first one she'd talk to, so why did she feel this insecure? Right, it was more than important that she'd get off on the right foot with her, she wasn't any girl, she was Castles little girl and Kate was his girlfriend so not getting along with Alexis wasn't an option.

Kate was now standing in front of Alexis' dorm and tried to gather the courage to knock when suddenly the door flung open and a blonde girl bumped into her shouting back into the room "I'll be back in a sec!"

"Oh I... sorry..." she stumbled looking puzzled at Kate and turning to leave.

Before the door could close completely Kate placed a food in it and slowly opened it knocking on the frame of the door.

"Alexis?" her voice was steadier than she'd expected. After all she was quite nervous to talk to her and didn't know how and especially where to start so Castle's daughter wouldn't get the wrong impression.

"Yes?" came the voice of the girl from around the corner and Alexis stepped into Kate's view. She looked surprised to find her father's girlfriend standing in front of her and froze for a moment before a worried look appeared on her face.

"Detective Beckett... is my father alright?" she asked concerned.

"Oh no it's not that, he's fine. Alexis I'm here to talk to you..." Kate smiled slightly at her, not only to assure the girl, that her father was fine, but also to calm her own nerves. She didn't want to seem insecure, she would just talk to her, tell her that she doesn't suspect her of doing anything illegal. She would understand it right?

"Oh... you know I don't really have time detective... I was just about going out with some friends..." the girl gestured nervously towards the door the blonde one had hurried out, she did her best to avoid eye-contact

"It won't take long, I promise." Kate just had to get it over with before she couldn't overcome her fear anymore.

"Okay... so I suppose this is about me calling dad yesterday? I know you two had planned on spending the evening together, I'm sorry I disturbed you..." the words blurted out of her, apparently she'd been somehow afraid Beckett was mad at her for crashing the lovely evening Castle and she had planned.

"What... ehhr no actually that's not why I'm here..." wow that came out of nowhere. Why would Alexis think she'd come to talk about how annoyed she was that Castle had rushed to her dorm the previous evening? Okay she had to admit she'd been a little annoyed, but not because of Alexis more because she couldn't believe she could have this bad fortune.

Still, Kate hadn't even thought of the possibility of her visit giving Alexis this impression but this way she could assure her first that she likes her and who knows maybe that was helpful when finally telling her about the actual reason she came.

"You're not?" Alexis was surprised and her eyes met Kate's for the first time that day.

"No, I totally understand that you needed your father yesterday and that's really okay, you'll always have priority. I'd never want to get between you and your dad, I hope you know that..." Kate assured her taking a few steps forward so she was standing inside the little room instead of the doorway.

"Then why are you here detective?" Alexis seemed to be a,little confused just as Beckett had thought she would. Maybe she should have brought Castle with her after all, that way she wouldn't be hiding anything from him and might feel more comfortable talking to Alexis right now.

It had definitely been a mistake to come here alone... No actually it wasn't, what could possibly be worse for a girl than to have her dad's girlfriend drag said dad to the girl and in someway accuse her of having something to do with druggies or even of being one herself? That would definitely just complicate any try of bonding between them. No doubt it had been the right decision to leave Castle clueless, he would have just worried over nothing, well at least Kate hoped that it was nothing.

"First, I think I remember telling you to call me Kate." she still didn't understand why Alexis just couldn't call her by her first name, she'd told her already several times she was just Kate and not Detective Beckett when they were talking.

"Right..." she said blushing slightly.

"So I hope you don't get me wrong when I tell you this... The case I'm currently working on led us into Daniel Morrison's appartement and we found this photo..." Kate just wanted to say it already but it was really hard, how should she do this? Bluntly asking if she's hanging out with druggies most certainly wasn't the right approach, even if the main reason for coming here was so she'd know how Alexis knew the victim.

"A photo? What photo?" the ginger haired girl was confused, apparently she had no idea what her dad's girlfriend was talking about.

"It shows some people sitting on a couch during what seems to be party and one of the guys is apparently taking drugs..." she eyed Castle's daughter closely, trying to read her and getting a hint of whether Alexis finally got what the picture might show.

"I don't seem to understand... what does all of this have to do with me?" Alexis said a little nervously, or did Kate just imagined that?

"The picture shows you sitting next to this guy... I'm sure you don't take anything but for our investigation it would be good to know why Daniel Morrison has a picture that shows you and how you knew him..." she explained hoping the girl would understand that she wasn't accusing her of doing anything wrong.

"How I knew him? Past tense? Does... Does this mean Daniel is dead?" Alexis' eyes widened, she was shocked. Disbelieving she shook her head, still hoping she came to the wrong conclusion and Daniel was still alive.

"I'm afraid he's our victim..." Kate watched her, sensing that she must have known the victim better.

Tears started to escape the girl's eyes, causing Kate to feel uncomfortable. Should she try to comfort her, hug her? What would be the right thing to do in this situation?

If this had been an ordinary interrogation or conversation with the victim's relatives she would have known exactly what to do. She would just find some words to ease the pain and assure that she would do her best to find the one responsible for all of this, she would stay professional. But this right here was different, this was Castle's daughter, who stood there crying in front of her. As his girlfriend she should give her a shoulder to lean on right?

So why was she even thinking about it, she should just do it. Right she didn't do it because she wasn't sure if Alexis would appreciate that, after all Kate was the one Castle had been risking his life for, for over four years, maybe she hated Kate because of that and to be honest she couldn't blame her if so.

"I'm sorry Alexis... it seems you've really cared about him..." she took a few steps towards the girl and lay a hand on her shoulder. A save gesture to show that she respected Alexis' personal space but still really cared about her.

"Well... actually I didn't know him that well, I only met him a few times but I don't know... he was still so young..." Alexis tried to explain what she felt.

"I know..." Kate gave her a sympathetic look.

"But... I don't know why this has such an impact on me... I've already seen a few young people, who died... you know in the morgue..." Alexis was clearly not sure how to deal with her feelings.

"It's different when you knew the victim, no matter if you just saw him a few times or knew him well, you're more affected." she felt a little helpless, Castle should be here to comfort her. His daughter needed a hug and Kate wasn't sure whether she should just do it and hope Alexis wouldn't mind.

"Okay... so you said you wanted to know how I knew him right?" she had calmed down a little and remembered why Kate actually came.

"If you need time..." Beckett didn't want to push her.

"No, it's fine... I met Daniel on a party, he was talking to Ethan, my bo... a friend..." Alexis went on. Of course Kate noticed, that she'd wanted to call this Ethan her boyfriend but now wasn't the right time to ask about it.

She was more concerned why Morrison had talked to the boy, knowing that the victim had been helping troubled teenagers getting on the right path and considering that the photo they'd found showed a guy taking drugs sitting next to Alexis led to the assumption that Ethan was trouble.

"I know what you think, but he's not, at least not anymore..." the girl said noticing the look on Kate's face.

"So Ethan's the guy on the photo?" she got a nod as an answer.

"Alexis... I really don't think you would and I know I've got no right to ask you this, you don't have to tell me if you don't want to but you haven't also been using..." she had to get the answer, being certain Castle's daughter was still on the right path would calm her nerves.

"No, god, no I've never even tried it..." Alexis said shaking her head vehemently when the door opened and the girl from earlier appeared in the room, wearing black hot pants, matching high heels and a glitter top with a plunging neckline that felt like it would reach all the way down to her navel.

"You're coming?" she asked Alexis, but frowned when she saw her fried still wearing jeans and a loose shirt.

Right, Kate remembered Alexis mentioning something about wanting to go out with friends, but she hadn't thought going out with friends would include dressing like a hooker. The girl's outfit was definitely highly inappropriate for a party night. Kate would definitely not wear something like that, at least not in public, but to seduce Castle it would fit perfectly, he wouldn't be able to think clearly anymore.

"Sure..." Alexis looked towards Kate hoping they were finished.

"Great, I've just found the perfect outfit for you in my closet, don't move, I'll catch it!" and then her friend was gone, leaving Kate hoping that Alexis' outfit would cover more of her body than her friend's did.

"I should go now.. " Beckett smiled still not sure about where she and Alexis were standing, was the girl mad because she'd bluntly asked if she'd been into drugs with Ethan?

"Yes..." she also seemed to be unsure of something.

"I hope you're not mad... I had to ask you know.. " just asking was the best way to find out, right?

"Oh no, I'm not, I understand, you're a detective..." she was surprisingly understanding.

"But I was here as someone, who really cares about you..." it was true, she cared about her, a lot and because of that, and the fact that she was in love with Alexis' father, it was so important to get along with her.

"You were here as my Dad's girlfriend... but without him..." she noticed.

"Yes... I didn't tell him..." Kate confessed still feeling a little bad for her decision.

"And will you? I mean all of it?" she asked cautiously.

"I guess... maybe I'll leave out the drugs..." she'd avoided thinking about what exactly she'd tell Castle once she got to the loft but she decided she could think about it while driving to him.

"That would be great, Dad would just worry over nothing." Alexis said smiling.

"Yes... so I've got to go... bye." Kate opened the door and waved goodbye.

"Bye..."

When Kate closed the door she looked up the hallway and discovered Alexis' friend hurrying over again, in her hands a bundle of clothes, First she couldn't make out what exactly she'd brought for Alexis but as the blonde approached she hoped her eyes were fooling her. Was that a leather corsage?

**I'm dying to hear yor thoughts, so please press the little button below and review :) How do you think should Castle react when Beckett tells him where she was and why? And should she also tell him about the drugs? **


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: So actually I had wanted to upload this chapter by yesterday but well life got in the way... Hope all of you like it :)**

**Disclaimer: Even if I'd like to, I own nothing...**

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Getting into the elevator to Castle's loft she knew the evening would probably end in a way neither of them had wanted. She should have told him about the photo as soon as Ryan had found it, he was her partner in- and outside of work. She trusted him with her life and her heart but still she'd lied to him.

Once there had been a time where keeping secrets was a part of their lives, when both couldn't be honest with each other. But they'd left those times behind the day she appeared on his doorstep soaking wet because she'd walked all those blocks from the precinct to his loft. The day her wall came down and she realized that everything becomes unimportant if she can't spend every second of her life with him.

With a loud ping the elevator doors opened and Castle's door appeared in front of her as she walked out. Just a few hours ago she couldn't have waited to get inside, to let him undress her while she would impatiently fumble with his belt so they'd both get rid of the layers separating their bare skin. But now she walked slowly towards the door, wishing for more time to prepare herself.

Inside of her the lust was still lingering, she would still love to just take him into his bedroom and forget everything, to revel in his love for her. There was nothing she wished more for at the moment when she stood in front of the door, but she knew she wouldn't be able to look at herself if she was that selfish and waited to tell him so she could feel the love he kept in his heart for her a little longer. And one thing was certain, once she'd tell him neither of them would think about spending the night with amazing, world shattering sex, which in fact was what they had from the first night on. Taking a last deep breath she knocked on the door hesitantly.

"There you are." Castle said smiling when he opened the door.

He was so happy to see her that it almost broke her heart, she had to tell him right away, that she betrayed him... again. No avoiding the topic, just get it out there and hope he would understand and forgive her... again.

"I cooked for us... coque au vin. Hope you like it... I actually never tried it before..." he said leading her into the kitchen, not even noticing the guilty look on her face.

Okay so maybe just get it out there after dinner. It smelled mouth-watering good, Beckett had always wondered if there was anything Richard Castle wasn't good at, but for obvious reasons she wasn't really hungry.

"It smells deliciously..." she gave him a little smile.

"Is everything okay? I mean... Did everything went fine where you headed after work?" he noticed that her smile was more to distract him from what actually was going on.

"Well kind of..." No, nothing was okay but she would tell him later.

"Want to talk about it?" he asked not wanting to push her into talking, she would tell him at some point, he just had to wait.

"Maybe after dinner..." hell there was no maybe. She would definitely tell him after dinner. Not telling him wasn't an option.

"Ok... " he trusted her, she would tell him when she was ready to. Hopefully that would happen soon, she looked really bad. How comes he hadn't noticed it as soon as he'd opened the door, she looked miserable.

"I suppose we've a glass of wine along dinner." it wasn't a question as he was already opening a bottle of her favorite one.

Beckett nodded slightly, wine was good, maybe the alcohol would loosen her tongue and give her the courage to tell him about Alexis and how she knew the victim. Hopefully the time dinner brought her would be enough to prepare her for his reaction, which certainly wouldn't be cheerful.

"So why don't you just sit down and I serve you my incredibly good smelling dish." Castle suddenly said trying his best to lighten the mood.

Kate hadn't noticed that she was still standing there totally insecure and without any idea of what to do. Castle was too good to her, she didn't deserve this man, at least not after she'd betrayed him again.

"I can help you, you don't need..." she took a few steps towards her boyfriend.

"Just let me do it, here sit down and enjoy dinner." he shoved her to the table and on a chair smiling happily.

Beckett didn't want him to get angry, there was time enough to be so after dinner, so she went along with it and waited for Castle to set the plates on the table.

As they sat opposite each other, each of them having a plate in front of them along with a glass of red wine, they smiled halfheartedly. Castle sensed that something was wrong but couldn't imagine what it was. She had seemed so happy and had waited impatiently for the evening because it had taken a lot of self-discipline to not jump him at work. But apparently she didn't want to talk about it and he wouldn't push her to, so what else could he do? It broke his heart to see her like that, she wasn't even eating, she was just pecking at her food. And then he came to a decision, he would distract her from whatever was going on in her head.

"So... Alexis..." he started.

"What?" her head shot up and her eyes widened. Did he know anything? God he knew she'd talked to his daughter, he had to. Alexis must have called him right after she'd left the dorm.

"When she called she was pretty upset..." he went on, not noticing that his girlfriend seemed to be on the edge of getting a panic attack.

So she'd been right. Alexis had called him and probably told him about their little talk. What was she going to do now? She really should have told him as soon as he'd opened the door, that she'd talked to his daughter. But now it was too late, he already knew it and she hadn't taken the chance to tell him herself.

"You know, when she told me she had trouble with that boy I felt a little out of place... I didn't know how to react to her being frustrated because she hadn't had enough time alone with him... it was completely new territory for me..." he explained knowing that this topic probably wasn't the ideal distraction for her but maybe she would open up to him once he shared his problem with her.

Kate took a deep breath of relief, he was talking about the call he'd received from his daughter the previous evening. So there was still time to tell him herself about Alexis being involved in their current case and that she apparently had a boyfriend that had been into drugs.

"I know how scary that must have been for you..." she knew it just too well, she'd felt the same way when she went to see Alexis.

"Somehow I wished she had someone else to talk to about those things... she's my little girl and I don't really want to think about her being with a guy..." Castle didn't often wish for a mother figure in Alexis' life, after all he kind of did a good job the past 18 years. but now he would be grateful for one. And this one should be responsible and caring, or let's just say everything that Meredith wasn't.

"But you handled it pretty well when she was with Ashley..." Kate tried to reassure him, so he would know that she believed in him.

"Yes but that was high school, she loved here and I could always have an eye on what she was doing. Now she's in college and god knows what she's doing with this boy... the writer in me comes up with really devastating pictures... what if they're having..." he couldn't even finish this thought.

"You know her. she's 18 and responsible. If she and this boy are sleeping together she knows how to be save." yes Alexis was responsible and that's why she had nothing to do with drugs except for having a boyfriend, who used to be into them. Beckett was sure... well kind of.

"But she shouldn't be sleeping with anyone, she's still my little girl. who's afraid monsters hide under her bed." Castle's parental urge to protect his daughter got the overhand, in his mind Alexis was way too young to engage in any sexual activity for at least another 10 years.

"Don't you think you're a little harsh? Did she ever give you any good reason to worry?" Kate knew his daughter had always been the perfect example of a responsible young woman and that he'd never had a really good reason to worry about her well-being, at least up to now. But that wasn't the point, Castle didn't know about what Alexis' boyfriend was or had done on parties, so he still had nothing to worry about.

"Well not exactly... she wasn't one of those bored rich girls, who thought it might be some fun to get into trouble with boys or drugs... so no, I guess you're right. I should trust her. she knows what she does." Castle admitted.

"Or did she say something yesterday, that made you doubt it?" she asked. Maybe he'd had gotten an idea about the things going on in his daughter's life when he'd visited her and wad worried because she'd told him something about Ethan.

"I don't know... she told me this guy had lied to her a lot when they started dating and that she wasn't sure whether she could trust him... actually what she said reminded me a lot of you and me..." he explained smiling at the end as he remembered their past of lying to each other, which they'd fortunately overcome, at least he thought so.

His girlfriend got an even worse feeling in her stomach meanwhile, she couldn't believe how she could have been that stupid and started hiding such an important thing. like his daughter being involved in their case, from him.

"And what did you tell her?" Kate wasn't even sure if she really wanted to know but hey could this get any worse?

"That if he loves her he won't lie to her anymore and that if she really loves him she shouldn't contemplate whether or not, but know that she can trust him... just like I know that I can trust you, Kate..." as soon as he'd said the words she wished, that she'd never asked him. Of course her situation had to get even worse, some higher power was indeed punishing her for making the wrong decision about the photo. How could she possibly tell him that he was wrong trusting her?

"Kate, what's wrong, please talk to me... you don't eat and you look at me as if there was something you need to talk about... what is it, Kate?" screw not pushing, he needed to know what was going on because slowly he got the feeling that it was something major.

That's it, that's the best opportunity she'd het to start talking so why the hell was she looking at her plate saying nothing? Kate could slap herself for her cowardliness, she needed to say something or else she'd make it only worse. Castle would just get madder the longer she stayed silent, so she really had to start telling him about everything, including the drugs.

"Okay... you're right there's something I should tell you about..." she started carefully thinking about what to say next.

"What is it?" the love in his look was almost too much for Beckett. she did her best to avoid looking him in the eyes.

"I probably should have told you sooner but... god I really hope you won't hate me..." this was definitely harder than she'd imagined and she'd already expected it to be really hard.

"I could never hate you Kate..." he whispered feeling that she was more than just a little afraid of his reaction to what she was about to tell him.

"I went to see Alexis..." she blurted out feeling a little relieved to finally have found a way to start her confession.

"That's great, why would I hate you?" he didn't know why she thought that it was that big of a deal, he loved her for wanting to have a relationship to his daughter.

"I did so, and I'm really sorry, because there seemed to be a relation between her and Daniel Morrison..." she went on taking in every sound Castle made, the only problem was, he didn't make one. He said there silently and was watching her, she could feel his gaze on her and knew she should look at him, try to read his face, but she was a coward.

"I didn't want you to worry over nothing, so I didn't tell you when Ryan found a photo of Alexis and some other students in the victim's drawer..." she was still looking down.

"You knew since we were in his appartement that Alexis might know him and you didn't tell me?" she could hear in his voice that he was hurt.

"I just wanted to talk to her, give her the chance to explain everything before I tell you..." she explained hoping he would understand that she'd done it for Alexis.

"You talked to her without me? Did... did you think... why?" even if he tried his best to understand her reasons, he was at a loss of words.

"I thought maybe she wouldn't be okay with you on the same room when I ask her about the photo..." she was still avoiding any eye-contact, scared that if she would see the look on his face she would get weak and couldn't go on explaining everything.

"Why wouldn't she? It's not like she did something wrong... is it?" he stared at his girlfriend on horror as his mind was spinning over all the possible things the photo might show his daughter doing.

"It's more about the other Person on the photo... the guy, who sits next to her, is apparently taking drugs..." she was listening for Castle's reaction but he stayed silent again, making her feel insecure. She'd expected everything, him shouting at her for hiding so important things from him, him kicking her out of his apartment, him questioning their relationship and whether he could still trust her, but not this, not him simply saying nothing.

"I'm really sorry..." she repeated, hoping he would understand that she really regretted how she'd dealt with the whole situation.

"So you were not only hiding from me that my daughter knew the victim but also that she was with a druggie? Hell maybe that Alexis herself is taking drugs?" he couldn't believe that Kate would do something like that, that she would actually betray him by going to Alexis behind his back.

Beckett winced at the harsh tone in his voice, the last time he'd used it he'd given up on their relationship because she hadn't understood right away that her mother's murder was unimportant compared to the possibility of loosing him. She could only hope that he didn't give up on them now.

"Damn it Kate, can't you even look me in the eyes and tell me that you've betrayed me? That you took advantage of my trust?" now he was almost shouting with anger but she could still hear how much she'd hurt him.

Slowly she looked up but she wasn't prepared for what she saw. Castle sat in front of her, his lips trembling with anger while his eyes were glistening with tears. When had been the last time she'd seen him cry? Had she ever seen him cry? She wasn't sure. She always felt like he'd been her rock through everything, the one person she could lean on no matter what, the one who was strong and comforted her. And now he sat in front of her, vulnerable, upset, disappointed, a completely other man than she'd known.

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**So Castle is mad at her, can you blame him? What do you think how this should go on? Please let me know your thoughts and review becaus ethat would definitely make my day. I love to read them and it makes me write faster ;)**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: so here's the next chapter, I hope you like it and the fight turns out just like you hoped... The reviews I got for the last chapter were really nice and made writing much easier** **:)**

**But now enjoy reading :)**

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The way Castle sat opposite her was choking her. It was hard to see him this disappointed and angry while she had to admit she could understand him. She should have come to him first and asked him to stay calm and let her talk to Alexis before he'd do something he would only regret later on. This was her own fault, she'd made her bed and now she had to lie on it.

"Why... Kate, why? Now would be the time to explain everything!" Castle said still angry and disappointed that he'd been wrong trusting her.

"There's nothing more to explain... You've got every right to be mad at me." she said simply, not knowing what more to say.

"But why did you do it? Why didn't you come to me first?" when had she seen him this hurt the last time? Right, it had been the evening he walked out on her because she just couldn't get over her mother's case. And before that he'd looked this hurt when she didn't call for three months after Montgomery's funeral, why for god's sake did she have to always hurt him again like that?

"You really want to know?" her voice was barely more than a whisper, she wasn't really sure that Rick would understand her reasons because after all he looses all perspective and rationality every time it comes to Alexis.

"Yes because I just don't want to believe that I could possibly be so wrong about you. I trusted you, please tell me you had a good reason to betray me..." he was literally begging her to tell him a reasonable motif for all of this.

"I...It was just... Castle I knew you'd be running to Alexis to confront her as soon as I tell you." at first she didn't know how or where to start, this wasn't easy to explain.

"Of course I would. She's my daughter, it's what a father doe s when his kid's choosing the wrong path in live." Castle interjected angrily.

"But why do you immediately jump into conclusions and assume the worst? I was thinking about what if you accuse her and she's nothing to do with it... which as it turned out she doesn't seem to have, what would that mean for your relationship to her?" as she'd thought he couldn't understand.

"She probably would have been mad at me for some time until we sort things out." for him there was nothing to Kate's story that would excuse her actions.

"Exactly and I would've been to blame for it. How could I live with that? I don't want to get in between you and your daughter... you're the most important person in my life, I can't imagine loosing you..." she explained hoping so much that he would understand. By now tears, she'd tried so hard to hold back, were slowly escaping her eyes. She couldn't lose him, she wouldn't survive that. Especially not when it was of something she'd done, without any doubt would she always blame herself for him leaving her.

"I don't want to lose you either, I love you Kate... but why does that explain you not talking to me?" his voice was now softer but he still didn't move, didn't come to her side, didn't touch her.

"You know what Alexis might have thought of me if I told you first and let you accuse her something she probably didn't even do? She would have hated me for destroying your trust in her... what chances do we stand when your daughter hates me?" there it was her fear of loosing him because of mot getting along with Alexis.

She waited for him to say something but he just stared at her. Reading his face was beyond her at that moment, she couldn't say what he was feeling.

"Maybe I should go now... let you sleep on this... We can talk tomorrow. Just promise to call me." she slowly rose from th chair and made her way over to the door, Castle still sitting at the table as if he was paralyzed.

The uncertainty of what he was feeling was gut wrenching for her, not a single word had left his lips in the past minutes. She turned around a last time before she reached the door but Castle was still seated at the table staring at the empty spot where she'd sad before. He hadn't even said something when she'd stood up, no promise to call her tomorrow, nothing.

Did that mean he didn't want to talk about it anymore? That he was done with her? Only thought of that possibility made her want to just die so she wouldn't have to live with her misery she alone was to blame for. When she opened the door to leave she felt someone grabbing her wrist, Castle. Turning around she looked into his beautiful blue eyes that she found so mesmerizing.

He was still silent, just looking at her and holding her wrist firmly so she wouldn't go anywhere. Seconds passed that felt like minutes, hours maybe, until he finally opened his mouth to talk.

"You thought of Alexis? You did what was right for her even though it meant upsetting me?" it was as if he was still processing what Kate had just told him. She nodded slightly still unsure if he was angry or not.

"She came in first place, you really care about her..." he went on.

"Yes..." her voice was shaky when it dawned in that she'd put Alexis needs before her own ones, just as Castle had done the previous evening. She'd acted like a parent. He didn't say anything more but pulled her towards his chest so he could hold her in his arms, causing the tears from her eyes to escape even faster than before.

It felt so good to lie on hos arms, breathing in his scent. At that moment Beckett knew they would be alright eventually, if not today then tomorrow or the day after that or after that. It didn't matter because she knew she hadn't lost him. he was still here with her.

"I'm sorry for reacting the way I did... you had your reasons to first go see Alexis." he finally said after a few minutes just holding her and letting her cry into his chest.

"No Castle, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have kept this secret from you..." she looked him in the eyes to emphasize how sorry she was and how much she regretted everything.

"No, you did the right thing, you cared about my daughter more than about what your actions would mean to us... no one ever cared that much for her. Every woman I've ever dated had always been only caring for her to impress me, so I'd like them, but no one ever the guts to stand up against me because it was the best for Alexis. You really are extraordinary, Kate." he looked at her, his eyes showing how much he loved her.

"Still I should've told you and not kept it a secret... secrets already almost pulled us apart once..." she deeply regretted hurting him like this and swore to god that she would never do this again.

"I remember a wise person telling me once that every woman has her secrets and that sometimes for the sake of a relationship it is better not to share..." he said grinning at her widely, the unburdened Castle made an appearance again. When she looked up at him he used his thumps to wipe away her tears.

"I'm pretty sure you took that out of context." she smiled at him recognizing her own words.

"Well it might also apply here... but let's change the topic, you still want to eat?" he asked motioning towards the table with their dinner on.

"No... I'm not really hungry, sorry..." she said after deliberating, feeling bad for not being hungry after he'd cooked such a lovely meal for them.

"Great, me neither... well at least not hungry for food..." there was a sparkle in his eyes when smirked at her. What was that supposed to mean? Kate knew the look on his face too well but could he really... Did he actually meant what she thought he meant?

"You didn't think I forgot about the looks you gave me throughout the day, did you?" he asked when she didn't respond.

"No... eh... I thought..." she was puzzled. how could he go from being all angry and fighting with her to being as attracted to het as he'd been at the precinct?

"Great because I've already thought of something to erase all your frustration..." he winked at her still smirking and took her hand leading her towards his bedroom. The dishes could wait.

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The light shafts of sunlight were warming her face and brought her slowly back to the world around her. The last night felt unreal and if she hadn't felt Rick's arm around her waist she would have thought it had all been a dream, her mind playing tricks on her and that he'd walked out of her life. When she'd come to his appartement yesterday evening she'd imagined this night ending in so many different ways but that he'd gently make love to her hadn't been one of them. Not that she hadn't been grateful when he'd just went on after their fight as if nothing had happened but still it was a little confusing. Was really everything okay between the two of them?

Slowly she opened her eyes to take in her surroundings, she was laying together with Castle in his bed. She on her back while he lay on his stomach his right arm wrapped around her as if he was afraid she'd disappear. Dreamingly she watched him sleep, he seemed so peaceful and content as he lay there lost in his dream world. What might he been dreaming of? She could have laid there in his arms for all of time, just breathing in his scent and enjoying the warmth of his body next to her. But she knew that at some point she had to het up and to the precinct, it was a normal day and there was still the murder of Daniel Morrison to solve.

Suddenly her thoughts were interrupted by the ringing of a phone in the other room. She groaned, it had to be her phone, which she'd left in her purse in the kitchen. Considering whether or not to just ignore it she looked at her boyfriend, he didn't seem to hear anything and was still sound asleep. She didn't want him to wake up so ignoring it would be best she decided because if she would get up he certainly would notice. But what if it was the precinct? She had to answer it, even if she didn't want to. Slowly and carefully not to wake Castle she got out of bed.

"Go back to sleep, I'm just going to answer my phone." she explained hearing him groan slightly when she put on his shirt, which they'd tossed to the floor in his haze to undress the both of them, and went towards the bedroom's door.

Once in the kitchen she noticed the dishes still standing on the table, neither one of them had thought of washing up after their passionate love-making.

"Beckett" she answered the phone when she finally got it out of her purse.

"Yo Beckett, we looked into the living situations of Crystal Brooks and it turned out she's reported still living in Road Island where she'd lived with her mother but unfortunately no one has seen her there since her mother died." Esposito informed her a little frustrated because he knew exactly that this wasn't helpful.

"So we've got no lead of where to find her..." Beckett stated.

"Seems so... Ryan and I will look around Morrison's place again, maybe we'll find something we've missed yesterday." that was the only thing they could do and hopefully they really had missed something, after all they'd been pretty occupied with Crystal being in the appartement searching for this picture she'd mentioned during interrogation.

"Okay do that. I'll come to the precinct a little later today, there might be another lead." Beckett knew that Alexis' boyfriend was now the only one who might be able to bring to light what exactly Morrison was killed for. Of course thinking about the fact that he'd helped Ethan getting away from his addiction she knew that it probably had something to do with drugs but you could never be too certain.

"See ya." Esposito said and ended the call.

"Morning..." Castle's voice sounded from behind her.

"You're awake." she turned around not having heard him enter the room before.

"The bed was so cold without you lying next to me..." he said smiling.

"Castle I've been only gone for about two minutes." she raised an eyebrow at him, this man was unbelievable.

"And that were two minutes too long..." he slowly made his way over to her the slight smile still on his lips and pulled her on for a long slow kiss.

"I'm guessing I can't talk you into coming back to bed?" he asked innocently when they parted although he already knew the answer before his girlfriend shook her head.

"The boys found something?" he asked.

"No, Crystal Brooks is nowhere to be found and so our only chance to find out what happened is to talk to the person, who needed Morrison's help..." she explained.

"And who's this person?" Castle obviously didn't understand what she was indicating and then she remembered over their fight she hadn't thought of telling him how the photo of Alexis and Ethan fit into their case.

"The guy from the photo... Alexis' friend..." somehow she was a little afraid to bring that topic up again after they'd fought over it the previous evening.

"So we're going to Columbia?" he rose his eyebrows on surprise.

"Yes. Besides you might want to talk to Alexis after... well after what I told you yesterday." she said purposefully looking away so she wouldn't see if Castle's eyes still showed what he'd felt yesterday when talking about this topic.

"Right... I probably should..." it seemed as if he hadn't thought about what to tell his daughter yet.

"So then let's get dressed." she walked around him and into the bedroom again.

"I kind of like what you're wearing right now..." he said in a husky voice eying het hips swaying. Did she do that on purpose just to get him all turned on? He guessed not because why else would she look at him over her shoulder as if she wanted to shoot him? Then he decided to follow her and get ready to drive to Columbia so they could talk to this guy... and Alexis.

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**So again tell me what you thought of this chapter in a little review so writing the next one will be as easy as it was with this. **


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: I actually planned on updating at least once a week and I know it's been a while longer since the last chapter but I'm really sorry. I was sick and couldn't write and afterwards there was school to concentrate on but now finally I found time to write :)**

**Hope you enjoy this chapter ;)**

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Just a little while later Castle stood in front of his daughter's room and had still no clue what exactly he was going to tell her. Well best way to find out was to just knock and jump right into the situation.

"Dad..." Alexis seemed irritated when she opened the door, sure she'd expected her dad to turn up on her doorstep but not until some time later that day.

"Hey pumpkin..." he smiled nervously. Great so seeing his daughter didn't bring up any clever words to say either. And he wanted to be a successful bestselling author?

"I... I figured you'd come but... it's rather early..." she started to explain her reaction, which, yes, might be explained best by the term "completely and utterly shocked".

"I know... but we need to have this conversation really badly." he told her to somehow get started with what he had but still didn't know to say.

"So you want to come in?" she realized that she'd let him stand in the hallway and stepped aside to give her dad the opportunity to step into the little room.

"Sure..." he nodded slightly when he made is way over to the chair at his daughter's desk. His mind was still spinning around what was best to say in this situation. Remembering his own youth he couldn't deny that there had been a few mistakes pretty similar to those her daughter's friend had done, so what was he supposed to say? He'd never been good at this...

"I guess Beckett told you then?" Alexis asked slowly while sitting down on her bed.

"Yes she did, she told me everything..." he searched his daughter's eyes but she avoided his gaze. Of course he'd imagined her being a little nervous and maybe ashamed about the fact Beckett had told him but couldn't she even stand his eyes?

"Everything?" her voice was high and Castle wasn't sure if he might have heard also a little bit of desperation in it but it would have fitted to her stiffening.

"Yes, about you knowing Daniel Morrison and this photo with the drugs..." he started.

"Listen Dad, I can explain..." finally she looked at him again.

"No need to, Beckett told me you've said that you've never taken those drugs and she believes you, so I guess I can do too." That was a good start wasn't it? He assured her she had no need to explain herself and that she wasn't in any trouble, the perfect foundation for talking some sense into her. That's what he's supposed to do right?

"Thanks... Dad..." she smiled having obviously not expected her dad to be that calm when talking about it.

"But still I have to say I don't approve of you hanging out with this guy. He seems to be bad news... and I don't want to see you getting into trouble." he said seriously, looking Alexis deep in the eyes to erase any doubt that he still might be okay with who his daughter was spending her time with.

"Ethan's a nice Boy, who used to have a problem with drugs but he's clean now. Dad he deserves a second chance, only because he made a few mistakes doesn't necessarily have to mean that he shouldn't get the chance to live without being reminded of those mistakes..." she explained passionately.

"Well of course he should get a second chance but... it's just I'd feel much more comfortable if he loved his drug-free life far away from you." Castle was frustrated because he knew exactly how right she was.

"But he doesn't Dad and I'm afraid there's nothing you can do about it..." she stated.

"Oh I could just..." he suggested.

"No Dad, you won't tell my boyfriend to stay away from me!" she exclaimed shocked at her father's idea.

"Your boyfriend? You and this druggie..." to say Castle was shocked didn't really describe what he felt. He hadn't known that and even if the thought had occurred to him before he still would've been devastated.

"His name's Ethan and he is no druggie Dad. I really like him..." she explained patiently.

"Still I don't like him..." Castle pouted like a seven-year old, who didn't got the toy he wanted so badly.

"Maybe if you'd know him..." Alexis tried.

"Doubt that..." he could definitely use some cheering up, preferably in form from his daughter breaking up with that guy.

"Well like I said there's nothing you can do about him. And although I'd like to keep talking to you I've got classes to get to." she had enough of her father's nonsense.

"Well I guess I should get going, Beckett will probably already be waiting for me so we can bring your friend in for interrogation." he said while walking towards the door.

"You're taking Ethan to the precinct?" she seemed puzzled.

"Yes." he turned around to look at his daughter.

"Then I'm coming with you." she grabbed her purse and keys.

"But you've got classes..." now it was his turn to be puzzled.

"Doesn't matter." she said simply walking towards him.

"But Beckett won't let you..." he started an attempt to stop her.

"Well I give a shit about what Beckett will or won't let me do, I'm coming with you!" and with that she was out of the door.

* * *

Against Castle's hoping Beckett didn't argue with Alexis but just let her come with them.

Of course she did, why wouldn't she? If Alexis wanted to accompany her boyfriend Kate wasn't going to forbid it, suspects often had someone waiting for them outside the interrogation room so why shouldn't Ethan get to?

"Why did you let her come with him?" Castle asked when they finally arrived at the precinct and his daughter and her boyfriend were out of earshot.

"Why wouldn't I?" Beckett didn't really see the problem he seemed to have.

"Because he's bad news and she shouldn't be encouraged to spend time with him." he stated as if it was the most obvious thing on earth.

"It's none of my business who she meets, I have no say in that, she's not my daughter. And besides you don't have a say either, Alexis is a grown woman. She makes her own decisions." she explained to him. Why couldn't he just let Alexis live her live and find out for herself what's right and what's wrong?

"You're on her side?" he gaped at her in shock. Beckett was his girlfriend, she was supposed to be on his side. He could have used her back up on this.

"There are no sides Castle. You should just accept her making her own mistakes..." she actually couldn't believe how determined he was to get his daughter to stop seeing the boy. And why was it so important to him that she was on his side?

"So you also think this guy isn't good for her." that's what she'd indicated right? He wasn't wrong, was he?

"That's not what I meant." she frowned. How could he read that into her words? Okay thinking of it, it wasn't too hard to see that on her words. But who was she to judge? She had also done a few terrible mistakes, especially concerning men. Oh yes she'd made some poor choices in her past but right now wasn't the time to discuss that.

"But you said it." he pointed out smiling triumphantly.

"Just sit with Alexis in the break room, I don't think Ethan will want you being in on his interrogation." Beckett rolled her eyes in her typical manner. Sometimes he could be such a man-child, but a really lovely one.

"Since when do we care whether the suspect wants me in there?" he asked frowning.

"Okay let me put it this way,I don't want you in there. You'd just be Alexis' protective dad and not the least objective." she made clear giving her boyfriend a sympathetic look together with the smile he loved so much.

"What's wrong with protective dad?" he didn't get it, or maybe he just didn't want to get it? Yes that's it, he didn't want to understand why he would be out of place.

"Nothing as long as you stay out of the interrogation room." and then she turned around and walked into the interrogation room, in which Ethan was already waiting.

The boy looked up hopefully when she entered the room. He seemed to be very uncomfortable sitting there at the table but he visibly relaxed when it was just Beckett coming to interrogate him.

"Ethan, you know why you're here?" Kate asked as she sat down opposite of him.

"I think I do..." he said slowly, apparently thinking about what exactly he could tell Beckett without getting into trouble. After all it wouldn't be really clever of him to mention the drugs, he was talking to the police.

"You're here to tell me something about your connection to Daniel Morrison." she clarified when the boy didn't say anything else and just looked at her.

"I barely knew him..." he tried to talk himself out of it so he wouldn't have to stay any longer at the precinct. There were a few things he'd rather do than spending his time answering questions about Morrison and the circumstances of his death.

"We know he helped you get away from the drugs..." she said simply, eying Alexis' boyfriend carefully.

"What..." he started shocked by Beckett's sudden revelation.

"Don't worry, we're not interested in the drugs. We're the homicide department, you've got nothing to be afraid of, you won't be punished." she saw the fear in his eyes and reassured him.

"Okay..." he said slowly as if he needed to consider if she was telling the truth.

"So help me to understand this, what exactly did he do to help you?" she started the interrogation.

Hopefully the boy would tell her the truth and she would soon be able to close this case. Because if he couldn't or maybe even didn't want to help them they had no clue where to go on with the investigation and that would mean they'd possibly need to talk to Crystal Brooks again. But that would be a little difficult regarding the fact that she seemed to have disappeared from the face of earth, besides Beckett wasn't really thrilled about the thought of having to talk to the arrogant girl again.

"He had my back when I wanted to stop with those drugs... supported my decision..." Ethan explained.

"Did he get into contact with an angry dealer? Someone he might have pissed off by helping you getting clean?" she asked further.

"I... I don't know... no there was no dealer that met him... at least I don't think so..." he answered a little too nervously for Beckett's thinking.

"You're sure?" she asked again.

"Yes... I'm sure he didn't meet a dealer." he said a little more convincingly.

"Okay, if you remember anything that might be important don't hesitate to call." there was nothing else she could do, of the boy wasn't ready to talk she could only hope that he soon would be and would call them.

"Does that mean I can go now?" he looked at her hopefully.

"Yes, you're free to go." she gave him a little smile to reassure him that she was on his side and that he could talk to her if anything important about the case came up. And before Beckett could say another word Ethan was out the door leaving her alone in the interrogation room. So it looked like their only chance to move forward with the case was to find Crystal and talk to her again, even if Beckett didn't like it.

"This boy didn't tell you the whole story." Castle came into the room and closed the door behind him.

"I know but can I do? If I push him to talk he might shut down completely..." Beckett explained after she overcame her surprise about Castle suddenly appearing in the room.

"He was nervous, I saw it." he said as if he hadn't heard what she just said.

"He's afraid of something, or someone... but didn't I tell you to sit with Alexis in the break room?" with that she finally got his full attention.

"I thought it might be better to leave her alone... I think she's not really on good terms with me right now..." he explained.

"So you're afraid of being in the same room with her, huh?" she couldn't hide a smirk. The bestselling author Richard Castle didn't know what to say to his own daughter, a man, who earned his money with finding the right words, couldn't find them when his daughter was concerned. He was just scared of her still being mad.

"No I'm not." he started laughing kind of hysterically to hide that his girlfriend was just right about him being afraid.

"Well if you say so... come on Castle we should talk to Crystal Brooks again." she said getting up and walking past him out of the room.

Although Castle's fear of facing his daughter again was a welcome distraction for Beckett, she was more than pissed by the thought of having to deal with Crystal again. Kate would more than love to just put this girl behind bars, that way she would probably get some respect and manners.

Good thing that she knew about the girl's background now and because of that knew for sure that holding her for 24 hours wouldn't bring any rich parents with their star lawyer to the surface. But actually it wasn't really typical for Beckett to just keep the girl in custody when there was nothing indicating her being responsible for Morrison's death.

She just had to stay calm and talk to the girl, after all she was just a young woman, an annoying young woman indeed but still an innocent girl. And maybe Esposito and Ryan found something in Morrison's appartement that they'd missed the day before and talking to Chris wouldn't be necessary anymore, you should never give up hope, right?

"Dad?" Alexis suddenly walked over to Beckett's desk where she and Castle were sitting by now.

"Alexis..." Castle said surprised, he hadn't really thought his daughter would want to talk to him after their conversation at the dorm.

"I just wanted to tell you that I'm not mad at you anymore..." she told him smiling slightly.

"That's great to hear." he stood up and walked a few feet away with his daughter so they could talk in private without Beckett hearing everything. Not that he would mind but maybe Alexis would feel more comfortable this way.

"I hope you understand that I needed to come with Ethan..." Alexis went on.

"Well... actually I don't..." Castle said slowly.

"Wouldn't you do the same for Beckett?" she asked irritated.

Her father was too puzzled by her sudden question, if she compared her relationship with this boy to the relationship he had with Beckett that would mean Alexis really loved this Ethan. God his daughter was really in love with a drug addict. Unfortunately for him his silence seemed like him being unsure of the answer to Alexis' question, which made her look at him in disbelief.

But what was even more unfortunately was the fact that he didn't went far enough away and that his girlfriend could hear every single word they spoke. She really tried not to listen but failed when Alexis spat out that question. And so she was also staring in disbelief, only she was staring at the papers lying on her desk so neither Alexis nor Castle would notice her listening.

What the hell was he thinking of? Why wasn't he replying with a clear 'yes' as soon as the question was out there? What for god's sake was he waiting of? Not that she was afraid he wouldn't want to support her in every possible situation life will come up with, no she wasn't afraid at all. Of course he wanted to, he loved her and the previous evening was proof enough but still, hearing him say it would be nice. So what was he waiting for?

"Ehhr... yes...yes I'd do the same thing for Beckett." he finally said.

"See? So you understand..." she smiled pleased with herself, she'd made her feelings clear to her dad.

"Kind of..." Beckett could hear in his voice that he still didn't fully understand but tried his best to.

"I've got to go now, there are a few classes I should better attend..." she gave her dad a kiss on the cheek.

"Of course, bye pumpkin." he smiled as she walked away.

"Oh and thanks for staying out of Ethan's interrogation, that was really nice of you." she turned around again.

"Oh no problem, I thought he might feel a little more comfortable when his girlfriend's father isn't in the interrogation room with him." Castle smiled at her pleased that it had been the right thing to just observe the interrogation.

"Yes he told me he was kind of relieved but now I really need to go, bye." and with that Alexis was gone, leaving Beckett sitting open-mouthed at her desk staring at Castle. Did he really just pretend it was his idea to stay out of the interrogation? That was so typical, he just had to adorn himself with borrowed plumes.

* * *

**So what do you think of this chapter? What would you like to see in the next one? Should I let Chris appear again or maybe Beckett and Castle should find out what Ethan was hiding? Or maybe both? :D Just tell me in a review what you think so writing the next chapter won't take too long and I can update soon :)**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: So I actually didn't plan on writing the first scene of this chapter but I decided to add it to make clear that Alexis knew about the drugs. I thought that it became clear in Kate's conversation with Alexis (in Chapter 5 I think it was) but in case it didn't I wanted to make it clear with this ;)  
But now enjoy reading :)**

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When Alexis got into the elevator with Ethan following her she felt relieved. She hadn't even realized how nervous she'd been about her boyfriend being interrogated until she'd sat in the break room not knowing what was going on. Not only the fact that Beckett knew about Ethan and the drugs but also that her dad would meet her boyfriend had bugged her.

Of course somehow she'd known Beckett wouldn't let her dad go ballistic on Ethan but the thing with the drugs was still out there. She'd wondered what Beckett would do about that and when Ethan finally came into the break room telling her he was off the hook for the drugs and that her dad hadn't been in the room during the interrogation she'd finally been able to breathe again.

"That was really nice of the detective... you know to ignore my possession of drugs..." he suddenly interrupted her thoughts.

"I guess she's more interested in solving their murder case... and besides you don't use drugs anymore, right?" she told him smiling.

"Right..." he agreed a little hesitantly but Alexis didn't notice, she was in her own perfect world where she looked forward to a future with the cute guy standing next to her at the moment and without any illegal substances.

* * *

"So it was your idea to stay out of his interrogation, huh?" she smirked teasingly at him when he sat down again on the chair next to her desk.

"You... you heard us?" he didn't knew what to reply to that.

"Yes Castle, might want to go a little further away the next time." she went on teasingly.

"I... ehhr..." he searched for the right words to explain.

"No need to worry, I'm just teasing you. Thought I lighten the mood a little." she smiled at him reassuringly.

"Lighten the mood?" he asked frowning.

"Yes cheer you up a little... you know, as you always try." she explained.

"I can't be cheered up..." he mumbled wearily as he looked towards the elevator his daughter and her boyfriend had disappeared in.

"Seriously, you're that upset about the thing with Alexis?" she hadn't expected that. Of course she'd thought he would be upset about the whole drug thing, which patent wouldn't be in this situation, but that he was this upset didn't really fit into her view of everything they'd found out.

"Of course I am, she's my daughter." he stated indignantly, the look he gave her was partly shocked and partly hostile. How could she even ask?

"Yes and your daughter is almost 19." she replied ignoring his look.

"Still she's my daughter. I worry about her well-being, that's what parents do, no matter how old their children are." he was irritated, was Kate really that insensitive? He couldn't imagine her to be, she was always so sensitive when talking ti the relatives of victims, there was no way she could be that insensitive in this situation, was there?

"I understand that, but..." she started to explain but was interrupted before she could say another word.

"No offence Kate but it doesn't seem like you do... you expect me to just keep cool and let my daughter head straight towards her ruin." he tried his best to keep his voice in control because he didn't want to fight, they'd already fought enough the previous evening, but this was about his daughter, so he had to talk to Beckett about this.

"No Rick, I get it. You're afraid she'll get into or already is in huge trouble. Even though I'm not a parent I understand your worries but you're a little over thinking this." she told him calmly as she reached for his hand.

"Why am I over thinking this?" now he was at a complete loss of words, how could she hold his hand and look him straight in the eyes when telling him he was thinking too much about this? Had he been so wrong to think Kate could understand?

"On that photo she wasn't the one taking the cocaine, it was Ethan and when I asked her she swore she had never tried out any drugs, do you think she lies? Because I'm pretty sure she doesn't, in all those years I've been a detective now I met more people, who were addicted to all sorts of drugs, than I can count and experience tells me your daughter did not touch those drugs." she looked him deep in the eyes hoping she would reach his common sense.

She was a detective, it was her job to see what no one else did. He'd always trusted her judgement, until now. She understood that it might be a little harder to do so now that it was about his daughter but she'd hoped he would manage to trust her, even in this special situation. But apparently he couldn't and she couldn't blame him. Maybe she'd been a little too naïve in her thinking.

"But her boyfriend did, the person she apparently loves more than most things in her life did indeed take drugs. The photo proofs it." he exclaimed desperately.

"You're right, he did but he also wanted to get clean, he turned to our victim for help. So doesn't that show his goodwill? Besides Alexis is intelligent and responsible you should be able to trust her to be strong and to stay away from drugs even if people around her don't." she was talking to his common sense.

"Why is it so important to you that I trust her to do the right thing?" he suddenly asked.

"Because if you go on worrying like this, although nothing acute threatening happened, you're hurting and I can't just watch you being in pain. I care for you too much, I want to help you, take your pain away... but I'm at a loss here Rick, I don't know what to do to help. There most likely is nothing that I can do so the only thing I left for me to do is try to reach your common sense to stop you from hurting yourself with all those worries that picture brought up." she lay here heart out there, told him what was driving her, staring down the whole time.

She hadn't expected to show him her own insecurities right here, sitting in the precinct, the place where she should be strong and not let her own vulnerability show. She'd just adapt to voice her feelings when they were in a save place, his loft or her appartement usually, but now here in the middle of the precinct where anyone could have heard her? She was really making progress, Dr. Burke would be proud of her.

Castle didn't say anything, he could just stare at her knowing only too well how much it must have taken from her to admit her feelings in the middle of her workplace. He couldn't stop wondering what a long way they'd come, four years ago they'd been barely able to be in the same room without arguing over the most stupid things, then they'd somehow found their rhythm and became real partners, teasing and caring for each other.

And somehow along the way they even became more than partners, he couldn't tell when exactly but that actually didn't matter, what mattered was that they became so much more than only partners, they fell for each other harder than either one of them had before for someone. They nearly died in each other's arms frozen, were nearly blown up by a bomb, almost drowned in the Hudson, and all that while they fell more and more in love with each minute they spend together until it all culminated in their first beautiful night spend together.

He was in awe of the woman he could call his girlfriend now, she'd always been so strong and didn't show her vulnerability and now he had her sitting in front of him, pouring her heart out in the place she was normally a bad-ass cop. Yes they'd really come a long way, she'd come a long way.

Slowly, scared he didn't understand, she gathered the courage to look up at him and face his reaction but when she saw the love in his eyes she knew her words had reached him. It felt like a huge weight had been lifted off of her shoulders, as if telling him how she felt in this situation was a coup, she'd never thought telling your partner straight to his face how you feel could be this relieving but Dr. Burke had been right, it was.

"Castle... please say something..." she begged to hear him confirm what she already saw in his bright blue eyes.

"You're right, nothing threatening happened..." he admitted still thinking about how his worrying had also affected and pained her. He could only remember too well how much it had pained himself every time she'd been hurt be it during investigating her mother's case or her private life when things didn't turn out as she'd wanted. All he'd thought about was how to take her pain away, so who would he be to not understand her dilemma?

"Maybe I tried a little too hard to stop you from worrying..." she voiced her thoughts.

"No. No you didn't, I completely understand why you did it. I'd probably have acted the same way." he squeezed her hand and gave her a reassuring smile that made her feel a little less bad about her behavior, which as she had to admit wasn't really ideal in this situation. She'd just been caring about herself and hadn't even wasted a single thought on how her actions would seem to someone oblivious to her feelings. Somehow this non-thinking was a common thread throughout her whole life but before she could dwell in this thought any longer her phone started ringing.

"Might want to get that." Castle said smiling when she didn't react right away.

"Ehhr... sure." was her reply when she finally arrived back in reality with her thoughts and grabbed the phone.

"Beckett." she said into it.

"Yo Beckett we actually missed something yesterday." Esposito's voice came from the other end.

"What did you find?" she asked grateful for the newly found evidence that could possibly lead them to their perp.

"A pretty interesting letter... someone threatened our victim." her colleague informed her.

"Oh really? Where did you find that letter?" why hadn't they found it before? The whole appartement had been searched yesterday.

"It was hidden under the mattress of his bed, We must have missed it." he sounded a little guilty about the fact that he apparently didn't do his job well enough the day before but at least now they had a new lead.

"And do we know who send the letter?" Beckett asked being the amazing cop again.

"I'd say a pretty angry drug lord. Apparently Morrison was responsible for his best drug dealer to quit." Esposito informed her matter of factly.

"That's interesting..." that was really interesting considering the fact that they knew Morrison had been helping Ethan the last few weeks. So was Alexis' boyfriend this drug dealer? It would explain why he seemed to be afraid of someone and why he'd hesitated when she'd asked if an angry drug dealer was in the picture and a possible murderer. Okay so she had to interrogate Ethan again, maybe he would become weak and start talking.

"We'll look around here some more, bye." the detective told Beckett and ended the call.

"So what's interesting?" Castle immediately asked when she placed the phone back on her desk.

"We might have to talk to Ethan again... and Alexis." she told him realizing that there was no way his daughter could be kept out of this, she had to have seen something that was part of his drug dealing, be it someone Ethan met with or a date in his calendar. Hard to imagine she didn't, although Kate didn't think Alexis would have realized to what extend her boyfriend was into drugs, after all he most certainly didn't sell the drugs with her standing next to him. Kate eyed her boyfriend carefully knowing he would want to know exactly why they needed to talk to the two again.

"It looks like Ryan and Esposito just found out why the boy was so nervous. Morrison helped a drug dealer to quit his job, which obviously didn't fit into some drug lord's plan..." she went on explaining.

"And you think this drug dealer's Ethan." he finished her sentence and received a nod from Kate.

"So when we get Ethan to talk we might find our killer..." again she confirmed his conclusion with a nod.

"Is it just me or did this whole thing with Alexis just get more serious?" he asked as his mind started spinning around the consequences this new piece of information brought with itself.

"I'm afraid it does..." that was exactly the same thought that stroke her once she realized she would have to talk to his daughter again too.

"What does this mean for her?" he was back at being the worried father but now both, he and Kate, knew it wasn't without a damn good reason.

"Castle..." she started not wanting to tell him her professional opinion as a cop.

"Just tell me, I can deal with it." he assured her but neither of them believed his words.

"If Ethan really is this dealer and his boss is the one responsible for the death of Daniel Morrison, that would mean there's a dangerous killer out there who'll stop at nothing to achieve what he wants..." she stopped to look Castle right in the eyes.

"Are you indicating that..." he'd already feared that she would say something like that.

"Yes, if Ethan will try to quit working for this man again or if Alexis supports his drug-free life too much she might be in danger." she replied quietly watching as the full extend of the situation slowly dawned him. He looked even more worried than before and the worst thing was she knew there was more than a good reason to do so.

"I'm so sorry Castle..." she whispered as she watched him pressing his lips together so they wouldn't start trembling from the desperation and helplessness.

"We have to keep her save." he whispered finally looking at Kate for help.

"I know..." she took both his hands into her own and rubbed soothingly over the back of his hands. He seemed so incredibly devastated that it almost broke her heart, she would have to keep the girl save, there was no other option because if Alexis was harmed in all of this Castle's whole world would be shattered and that was something she couldn't live with.

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**Now please let me know what you think :) Writing gets easier with every review I receive :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N: I know I've been bad at updating lately but I've been pretty bussy with the last two weeks of my going to school (yay!) I hope you can forgive me ;) Now on with the story :)**

* * *

She sat there just holding his hands for god knows how long, silently comforting him because she didn't know what to say. Which words would be the right ones in this situation? She felt bad for him and wanted to do her best to help him get through this but somehow it felt as if every word she'd say was a word too much. But she knew he didn't need her to say anything, their silent communication was enough.

"She doesn't know..." he suddenly said looking down and shaking his head slightly as if he could shake away any thought telling him elsewise.

"What?" Beckett was startled by his sudden words. "She doesn't know he's selling drugs, I'm sure. If she knew she wouldn't meet him, she's a good girl, she'd come to me if she knew." he said again to convince himself of his daughter's innocence. Thinking anything else would have driven him mad.

"I'm sure you're right." the hell she was, there was a possibility Alexis knew about her boyfriend's drug business but, although it wasn't that far off, she never would have told him that. He looked so scared and helpless as he sat there in his usual place.

Silence fell above the couple again when both were deep in their own thoughts again. Castle was still trying his best to convince himself of his daughter's innocence and sense of responsibility as well as he tried to avoid thinking about all the things that could happen to Alexis due to her boyfriend's lack of common sense.

Seriously who was stupid enough to get involved with a cold blooded drug king? Apparently thinking was not one of Ethan's many qualities his daughter could have fallen in love with. Because this definitely showed the guy wasn't the brightest, didn't it? Alexis was so much more intelligent than that and therefore far out of Ethan's league.

At the same time Beckett was contemplating which way would be best to approach Ethan again. He'd seemed to be scared of someone when she'd talked to him earlier that day, so why should he suddenly trust her with the truth that might get him in life threatening danger? She could only hope that he'd break once she made him clear in which danger he was putting his girlfriend.

"So why don't we drive to Columbia again and see if Ethan's willing to help us now. Make sure Alexis is okay." she suggested after some time had passed.

"Mmh..." he mumbled and nodded at her.

"Seeing Alexis will calm your nerves..." she told him lying a Hand on his shoulder as a reassuring gesture because she knew that even though it hadn't been an hour since he'd seen his daughter the worries about Alexis' safety were killing him and now she could understand him without any doubt. Castle smiled at her endeavor and followed her into the elevator to finally get to Columbia and therefore to his little girl he hoped wasn't in the cross-hairs yet.

* * *

When they reached the college Castle couldn't wait any longer to see with his own eyes that his daughter was still fine, just like she'd been at the precinct. So as soon as Beckett stopped the car he was out the door and heading towards the dorms.

"Castle!" she yelled but he didn't hear her, he wasn't paying attention to anything but the nearest way to his daughter's room.

Kate knew he was worried sick about everything that could happen to Alexis and that his only desire right now was to see his unharmed daughter. She could really understand this need. actually she kind of felt it too. Even though Alexis wasn't her own daughter and they got to know each other just four years ago when she also met Castle, Kate had already gotten to care for the girl. Just like Castle his daughter had found her way into Beckett's heart. Must be the name, she thought before hurrying after her boyfriend.

He was way ahead of her and out of her sight, only when she rounded the corner towards the hallway, which she knew lead to the girl's room she saw him standing in front of the door knocking. He seemed to be more desperate than before and Beckett could sense his rising fear, which was also evident in his eyes when he turned towards her hearing her heels click on the ground.

"She's not opening, Kate. God, something happened to her. We're too late she's..." he exclaimed panicking with tears in his eyes. He was about to get a full panic attack and hyperventilating, his writer mind getting the better of him.

"Hey, breath Castle." she said rushing towards him until she stood on front of him and was able to hold him by his arms looking him deep into the eyes.

"It's okay, didn't she mention having classes?" she tried to comfort him, being pretty sure she'd heard Alexis telling him this.

"Did she? I... yes... yes she did, right?" he frowned but then seemed to remember and relief washed over his face as he realized his daughter most likely wasn't harmed.

"I think I remember her saying something like that, so just calm down, she's probably just in class." Kate gave him a reassuring smile, hoping she was right and the girl was really in class and hadn't been kidnapped on her way there or worse.

"Right." he nodded as her words slowly sank in. "So come on, let's find out where to find her so we can see her." she turned around taking his hand and started walking back the way she'd come.

Castle just walked beside her calming down a little but not completely, he still had to see her first before lying his worries to rest, well almost to rest. He would still worry no matter what the conversation with her and Ethan would bring to the light, after all there was still a cruel killer out there and even if they'd catch him, who knew if this drug boss Ethan was working for wouldn't get another one to go after Alexis?No he definitely wouldn't stop completely to worry, even if there were police men protecting her. After all they also were just humans, they also could get killed, Kate was the perfect example for it, she'd nearly died because of a bullet she couldn't have seen coming. But no, he wouldn't go there now, he wouldn't go to that dark place in which he once more felt the pain of seeing her life drain out of her body while lying in his arms.

"And what about Ethan?" he suddenly asked realizing she'd said they'd see her, they, not only him. She was coming with him not letting him meet his daughter while she was talking to Ethan so they'd finally get what they needed to close the case, they'd go together to see Alexis.

"First we'll make sure your daughter's okay, afterwards we can deal with finding him, he won't just disappear." she squeezed his hand and smiled. There was no way she would let him go alone to meet Alexis, not only because she knew how much he needed her at her side when he's so afraid but also because she deeply cared for the girl herself, she wouldn't let it show but Alexis being in the cross-hairs scared her, still, Castle needed her to be strong so he could lean onto her and therefore she couldn't afford letting her feelings become obvious.

"Thank you." he whispered amazed by how much she apparently cared for his daughter too. Words couldn't describe how much love he felt for her at that moment.

"Always." she just replied looking him deep in the eyes silently promising to stay by his side no matter what.

* * *

When they'd finally found out where Alexis should be Castle was eager to burst right into class and drag her out of the room to keep her save and not out of sight. Again they were walking down a hallway but this time with doors to both of their sides that lead into various classrooms.

"So that's the room, right?" Castle suddenly stopped in front of a door looking at Beckett to confirm his assumption.

"I suppose..." she said slowly checking the room number, which was the same they'd been told to look for. Castle was already reaching for the doorknob not wanting to wait any longer for the truth about his daughter's state.

"Wait Castle, they said her class ends in about five minutes. We should probably wait..." she held him back stepping between him and the door.

"But what if she's not in there? What if she's somewhere else because we're too late?" the fear was still present in his eyes as well as in his voice. The only thing spending him comfort would be going into that room and seeing that his little girl hadn't been hurt, that she was still alive and her bubbly self.

"She'd just come here an hour ago or so, I actually doubt something happened to her yet." she said not only to comfort him and give him hope but also because she really believed in her words. This drug boss already send Ethan a message by killing the one person supporting him in turning his life around.

"But I have to see her..." he started again desperately.

"And you will, just wait. Think about how embarrassing it would be for her if her dad burst into class just to see her. I understand your reasons but would she?" Kate didn't want Castle to get upset by his daughter's reaction to him interrupting her class just like that because sure as hell Alexis wouldn't fling her arms around his neck happy to see him. Of course she was responsible and understanding, after all it was Alexis Castle the girl who on occasion had had to be the most responsible person in the loft, but still she was also a teenager and those were known for hating almost everything their parents do in front of their friends.

"I... I don't know..." thinking about it he supposed that Kate might be right but this was still his child he was concerned about.

"It's only two more minutes..." she grabbed his hand and smiled at him hoping her optimism would give him hope.

They stood there silently waiting for the door finally to open. Somehow the few minutes felt like a lifetime leading to Beckett thinking about the possibility that she was wrong, that against her objective opinion as a detective his daughter already was hurt? No that was unlikely, who would be stupid enough to fight a cold blooded drug boss once again within 48 hours after the death of the only person who helped you, right? At least she hoped Ethan wouldn't be that stupid and putting Alexis in danger.

"I'll let two junior detectives come to protect her." she said after what felt like an eternity although it probably had just been a minute.

"Thank you." he smiled at her, grateful that she understood how important his daughter's safety was to him. Just looking at the facts there was no real evidence that the killer would come after Alexis, he might as well come for Ethan himself or another person the boy cared about, so Beckett actually didn't have to put his daughter under protection he realized.

"You can go home with her, you know you don't have to stick around. Keeping an eye on your daughter is more important than shadowing on this case." she told him just in case he was wondering how she'd react to him rather be at his daughter's side for the rest of the day.

"God I really don't want to leave her out of my eyes..." he admitted panicking again as he thought about it again.

"Then don't." she said confidently and in that moment the door opened and a stream of students rushed out of the room.

"Alexis!" Castle exclaimed relived when he saw her and hugged her tightly, wishing to never have to let go of her again.

"Dad?" her surprise was evident in her voice and she looked at the two adults a little irritated.

"Thank god you're okay!" her father didn't even realize that apparently his daughter wasn't as pleased to see him as he was and also her look screaming 'what the hell is going on?' went unnoticed by him.

"Of course, why wouldn't I?" she asked puzzled when her father made no effort to answer her unspoken question.

"We might want to discuss that somewhere more private..." Beckett chipped in pointing at all the people surrounding them.

"Right..." Castle said after the first wave of relief had passed suddenly realizing they weren't alone in the hallway.

"I guess you won't take an 'I've got classes' as an excuse for not wanting to talk right now?" Alexis asked already knowing the answer. There must be some serious stuff going on, otherwise they wouldn't be here. It had only been about what, two hours since she'd left the precinct? So yes there had to be something really important.

"No, we definitely have to talk, now." Castle insisted, giving her the answer she'd already known would come.

"Well then I think we could just go to my room... provided you're telling me what is going on here." she looked from her dad over to Beckett and back again. Did this have something to do with the drugs Ethan had been taking? She'd already assured them he wasn't doing that anymore, so why did they make such a huge thing out of it?

"We'll explain everything once no one can overhear our conversation." Kate nodded promising the girl that she'll get to know everything as soon as they were out of the crowded hallway. And with that Alexis lead them towards the dorm so her dad and Beckett had the privacy they wanted for talking to her. On their way the three of them ran into their potential drug dealer.

"Hey Al..." Ethan stopped mid sentence as his eyes landed on Castle and Beckett, who were following the red-head.

"Detective... Mr. Castle..." he stammered somewhat unsure of what to say.

"We're just heading to the dorm to talk about something, which apparently can't wait any longer..." Alexis explained when she was cut off by Kate. who was again in full detective mode.

"Yes and maybe you should join us." she said eying him intently and making clear that it wasn't open for discussion whether he was coming with them or not. The boy didn't even try to fight her on this and just followed them until they were all in Alexis little room.

"Care to explain what's going on here?" the girl asked as soon as the door had been closed.

"Why don't you tell us, Ethan?" Beckett looked towards the boy.

"I... I don't know what you're talking about." he said perplexed.

"Oh shall I help you remember?" Castle almost yelled at him. This boy was the reason his precious daughter was in danger and he couldn't stand the boy pretending as if he was clueless to everything that happened.

"Dad!" Alexis yelled shocked about her father's outburst.

"Calm down Castle." Kate was calm, she knew he was angry and hated the boy for what he'd done. She understood that controlling his anger wasn't possible in that situation but still he should at least try to stay calm, for his daughter's sake because she still didn't know what all this was about.

"Wha... I..." the boy stammered scared of his girlfriend's father.

"Ethan we know Daniel Morrison received threats because of what he did." Beckett told him to jog his memory.

"Ehhr... I... I didn't know that." he slowly averted his eyes from Castle and turned to look at Beckett but he still seemed to be afraid that Castle would suddenly jump up and attack him out of his rage.

"Really? Let me guess you didn't know that you weren't only taking drugs but also selling them either?" his anger hadn't vanished but at least he had his voice under control and wasn't yelling, now it was more like snapping.

"Dad, he's no drug dealer! He made a mistake taking drugs but he'd never sold them, right?" Alexis was still shocked at how her father was acting and looked to her boyfriend for confirmation but he just stood there not moving the slightest bit and looked down at the floor.

"Ethan we know that Morrison was killed because he wanted to help you get out of the business, you know who's behind all of this." Beckett told him when he didn't try to defend himself against Castle's accusations.

"I... It's..." the boy found his voice again but didn't really know what to say.

"Are they right? Were you selling drugs?" Alexis asked astonished and hurt.

"I'm sorry..." was all he mumbled.

"But you're still selling right?" Castle clarified so his daughter would know the full extend of her boyfriend's involvement in drugs.

"What? But you said you were clean?" she felt betrayed, Ethan had lief to her about the drugs, who knew what else had been a lie, maybe he wasn't even in love with her.

"I... I was afraid what he might do if I stopped... he already killed someone..." he tried to explain hoping Alexis would get his reasons but apparently failed, she couldn't understand him.

"And who's he?" Beckett asked so they would get a new lead in the case.

"No, I can't tell you, he'll kill me." Ethan shook his head vehemently, he was clearly afraid of this guy.

"Ethan, we can protect you. All you've got to do is tell me his name." she assured him hoping he would trust her.

And what followed was a long silence as Ethan was deliberating about whether to trust Beckett, tell her who's behind all this and hope he won't get killed or keeping his mouth shut to definitely stay alive.

* * *

**I thought I end it here so you would have a new update sooner, the conversation will continue next chapter (which I haven't written yet) so maybe you coud tell me what you think Ethan should do, tell them or not?  
Please tell me what you think :)**


	11. Chapter 11

"Ethan if you know who the killer is you can't just shut up and tolerate what this man did to the only person willing to help you get clean." Alexis broke the silence looking at the boy insistently.

"Oh he isn't the one killing people, he wouldn't waste time with the dirty work. He's got people doing it for him, I... I can't... at least not if I don't want to be next." Ethan explained desperately trying to get some understanding.

"We'll help you Ethan. There'll always be two uniforms accompanying you for protection..." Beckett repeated.

"My whole life?" he asked sarcastically finally finding the courage he'd searched for since he'd been interrogated.

"Until we've put the killer and the man who's behind all of this behind bars." she said ignoring his sarcastical remark.

"Then he'll just send someone else. No matter if he's in jail or not, he'll manage to get me killed." he said bitterly.

"Do you even realize in what kind of danger you're putting my daughter? Or do you realize it but simply don't care?" Castle, who'd tried everything to stay calm and not start yelling at the boy again, barked frustrated by Ethan's unwillingness to help them catch the people responsible for the murder.

Alexis shot his father an astonished look, what was her role in this story? Why was she in danger, she hadn't even known how deep her boyfriend was involved in New York's drug business until just now. Was she really in danger? She felt sick just thinking about it. Looking from her father over to Beckett for an answer to her unspoken questions it occurred to her why she might be in danger. She was close to Ethan and would be the perfect pawn if he would decide once more to not follow their instructions.

"I... what? No I'd never put Alexis into danger. Why... what makes you say that?" Ethan didn't understand a word of what Castle was talking about. Apparently he'd never thought of the possibility that Morrison had only been the start and that there could be more people around him, that are going to lose their lives because of his actions.

"If you'd decide to try get out of the business again they'd come for me..." she answered before either her dad or Beckett could say something. The realization of the place he'd put her in slowly sank in and suddenly everything made sense, Beckett and her father suddenly showing up at her class although it's barely two hours since they'd seen each other at the precinct, him holding her tight as if he was relieved she'd survived the apocalypse. He'd feared they'd already come for her, that she would be the next victim in this case the NYPD was working on.

"That's what you meant earlier when you said 'thank god you're okay' isn't it? You thought whoever's behind this murder you're investigating is coming for me now, didn't you? That's why you came." she looked into her father's eyes, which were filled with unshed tears.

He'd been in control of his feelings up to now, well at least of this kind of feelings, controlling his anger didn't work out that well but who cares, now all the tears the fear had brought with it were pooling in his eyes. Knowing that his little girl was in danger and hearing her say it out loud, telling him she'd realized it now, were two totally different things. Dealing with his own fear he was capable of but seeing the fear in Alexis' eyes and dealing with that too was more than he could take, he couldn't handle it.

"No... That's... I've never thought about it like that... I'm sorry... I... I didn't meant to... I wouldn't want anything to happen to you, I love you..." Ethan stammered shocked.

"Then talk to us, tell us who's this drug boss you're selling for. If you really love my daughter as much as you say you do you'll help us find him to keep her safe..."Castle pleaded desperately trying to stop his tears to fall but failed when he felt Kate taking hold of his hand and running soothingly circles over the back of his hand with her thumb. Feeling her standing by his side and trying her best to comfort him in this situation was better than he'd thought it would be, after everything he'd thrown at her head when they'd been fighting at his appartement the other night and during their argument back at the precinct, she was still willing to stand by his side throughout this mess.

"Ethan, I know you're scared and feel like you're signing your own death sentence by telling us who you're working for but I promise we'll protect you until you're no longer in any kind of danger." Beckett tried again to convince the boy and together with the tears slowly running down Castle's cheek it seemed to work. Ethan looked again at Alexis, who gave him a reassuring nod, and then back at the two adults before taking a deep breath to brace himself for the consequences his revelation would probably have.

"Okay I'll tell you but please, you've got to protect me from them..." he pleaded again afraid of what might happen once people got to know he was the one who'd talked. Beckett nodded looking at the boy expectantly. She was grateful for the help of the boy, it meant she had a chance on protecting Alexis and finding the killer that was still out there.

Hopefully they would be able to get justice for Daniel Morrison's death rather soon because if not, there would be too much time in which Alexis was still in danger. And in that case the look on Castle's face wouldn't change any time soon, the heartbreaking pain radiating from his eyes would stay for longer than she could bear. So no, it wasn't an option that closing this case and putting the people responsible for all of this behind bars would take much time.

"It's Hughes... Trey Hughes." he finally mumbled looking down hoping he hadn't just made a huge mistake. Beckett had expected to hear one of the famous names in New York's drug business but the name 'Hughes' didn't really rang a bell. Who was this guy?

"Trey Hughes as in the owner of The Runaway?" Alexis exclaimed shocked, it seemed as if she knew exactly who this guy was and couldn't believe either that her boyfriend had something to do with this guy or that Hughes was capable of murder.

"The Runaway?" Castle frowned and looked from his daughter over to her boyfriend for an explanation. What the hell was going on? Why did his little daughter know the guy, who, if he was really the man behind the murder of Daniel Morrison, had no consciousness and didn't even back down from killing someone to get what he wants? Castle's mind was already spinning again with all the possibilities that might explain it, the curse of being a writer. Maybe his little girl wasn't as innocent as he always liked to believe, maybe she was even more involved in the case than he'd assumed.

"Some bar a few of the guys on Campus like to go to, I think it's somewhere in midtown..." Alexis answered not bothering to look at her father. Her eyes were still locked on her boyfriend, who yet had to answer her question.

Good, so the fact that she didn't know where exactly this bar was in midtown could only mean she'd never been to it, which eased Castle's panic again.

"Okay so this guy has a bar, probably for covering his drug dealing business?" Beckett voiced her thoughts and looked quizzically at the boy in front of her.

"Yes... Hughes has this bar in midtown so no one gets suspicious of what he really does for a living... So that no one asks any questions about where all his money comes from..." he slowly averted his gaze from the floor and looked up at Beckett.

"Okay then, I'll call someone to stay with you until we found this Trey Hughes. Are you staying with him Alexis or shall I call another team to look after you?" she asked the girl.

"No it's fine, I'll be with him. I guess there's a lot to talk about..." she assured the detective and looked at Ethan with anger.

"I'll also stay pumpkin, don't want to leave you alone here..." her father informed her then.

"What? NO! You've got a case." she turned to look at him in astonishment.

"Well you're definitely more important than this case..." Castle didn't understand why him staying with her for the rest of the day was such a big deal for her.

"And that's nice Dad but you don't have to stay. I'll be fine, there'll be cops making sure nothing will happen to me and I'm not alone here..." Alexis explained hoping her father would understand.

But he just stared at her unable to say anything, what was he supposed to say to that? His little girl didn't want him there, she just wanted him to leave. That hurt.

"Alexis, I think your dad's just worried sick about you right now and it would make him feel so much better if he was near you..." Kate tried to explain when Castle didn't say anything because she could vividly imagine what was going on inside his head at that exact moment.

"I know but I'll be fine... Besides I'd like to talk to Ethan... alone, you know?" Alexis hoped both adults would understand.

First Beckett wanted to say something again but Castle surprised her when he was quicker, telling his daughter that if she wanted him to go with Beckett he would leave. Kate could hear the hurt in his voice and could see it in his whole posture, his daughter had hurt him badly. When the two of them turned to leave Alexis once more spoke to her father.

"I'm really sorry dad but how about I'll spend the next few days at the loft? Just until you've gotten this guy..." she'd also noticed what she'd done to her father and this was some sort of attempt to make him feel better. He nodded at her and a slight smile crossed his face that didn't reach his eyes, he was still too wounded by his precious little girl not wanting to have him around in this serious situation.

* * *

On their way to the car neither Beckett nor Castle said a word. He didn't feel like talking because what's the matter? It wasn't like talking it over with Beckett would change anything, his daughter would still rather be alone with Ethan than having him sitting next to her. Why did she even want to talk to this guy in the first place? Didn't she understand that her boyfriend had betrayed her? Still Alexis had chosen him over her own father, at least that's what it felt like to Castle.

At the same time Beckett would have loved to talk to him, to get an insight on his feelings, but thinking about it he didn't need to say anything for her to see right through him and knowing exactly what he felt. She knew he didn't feel like talking and so she decided to also stay silent. If he wanted to talk he would start to, pushing him wasn't the right thing to do and although she'd liked to do so, she knew better.

Both felt bad for coming here, especially considering the way their conversation with Alexis had turned out but at the end of the day they now had at least a name to connect with the murder, so considering this coming to Columbia definitely had had the effect they'd hoped for.

At some point during their way to the car Beckett called Ryan and Esposito to tell them who their new suspect was and that they needed to meet with her and Castle at this bar. Because going in there without any backup certainly wouldn't end well. They decided to meet up in front of The Runaway to go through their plan of surprising Hughes so it was more likely they'd witness some sort of illegal business that would put him behind bars even faster than they could do with Ethan's statement now. After all their whole case was depending on what the boy had told them and to be honest Beckett doubted that he would testify against Hughes. So their only way to make sure Trey Hughes would be going to jail was to find other evidence connecting him to his shady business.

"So you want to talk about it?" Beckett asked once both of them were sitting in her car driving towards midtown and the bar Hughes owned.

"Not really... " he didn't even look at her, instead he was looking out of the window. Avoiding every possible eye contact because even though he could understand that Kate just wanted to be there for him, he still felt like talking to her would make no sense at all. Even she, New York's finest detective, wouldn't be able to change the way he felt right now, so why bother?

"Alexis didn't mean to hurt you, she's just preoccupied with her own feelings and thoughts..." she told him knowing exactly how hurt he was by his daughter's lack of needing him. Of course she knew that he was aware of the fact that Alexis hadn't intended to make him feel like that but maybe hearing it from someone else could pull him out of the dark place he'd gone to when leaving his daughter alone in her room together with Ethan.

"Mmh..." was all that she got as an answer from him. Had he even listened to what she'd just said? She wasn't quite sure about that but her attempt to comfort him had definitely been in vain.

"You know you can always talk to me, right? I'm here for you..." she wanted to help him so badly to get through this and yes she knew pushing him into talking wasn't what he needed right now. But maybe he just needed a little more encouragement, not much, just enough to show him he wouldn't be judged upon by her if he talked.

"I know, Kate... And I really appreciate what you're doing but I really don't feel like talking." he turned his head and for the first time since they'd left the dorm he was looking her into the eyes. She could see the pain in there, the disappointment and the not understanding, but there was also something different in his eyes. Something that told her he loved her for trying to support him now and for caring about him, the love for her that he'd felt for so long now and that had only intensified within the last four years. And although it was hard to see him reliving the moment his daughter had sent him away again and again in his head, she knew better than to try again, he wanted to be left alone with his thoughts and that she respected.

The rest of the way they drove in silence, not necessarily a comfortable silence but also not in one of those awkward or deafening silences that would follow a fight.

* * *

When they arrived in front of the bar they found the boys already waiting for them on the other side of the street, both wearing their vests. Without saying a word Castle and Beckett got out of the cruiser and crossed the street so the three detectives and the writer were standing right opposite the bar, having a good look on the entrance.

"So what's the plan boss?" Esposito asked immediately.

"I was thinking that..." Castle heard his girlfriend start explaining the plan but was distracted by the figure he saw out of the corner of his eye leaving the bar.

The graying hair and the slim body reminded him of someone he knew but he couldn't tell whom exactly. Maybe his mind was playing tricks on him, maybe he was starting to go crazy, which would fit right into the other happenings of the day, how could this day even get worse? Right it couldn't, nothing could trump being abandoned by your little daughter, so what did it matter if he was loosing his mind and ready for the nuthouse? He was just about to turn his attention back towards Beckett when the man at the entrance suddenly turned and his face became visible. Castle couldn't believe his eyes, he really had to lose his mind because otherwise his day might have just gotten a lot worse.

Jim Beckett.

He was coming out of the bar his daughter was about to burst into, so she could arrest the owner. What the hell was he doing in that bar? Or better what was he doing in any bar? He was a recovering alcoholic, shouldn't he try to avoid getting tempt to drink again? And where was the temptation bigger than in a bar? Castle's mind was running fast when the man suddenly looked right in his direction and every thought just stopped. Castle could just stand there staring at him but it didn't take long until Beckett's father started walking away and around a corner so he was out of sight.

Had he noticed that Castle had seen him? God what was Castle supposed to do? Tell Beckett or just leave it alone? Maybe it was nothing, maybe it wasn't even Jim Beckett but someone who looked really much like him.

"Okay, so let's get in there now!" Beckett said and catched his attention again when she started walking towards the door her father had just left through. Castle followed her, his thoughts still not completely back at what they'd come for.

"Wait, don't you want to put on your vest?" he asked confused when she walked past her car and didn't take her vest out of the trunk.

"Castle, did you just hear a word I said?" she stopped and turned around looking at him in concern.

"I... Ehhhr..." what was he supposed to say?

"Look I know you're upset because of Alexis and I totally understand if you don't want to do this. You're mind isn't in this, it's okay if you want to stay in the car." she told him with an understanding smile.

"No... No I want to go with you in there, it's just... I didn't really listen when you explained everything." he settled for this explanation, there was enough time to tell her later what he saw or thought he'd seen.

"Okay, so the plan is just that we go in there and the boys wait here, we'll look around if we see anything illegal we could arrest Hughes for and if so we arrest him, but if we're not out within 10 minutes Esposito and Ryan will come in." she explained a second time before finally entering the bar followed by a writer, whose mind wasn't anymore spinning around the encounter with his daughter. And even if it sounded harsh, he was grateful for the distraction although seeing his girlfriend's father had brought up a whole other predicament.

**So now we've got Castle in a difficult situation, what do you think, should he tell Beckett or maybe confront Jim first? I hope you guys don't think Alexis is OOC in this chapter because I see her as a rather independent young woman who wants to do what's the right thing in her opinion even if that means pushing Castle slightly away.**

**Please tell me what you think in a review :)**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N: Here is the next chapter, I had only very little time to write it due to my final exam in German, which I'll write tomorrow and had to learn for. I actually wasn't sure if I would even find the time to write this chapter, when you're learning something about the origin of language and the development of language you read so many texts but when then suddenly the name Beckett appears in one of them it has to be a sign(from the universe like Castle would say) right? :D So I just had to write this chapter and forget about learning.  
Just wanted to share this little experience :D  
Now on with the story :)**

* * *

The bar was one of those seedy places no one wanted to be seen, the dark wooden chairs and tables looked like they hadn't seen a cleaning cloth in forever and the shady figures sitting in the back of the rather dark place seemed to fit right into the whole picture. If you were a law-abiding citizen practically everything screamed 'Run for your life!'. They were still standing at the door, Beckett scanning the room carefully eying the people in it, and Castle looking around wondering even more than before why Jim Beckett would be spending his time in such a low-life bar.

She was busy trying to find everything that might become a danger once she would reveal that she was a cop and those guys in the corner could definitely become a problem. Except for them and a two rather harmless seeming young college boys sitting at the bar, the place was empty, good thing that it wasn't already late afternoon.

"I suggest we try talking to those two at the bar." Beckett whispered motioning towards the bar.

"Okay... But I doubt that either one of them is Hughes." Castle replied not really thinking. Of course Beckett would know that and probably she would shoot daggers at him for this subtle remark. That's what you get when being preoccupied with other things.

"Yes... I kind of tend towards agreeing with you there." she frowned at him, was he really that stupid and thought she didn't know those boys couldn't possibly be Hughes or was it just the thing with Alexis still bothering him? Castle chose to ignore the frown on his girlfriend's face, or didn't he notice it? Kate wasn't that sure but pushed the thought of what might be wrong besides the obvious aside and walked over to the two college boys.

She assumed that they were about Alexis age, both having light brown hair and looking as innocently as Ethan would look to anyone oblivious to his part-time job as a drug dealer. Positioning herself not too far away from them at the bar and turning towards her partner she felt the sticky surface of the counter under her hand. This place got more and more disgusting with each minute that passed.

"So this is where Trey spends his time?" she says loud enough so the boys would definitely hear her while she faced them with her back to hide her interest in the guys. Fortunately Castle's attention wasn't too far away so after just a few seconds of staring blankly at Beckett he finally understood that she expected him to say something and play along.

"Ehhr... Yes... That's it I guess..." he looked around again and his eyes stopped on the sight of the woman behind the bar. Had she stood there the whole time? He couldn't remember seeing her when they'd entered and looked around, maybe he just hadn't noticed her. After all he'd been preoccupied with other things, more important things than the bar girl.

"Interesting... And where is he now?" Kate said slowly looking around and stopping casually at the two boys while her partner was still eying the woman.

She'd turned her back towards them and her long dark brown hair was falling in slight curls around her shoulders. The skin tight black dress she was wearing barely covered her behind and she looked more like one of Beau Randolph's 'College Girls Gone Crazy' or a hooker. So apparently Trey Hughes loved to be surrounded by good-looking girls in not much clothes. Another fact that made Castle even more grateful for Alexis having never come here.

"Hey, you two don't know the owner of this bar by chance?" Beckett asked the boys then without even realizing that Castle was already distracted again. "Ehhr sure, everyone here knows Trey." one of the boys said a little hesitantly as he eyed her suspiciously.

"Great, so any idea when he'll be here, I kind of need to talk to him..." she'd noticed that the boy was suspicious about her asking but she tried to stay calm and to not show that anything was amiss.

"And who wants to know this?" the other boy asked before his friend could decide to answer. Apparently he was just as cautious as the other one and seemed to sense she was up to nothing good.

Castle in the meantime was still occupied with watching the girl, she moved behind the bar fluently as if she'd never done anything else in her life. The slight swaying of her hips when she took a step would cause any man to forget everything for a moment and Castle was certain that she knew just too well what effect her movements had on men. But he wasn't the slightest bit affected by it, judging from what he could see she was probably about half his age and therefore definitely way too young for him to be attracted to her, besides he could proudly call a gorgeous looking woman, most likely the most beautiful one he'd ever seen, his girlfriend and she was standing next to him at that very moment.

"You know, me and my boyfriend Ricky here are old friends of Trey and haven't seen him in a while." Beckett faked to be offended by the boy having second thoughts about her motif as she motioned towards Castle standing behind her. He was just about to turn his attention towards Beckett and the two guys because he had heard his name when the girl behind the bar cut in on the conversation but didn't immediately turned around.

"I'm really sorry to disappoint you but Trey isn't here..." Castle and Beckett recognised the voice and looked at each other, could that be?

"And I doubt he would want to talk to you, detective." the girl turned around and they looked into the blue eyes of Crystal Brooks again. That had definitely neither one of them expected and they were more than stunned to find Morrison's girlfriend working in the bar of the guy that most likely was to blame for the murder. What the hell was she doing here? Beckett as a detective of course was trained to not let her astonishment show so she didn't stand there just watching her like Castle did and instead voiced her thoughts.

"Well what a surprise to meet you here Miss..." that was when the girl interrupted her.

"Hey guys why don't the two of you take your drinks and go over there, let me deal alone with those nosey two." Crystal said turning towards the two boys, who more than willingly complied and sat down at a table several feet away. She definitely knew how to handle them, both Castle and Beckett thought.

"Nosey? Did you actually call me and my partner nosey?" Kate asked disbelievingly. Okay she had to admit that nosey described Castle rather well considering his urge to always touch things and annoy the shit out of her until she would tell him whatever it is that he wants to know. But her nosey? She couldn't believe the audacity with which Crystal was facing her.

"I think I just did." the girl stopped to smirk at her but went on. "But before you lose it, I think you might want to discuss this somewhere else... Where we're not watched..." she motioned inconspicuously behind them and when Castle turned around he saw every single person in the bar watching them.

"I think you forget to whom you're talking to." Kate said raising an eyebrow at her.

"Oh I know exactly who I'm talking to but you seem to forget that you need to talk to Trey and if you're blowing up your cover you won't get anywhere near him." she stated and Beckett knew she was right.

Damit.

"Okay, then I'd like you to come to the precinct later today. We've got to ask you some questions." she finally said begrudgingly after a minute.

"I'll see what i can do." Crystal replied smugly. She was more than pleased that Beckett had to admit that she was right and that the detective could do nothing against it.

"It should be in your own interest to come and help us investigate the murder of Mr. Morrison. And if you won't appear at the precinct until this afternoon I know now where to find you." with that Beckett turned around and left the bar followed by Castle, who'd silently watched the two woman interact. Again it had been very interesting to watch the young woman defy Beckett, she really wasn't backing down. A rarely occasion that someone acted this smugly towards the detective, Castle of course being the exception.

"She really is a pain in the ass..." Beckett muttered as soon as the two were outside the bar again.

When Esposito and Ryan approached they decided to watch the bar just in case Trey Hughes would make an appearance against all odds, which had the nice side effect to be able to make sure Crystal would really come to the precinct later that day and Beckett wouldn't have to worry about coming back here tomorrow.

* * *

Back at the precinct there was not much Beckett and Castle could do other than going through everything they'd gathered up to now but they didn't find another starting point for further investigations. So the couple had enough time to grab a bite to eat at Remy's where Beckett initially planned on talking to him about Alexis' behavior and distract him from the thoughts that apparently were still bothering him.

But she decided against it being not completely sure about what to tell him, of course he probably knew his daughter hadn't intended to hurt him so telling him that most likely wouldn't have the effect she hoped for. Besides she wasn't even able to comfort him by assuring him she knew how it must feel to be disappointed by your child because after all she wasn't a parent and although she knew the feeling of being disappointed by someone she loved that might not be the same. So yes she dropped her plan and instead engaged in small talk, which apparently was relieving for him since it gave him the opportunity to think some more.

But instead of thinking about the situation with Alexis, like Kate thought, his thoughts were still occupied with the question of what Jim Beckett had done in that bar. Did him being there mean he'd had a relapse and was drinking again? But didn't most people who do that have a certain experience that led them back to their problem? Castle hadn't noticed anything over the previous encounters with his girlfriend's father and also Kate hadn't mentioned her dad being at risk to relapse or maybe even she hadn't seen the signs pointing towards the inevitable?

In short the whole lunch thing was rather awkward, talking about everything else than what really was on their minds and not really listening to what the other one said.

Coming back to the precinct they found Esposito and Ryan already back at their desks busing themselves with some paperwork.

"Did you bring Crystal Brooks in with you guys?" Beckett asked walking towards her desk.

"Yes, but unfortunately she'd been right Hughes didn't show up." Esposito explained walking over to his boss followed by Ryan.

"Okay let's hope Brooks can help us find him, so where is she?" Beckett asked already walking in the direction of the interrogation rooms.

"We brought her into the break room, she wanted a coffee..." Ryan explained looking nervously at Beckett. He knew that they probably should have put her into one of the interrogation rooms considering it was more than suspicious that the girl worked for the man who hired a killer to get her boyfriend out of the way.

"Oh so now we're a coffee shop." she said sarcastically when looking at the two detectives.

"She was nice and asked if she could get one... didn't seem like she has anything to do with the murder." Esposito defended their action.

"I'm sure she was..." rolling her eyes she turned around and made her way towards the break room. She could vividly imagine how the girl had thrown herself at Esposito and stroked his ego just to get her will and of course he had fallen for it. Men! She shook her head at the thought before she and Castle finally reached the door.

When they entered the break room Crystal sat on the couch drinking her cup of coffee just like Ryan had told them.

"So Miss Brooks can you tell me now what exactly you've got to do with Trey Hughes?" Beckett asked sitting down on one of the chairs opposite the couch.

"Nice room you've got here..." she didn't even acknowledge the question as she looked around the room.

"Yes, thank you. So?" she said curtly knowing the girl wanted to distract her.

"So what?" Crystal asked as if she had no clue what Beckett was talking about.

"Care to explain why you're working for the man who hired someone to kill Daniel Morrison?" her voice was on the edge of anger, did this girl wanted to provoke her?

"Oh so I guess you know about the threats then?" she asked still not answering the detective's question. Beckett had to take several deep breaths to not yell at her. This was to frustrating, couldn't this girl just do what was expected of her and answer the freaking question? Slowly processing the exact words Crystal had used Kate realized that apparently she knew about the threats and probably had known for some time.

"Yes we do." Castle answered for his girlfriend sensing the inner fight of her to stop her anger from getting the better of her.

"Wait so you knew he was threatened? And you didn't think of telling us yesterday?" she yelled at the girl, finally losing the struggle with her anger.

"Well I thought about it but the way you treated me didn't really encourage me to help you with your investigation." again Crystal had this arrogant tone in her voice and the smug smile on her lips that they'd already seen in the interrogation room the day before.

"Shouldn't the death of your boyfriend be enough of an encouragement?" Castle asked a little confused by Crystal's motifs.

"Let me put it this way Mr. Castle, I'm not really fond of the methods the NYPD would use to bring justice for Daniel's death." she ignored the annoyed look Beckett gave her when she only addressed the writer.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Kate asked but was still ignored by the girl. Castle meanwhile seemed to get what the girl was saying and looked as if he would suddenly understand everything.

"You want to make sure Hughes gets what he deserves in your opinion." it wasn't a question, he knew that that was what she meant.

"You want to take the law into your own hands?" Beckett asked not believing that even Crystal could be that stupid and overestimate herself that much to face a cold-blooded drug boss.

"Revenge is a powerful feeling, it has everything to do with passion and the pain of losing someone you love. But who am I explaining that to, you know that too well don't you detective?" she faced Kate and the look in her eyes showed how much she knew about the detective and how superior she felt.

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**Don't forget to review so there'll be another experience that gets me to write more even with the next two final exams to come :)**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N: So the last chapter didn't get much attention from you guys but I really hope you're still reading this?! Anyway, here comes the next chapter :) Hopefully you all take time to review because it's amazing to hear what other people think.  
**

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To say Kate was shocked would be an understatement, she was completely thrown off track but still hold the girl's gaze. Why the hell did Crystal just say that? What did she know? Was she also involved in that case? No she couldn't, she was way too young to have something to do with it, she would have been like 6 or so? But then why did she seem to know about Beckett's history with the case of her mother?

"What do you mean? Why does she know that only too well?" Castle asked pretending to have no clue when he sensed the thoughts running wild in her head and she didn't react.

"I'm sure you know what I meant with that." she said without looking at him, not wanting to break the eye-contact with the detective.

"But how? How do you know about that?" Castle asked puzzled.

"Well maybe I'll tell you one day but for now I've got to go. I guess I'll see you around." with that the girl stood up and walked towards the door.

"Wait." Kate suddenly exclaimed when Chris was already half out the door.

"You can't go back to the bar." she stated.

"I sure can and I will." the girl took a few steps towards Beckett again.

"I think you don't understand, if Trey Hughes really is behind the murder you could be in danger." she said insistently.

"Oh I do understand that but he won't find out who I really am, to him I'm just a girl, who is new in the city and needs a job. Oh and I'm sure he's kind of fond of me, this short dress and killer heels tend to drive men crazy." she pointed at the dress, which Castle had already noticed was really short back in the bar and the black heels she wore. No doubt Hughes wouldn't think of her as a danger, he wouldn't be able to think at all because all his blood would be pumped into another part of his body that wasn't his brain.

"And what are you planning to do when you got close to him?" Beckett asked sceptically raising an eyebrow at the girl.

"Nothing, just talk..." Crystal said innocently knowing exactly that the detective could hold her at the precinct if she admitted to plan on killing Hughes.

"You think I'm stupid? You won't just talk to him, I'm sure you've planned every detail. From how you manage him to trust you to how to make him suffer for what he did to your boyfriend." Kate told her knowing exactly what she was talking about. She had been there, she'd planned on making Bracken suffer just like her mother had to in that alley 14 years ago.

"Maybe you shouldn't draw conclusions based on your own feelings..." she wouldn't admit it, she was too clever to do so.

"Okay apparently you want it this way, you'll spend the night in one of our cells. I can't risk Hughes getting to know about this investigation or you doing something stupid." Beckett stood up and opened the door to call for an officer.

"Well considering you don't have any proof against me and that you can only hold me for 24 hours I'm positive I'll be out of here by this time tomorrow." she said smiling confidently before she was led away by the officer.

"Why does she put herself in such a danger? And why on earth doesn't she want our help? She's just so awfully stubborn, I really dislike her. Seriously how can a single person be this stubborn?" Kate asked frustrated as she looked at her partner hoping he would have an explanation. But Castle just stared at her blankly.

"Seriously? You're really annoyed by her stubbornness and stupidity?" he asked incredulously eyes widening and trying to hold back his smirk.

"Yes I am, and I don't know what's so funny. Wipe that smug grin off your face." she looked annoyed at him still not understanding what Castle was thinking.

"You do know that in some ways you're just like her, right? If you want to do something, even if it's incredibly dangerous, you won't accept anyone's help and the only one who can stop you from doing it are you..." he explained a little hesitantly because he wasn't sure how Kate would react.

"I'm not like her! Besides I'm a cop, I have to take certain risks in order to catch killers. So there's a huge difference between Crystal Brooks putting herself and me putting myself in danger, while it just shows how stupid she is am I just doing my job." she states somewhat angrily making clear this topic wasn't open for discussion anymore and Castle would better keep his mouth shut.

And that's what he did he didn't want this to turn into a huge argument so he just didn't point out that going after Maddox alone without any back up had been just as stupid as Crystal starting to work for her boyfriend's killer just to get revenge. But he didn't say a word because somehow he was glad Kate had been this stupid that day, after all that stupidity was the reason they were together now. Without it she wouldn't have realized that her priorities had changed, that now he was the most important thing in her life and that she was finally ready to admit her true feelings to herself and also him.

They started walking out of the break room and towards her desk again as she suddenly asked "Why did you defend her?"

"I wasn't defending her, it's just... I can understand her motif just like I understand the reasons for your stubbornness... and maybe you shouldn't be that harsh on her..." he explained hoping his girlfriend understood what he meant.

Kate thought about it and had to admit that even if she wasn't a detective she would have gone after Bracken as soon as she had known he was behind her mother's murder. Maybe Castle was right and Crystal wasn't stupid but simply driven by the pain and desperation of losing a beloved one.

"Okay but why doesn't she trust us? It always seems like she sees the NYPD as a threat and hates everyone..." she thought out loud. That didn't make any sense, if she was a normal citizen she would be grateful for the help of the NYPD.

"Oh I think she likes Esposito..." Castle blurted out but stopped as he saw Beckett's death glare.

"Oh so does that mean you think it's just me she doesn't like?"

"No, I didn't mean... It's just..." thankfully at this moment her phone started ringing and Castle didn't have to answer that question. Because thinking of it he didn't really have an answer. After all Esposito thought Crystal was kind of nice and Ryan even let her sit in the break room drinking coffee, who knows if she really just didn't like Beckett, which was a given considering how she had acted towards her.

"Beckett." she answered and her face softened when she heard who was on the other end."Hey Dad, it's so nice you called. Yes, I know, I already wanted to call you but I'm kind of buried in work..." Castle's eyes widened, why was Jim Beckett calling his daughter while she was at work? Did he feel bad because Castle had seen him coming out of the bar and called to check if Kate already knew?

"Sure, how about this saturday? Yes, sounds perfect, see you then. Bye dad." and then she ended the call.

"So what did your father want?" he asked trying to sound casually.

"He just wants to meet with me, apparently there's something he wants to talk to me about." she explained sitting down at her desk not even looking at her boyfriend. Fortunately for him because otherwise she would have seen the shocked expression appearing on his face and asked him what it was about.

It looked like Jim Beckett wanted to tell his daughter personally that he started drinking again, so it was better for Castle to just keep quiet about what he had seen in front of the bar, right? Jim apparently wanted to do the right thing, Castle shouldn't foil that plan, right?

"Oh okay and you'll meet him saturday?" he asked when he had composed himself. Beckett just nodded and looked through some papers on her desk.

"Well I would love to stay but I should be home when Alexis comes, hope you don't mind me leaving now?" he asked remembering the other important thing that was on his mind.

"Oh, yes you probably should go. It's okay, sort that thing with your daughter out. I'll see you tomorrow." she gave him a reassuring smile hoping sincerely that he would feel better after having a whole evening alone with Alexis.

* * *

Martha wasn't in town because early this week she'd decided to go to the Hamptons for a few days to relax and recover from her stressful days at the acting school. So when he opened the door to the loft he expected to find no one home but to his surprise Alexis was already there preparing dinner for the two of them. Didn't she text him she was on her way home just about 10 minutes ago? Okay most likely it was more than 10 minutes ago because he'd gotten the text when he was just about to get in a cab at the precinct but it sure felt like only very little time ago.

"Alexis... you're already home?" he asked puzzled but pleased to see her, even if she'd hurt him really bad it felt good to see her now.

"Yes, the officers detective Beckett send for protection brought me home." Alexis explained as she looked at her dad trying to find out whether he was still hurt and maybe mad or not. He just nodded still standing a few feet away from his daughter unsure what to do. Right she didn't have to take the subway, he could have gathered that the officers would drive her home.

"I hope you're okay with me making dinner?" she asked hesitantly when Castle stayed silent and just watched her.

"Oh yes... that's fine." he said awkwardly standing in the middle of his kitchen still not really knowing how to act. Should he bring up what had happened at her dorm? It had been obvious that she'd noticed how hurt he had been and the way he knew his daughter she would feel terrible about it by now. So maybe it was cleverer to wait and let her start talking.

"Listen dad, I'm sorry..." it didn't take long until she turned again to face him. "I didn't mean to hurt you, I know you were just looking out for me and wanted to make sure by yourself that I'm okay..." she waited for him to say something but again she just got a nod as a reply.

"But I really needed to talk to Ethan alone... It didn't seem right to break up with him while you would have stood by my side... that was something I had to do on my own." she went on explaining hoping he would understand and that he would forgive her for sending him away.

"You broke up with him?" he was stunned, that was something he hadn't expected at all. The whole time he'd been so sure that she'd picked her boyfriend over him, that Ethan was more important to her than her own father was but the truth had never occurred to him. She'd send him away to do what she felt was right, because she'd thought it wasn't fair to Ethan to end their relationship while a third person was present.

"Yes I did. It felt like he was a complete different person, it seems I didn't know him at all..." she looked down ashamed to have to admit that her father had been right the whole time, Ethan was really bad news and she shouldn't have spent time with him in the first place.

"I won't tell you I told you so, but..." he said serious looking at his daughter.

"I know Dad, you were right... sorry for not believing you." she apologized sincerely.

"Not that you wouldn't believe me was what hurt me, Alexis." he was the serious father now, who had to make sure his daughter fully understood how her behavior affected him and why he was disappointed in her. Never had he thought Alexis would need this kind if talk, she was usually the responsible and grown up one while he was, well, him. She always knew what was wrong and how to behave but apparently today had been an exception. So for the sake of his precious little daughter he had to step up and be her father and not the man-child he could be.

"I know... and believe me I'm so sorry I immediately felt bad after sending you away." she said hoping her dad would let it go. But Castle actually didn't feel really comfortable with just letting it go. Wasn't he supposed to give her a hugel lecture about what's right and what's wrong? That's what parents do when their kid had pushed the limits too far, right?

"Alexis, I hear you and I know that you deeply regret what happened... I really don't know what to do here..." he was completely lost.

"How about leave it like that, accept my apology-dinner and have a movie night with your daughter?" she said hesitantly giving her dad the best innocent-girl-smile she could manage. Of course it had the effect she hoped for, after all Castle wasn't good at this, at being the strict parent and deep inside he wanted nothing else than to just forget about all of it and have his little girl back.

* * *

It was already late and father and daughter had just started watching the third movie of the evening when Castle noticed a change in his daughter's posture. The dinner had gone smoothly and both of them had relaxed over time so he had no clue what was bothering her suddenly.

"What's up pumpkin? You seem a little tensed, I thought we settled everything." he asked turning towards his daughter, who sat next to him on the huge couch in the living room.

"Ehhr nothing dad. It's really nothing." she replied but seemed to contemplate whether he should tell him what changed her mood so suddenly or stay with pretending everything was alright.

"Alexis I know there's something bothering you so what is it? No more secrets, just tell me." he insisted hoping that it wasn't the next shocking revelation because another one would definitely be too much for him. Having reassurance that Ethan was out of his daughter's life enabled him to completely concentrate on helping Kate and the boys to catch the killer so Alexis wouldn't be in any kind of danger. And of course there was still Jim Beckett's appearance at the bar on his mind, which didn't want to stop bothering him. Another not expected revelation he couldn't deal with at this point.

"I was just wondering about Daniel's girlfriend..." Alexis mumbled not looking at her father seated next to her.

"You know Crystal Brooks?" he was surprised. Why did his daughter knew her? Hadn't she told Beckett she'd only known Morrison a little from seeing him once or twice? Then why did she know his girlfriend?

"Yes, we met often since Ethan introduced me to her and Daniel on a party. She must be devastated..." she explained as she now looked at her dad hoping he would share with her what he knew about Crystal.

"Well she's definitely out if her mind..." he couldn't tell her about the ongoing investigation and the girl's involvement in it so saying this had to be enough.

"She'll get through it, she's a fighter..." his daughter said absentminded.

"How do you know?" Castle asked hoping Alexis could tell him anything that would make Crystal's actions and thoughts more reasonable.

"She told me once that her mother had been a drug addict not caring about her or anything that wouldn't make her get the high she anticipated. But Chris learned how to survive all by herself and took care of herself aware of the fact that she never wanted to become like her mother. And then, when her mum died, she came to New York." Alexis explained and Castle could only imagine what was behind the tough and self-confident mask Crystal had shown them at the precinct the whole time. He thought about everything his daughter had just told him and knew there had certainly been a lot of situations he didn't even want to picture, in which Chris had been lost. A little girl forced to take care of herself, to grow up way too soon. No surprise she trusted no one, he thought.

"Did she also tell you why she came to New York?" Castle asked careful to not seem too nosey. He didn't want his daughter to get the wrong impression and feel like he was interrogating her about her friends because he didn't trust her after the incident with Ethan. Because he still had trust in her judgement, she had made the right choices the past 18 years so chances were good she would keep making them now, especially after her mistake with Ethan.

"Not really, she just mentioned there was someone here she needed to talk to... She seemed pretty determined to find this person. I figured it had to be her father, since he wasn't around when she grew up..." Alexis replied without hesitating. She seemed to take her father's statement about keeping no secrets anymore rather seriously and told him honestly everything she knew. Of course she noticed his huge interest in Crystal but wasn't sure whether she should ask him about it or just ignore it.

"So... Do you know where Chris is staying now that she can't live in Daniel's appartement?" she asked after some time, feeling sorry for the girl and her difficult situation. She could only imagine how the girl had to feel, it seemed as if Crystal's life was full of disasters and tragedies while her own had always been rather easy. Of course there had been the time where her mum had just left without looking back and it had really hurt Alexis as she was too young to understand why her mother had suddenly disappeared. And also the huge disappointment that was now her ex-boyfriend but if you looked at the whole picture she couldn't complain.

"Ehhr... Actually she stays at the precinct this night, Beckett thought it might be safer for her... But apart from that I don't really know where she'll stay." Castle answered truthfully. Just like he had said, no more secrets. He honestly didn't know where the girl would stay, maybe at Trey Hughes appartement, but he didn't know for sure and didn't want his daughter more involved in the case than she already was.

Appreciating that her father was honest with her Alexis nodded and turned back towards the TV to watch the movie currently playing. She seemed to relax again and her father was more than thankful that the evening had taken such a good course. It could have been definitely worse, Alexis and he could have had a huge argument about Ethan and the drugs but they hadn't, she could have asked further about Crystal and why it was safer for her to stay at the precinct but she hadn't and so Castle was totally content sitting on the couch next to his daughter watching the thrid movie of the evening.

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**Please take time to review and tell me what you think, even if you just write two words I'd be happy :)**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N: Okay I know that some of you wanted to see a little more Castle/Beckett time and totally agreed with you. So I started writing this chapter with the intention to write some cute little fluff but then I felt like they had to discuss their fight a bit more and the outcome is this chapter. I'm not really sure about the beginning though cause it got a little more depressing than I had planned but it get's better and I hope you like it... :)**  
**So here you go, have fun reading and don't forget to tell me whether you like it or not :)**

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When Kate lay in her bed that night she couldn't stop herself from thinking about everything that had happened in the last 48 hours. It had been hard to see Castle struggle with the possibility of his daughter being in serious trouble and to see him being disappointed by Alexis simply sending him away as if she didn't care about how worried her father had been. But most of all it had been nerve wrecking to fight with him.

Of course they had also argued in the past but never twice in such a short time and not to the extend they had done the last two days. Normally they had had an argument over rather unimportant little things like why it is always her that gets to drive or his childish behavior in all the wrong situations but this time they had fought about something much more meaningful. Something that could have driven them apart. Were they really okay after all those stupid decisions they had made and all those things they had said that had hurt the other one?

Castle had told her he wasn't angry at her anymore for not telling him immediately about Alexis' involvement in the case but still they had fought again and he hadn't even stopped from pointing out how little knowledge she had of kids. It had hurt her when he had hinted at her having no idea because she wasn't a parent, after all she would love to become a mother someday in the future. She was always amazed by how simple kids saw the world and bringing one into this world, accompany it throughout its life would be better than anything her job could offer her. But she never found the right man to start a family with, not until now. And maybe she blew her chances to get all that by lying to him, by taking the situation with Alexis not as serious as he had done.

What father would want a woman in his life that thought he was overreacting when he was worried about his daughter? Maybe he hadn't realized it yet but it would bother him eventually. Even if he thought he was okay with how she had acted now soon he wouldn't be able to ignore it. They were doomed to fall apart and she was the one responsible for that. Again she had managed to sabotage a good relationship, first Will, then Demming and Josh and now, now she had also thrown away the only relationship she had always wanted to work out, she had thrown away her chance on a future with Castle.

Certainly Rick wouldn't want anything to do with her in a couple of days or a month, she buried herself in black despair and self-reproaches not noticing the low beep of her cell signalizing an incoming text. He had told her everything was fine and he could understand why she had done it but Kate didn't believe it was all water under the bridge now. That would be way too easy and when did anything in her life ever run smoothly? She was stupid and making a mistake she wouldn't have to wait long until life would hit her right in the face. That is how it has always worked out so why should it be different this time?

Slowly a tear, she had desperately tried to hold back, escaped her hazel eyes. The thoughts in her head were running wild, from the first encounter with Castle and how he made her job a little more fun over finally getting together with him and spending beautiful hours with him to the fight not even 24 hours ago asking herself why such a good thing like their relationship had to come to an end. She couldn't stop herself from crying, all she wanted to do at that moment was to lie in his arms breathing in his scent and hoping she could somehow repair what was broken.

Watching at the clock on her bedside table she longed for his voice. It was just a little past midnight and she wanted to call him, maybe he wouldn't be asleep yet. Although actually this evening was supposed to just be about him and his daughter, Kate didn't want to intrude that would make her situation only worse. But she needed reassurance that they were really okay, talking to him for just a few minutes wouldn't bother anyone, and would make her feel much better. So she reached for her phone and unlocked it slowly. There was a text, she hadn't heard it had come but that didn't matter because it was from him.

Castle had sent her a text, what did it say? Unsure of about what exactly he wanted and why he texted this late she hesitated before opening it. He wouldn't just break up with her over a text would he? No, Richard Castle was a gentleman and not some coward, who couldn't face his girlfriend when he broke up with her. Taking a deep breath she finally opened it.

**Hey Alexis and I are okay now. Miss you. x Rick**

A smile appeared on her face and the tears stopped, she felt relieved that he apparently thought of her and missed her although it had only been about 7 or 8 hours since he had last seen her.

**Glad you sorted things out, I miss you too. Would love to hear your voice... x Kate** She quickly wrote and pressed send wiping the last tears away.

And then, before she could even calm down completely, her cell started ringing and Castle's face appeared on the screen. She hesitated to pick up because the last thing she wanted was to sound like she had had a complete meltdown, crying and sobbing like a little kid.

"Hey." she finally answered after taking another deep breath trying to sound as normal as possible but without much success.

"Kate, what's wrong?" he immediately asked concerned.

"Nothing, just happy to hear your voice." she lied but knew he wouldn't believe her a single word. Why did he have to know her so well?

"You sound as if you've cried your eyes out." he pointed out not knowing why exactly she was this sad. She had seemed rather fine when he had left the precinct so what had happened since then? "

I'm fine." she assured him only half-heartedly because it actually didn't matter what she said and how convincing she sounded, Rick just knew she wasn't fine at all. It was almost as if he had a Beckett-sense telling him exactly what she felt and often even what she was thinking.

"No, you're not and we both know it. I'm coming over." she rolled her eyes, as expected he didn't buy any of her I'm fine, everything's okay bullshit. It was not like she couldn't have foreseen that something like this would inevitably happen. Why had she even picked up when he called? Right she'd wanted to hear his voice so badly and now she had to live with the consequence that he wouldn't stop bugging her until he would every little detail that had made her crying her eyes out. Wait, did he just say he would come over?

"No!" she exclaimed once she had realized that Castle was about to leave his daughter only so he could be there for her.

"You need me, I can hear that. I'll be there in 10 minutes." he said simply and was already about putting his jacket on and heading out the door.

"Wait. But you should be with Alexis, it's your time with your daughter, I don't want to intrude." she insisted, her voice stronger now. She couldn't have him coming over when it was an evening he should actually spend with his daughter. She would be fine even if he wasn't around to comfort her and take away all those worries.

"Alexis went to bed about half an hour ago, she won't mind." he explained not seeing where there was a problem.

"But I would. You stay at your place, I'll be okay." she found the strength to fight him on this, he shouldn't leave his loft, it would only make her feel worse.

"Okay, if you don't want me to come you'll be coming over to the loft. The car will be there in 10 minutes." he gave in but still wanted to be there for her. God this woman was so stubborn. He couldn't believe it, no matter how miserable she felt she insisted on having her will.

"But..." she started to answer him back but was interrupted by Castle.

"No buts, you're my girlfriend and you're obviously not fine so I'll be there for you. You don't want me to come over, that's fine, but you won't spend the night alone crying yourself to sleep." he told her sternly leaving no option for discussing it further. She would come over, that's it.

"Okay... but only because you insist." she agreed reluctantly. Why was he insisting on seeing her? And of course he always told her she was stubborn, wasn't this the best proof you could get for him being way more stubborn than she was? She was the one that gave in and agreed to go to the loft. Loose a battle to win the war they say, right?

"Fine, I'll see you in 20 minutes, bye." he replied relieved that she finally stopped to argue about it and no longer pretended she was fine without him by her side.

"Bye." she said and was actually rather happy that he hadn't backed down. She really needed to talk to him in person, that would be the only thing making her feel better.

* * *

When Kate had changed into some jeans and a t-shirt she left her appartement and just like Castle had told her a car was already waiting for her in front of the building. She started thinking about what to tell him. Should she just tell him again how sorry she was or would it be better to admit that she felt like she ruined everything and that soon he wouldn't want to be with her? That was a tough decision to make after all the last thing she wanted to do was indicating she didn't believe in how strong their relationship was, that would only hurt him more.

The drive to the loft had never seemed shorter, being occupied with her thoughts it only felt like they had driven 2 minutes when the car stopped in front of the building Castle lived in. And before she had even realized it she was out of the car and through the door politely nodding at the door man and entering the elevator. She was tensed when she thought about what they needed to discuss and with every story the elevator rode higher towards the loft it seemed to become harder to breathe.

Why was she here again? Right, she was here because she hadn't been able to convincingly pretend everything was fine when he had called. Actually she knew it was best to talk about everything that was on her mind but a huge part of her just wanted to pretend nothing had ever happened and fall asleep in his arms. When elevator doors opened she felt nowhere near ready to face him but that didn't matter, she had to move towards the loft. And so she set one foot in front of the other and slowly walked down the hallway until she stood right in front of the door.

Now she would just have to knock. Preparing herself for seriously talking to him about everything that made her miserable she took a few deep breaths to calm her nerves. She still didn't feel like openly discuss her worries with him and could have used a few more minutes to clearly think about what to say, when suddenly without her knocking the door flung open and a very worried looking Castle stood in front of her.

"Kate." he exclaimed eying her intently and he didn't like what he saw. He had been right, she wasn't fine at all, in fact she looked miserable. Her face told him everything she wasn't able to put into words, too surprised by him suddenly standing in front of her she looked at him like a doe in the headlights. Not even waiting until Kate had realized that she probably should say something he was by her side pulling her in for a tight hug.

She had really tried to stay calm and focused on suppressing all the emotions threatening to overwhelm her again but as soon as she was in his arms, breathing in his scent, leaning against his masculine chest, she couldn't hold back anymore. Tears were streaming down her cheek again and were now soaked up by the fabric of his shirt showing just how much she had needed him.

"Hey, don't cry... What's wrong?" he whispered soothingly into her ear, still not really sure what had caused her emotional break down.

"Just hold me." she begged in between sobs clinging onto him and not letting go. She would never let him go, he was just too important. If there was anyone she would fight for keeping in her life it would be him.

Without any more questions he picked her up in his arms and carried her into the loft, shutting the door with his foot, and placing her in his lap on the couch. She was still shaking and sobbing like he had never seen her do before. Usually she was in control of her emotions and feelings, only showing little glimpse of her vulnerability but the Kate in his lap was the exact opposite and it somehow scared the shit out of him. What had happened that she cried like this afraid to lat go of him? Had something happened at the precinct after he had left? Or... No, this couldn't still be because of their fight, could it?

After several minutes of silently holding her. her sobs softened and the tears dried. What had she been thinking? She couldn't just cling to him and cry her eyes out without giving him any kind of explanation what it was all about. Why did she have to lose control about her feelings right now? This really sucked, what was she going to tell him?

"Are you okay now?" he asked still holding her to his chest.

"Yes... No... I mean, I don't know." she wasn't sure about anything anymore. God she sounded like a pathetic little girl, what was wrong with her? She had decided to come here to talk it through but apparently the part of her, who was willing to honestly tell him what her problem was, got lost on the way over here.

"That's okay, do you want to tell me what got you this sad?" he asked slowly not wanting to upset her by pushing to hard for answers she wasn't willing to share yet. "I don't know." she whispered still clinging onto him.

"You don't know if you want to tell me or you don't know what saddened you?" he asked and she could hear the little smile in his voice, he desperately wanted to cheer her up but that was a lot more difficult than he had imagined. She didn't move a single muscle, not the slightest sign of a smile.

"The first." she replied quietly while she still couldn't bring herself to look at him. God Kate, get a grip and at least look him in the eyes and don't just sit on his lap. Seeking the warmth of his body but avoiding any eye-contact was ridiculous, she told herself.

"Okay. Well maybe if you talk to me I can help you... Comfort you." he suggested getting more and more the impression that not letting her go through her meltdown alone had been the right decision even if she had hated him at first for stubbornly insisting on being there for her.

"God I wanted to tell you but now... I just don't know how... I'm afraid..." she tried to explain but was annoyed by the way it came out, she couldn't even form a coherent sentence without stopping in the middle of it. Where the hell was her tough side when she could use it?

"Afraid of what? Did something happen at the precinct after I was gone?" he asked immediately hoping to get a reaction from her but she didn't say anything neither did she move. Her face was still pressed into his chest so she didn't have to look at him.

"Or ist this... Do you still think about what happened? Our fight?" he asked the only other thing that came to his mind and this time he could feel her stiffen at the mentioning of them fighting. So his assumption had been right, the fight was still bothering her. Probably she had been thinking about it the whole time since he had left the precinct and then finally after hours of overthinking the whole situation she was caught in a downward spiral of her emotions now.

"Kate, look at me..." he begged her asking himself why she couldn't let go of their fight like he had done.

Now the time had come that she needed to face him. She knew she could do so without starting to cry again, she could do it, at least that was what she told herself. Slowly losening her grip on his shirt she looked up into his deep blue eyes and saw the love and worry behind them. She swallowed hard to stop the tears from falling again, yhe didn't need him to see her anymore crying than he had already this night.

"I don't know why you're still thinking about it, I told you we're fine. Actually I've thought we left it behind us and were moving on..." he saw that she was struggling with herself again so she wouldn't cry and he admired her determination to be strong even though she was feeling miserable.

"I know you said we're fine but it's just... I started thinking about everything that happened and suddenly I realized how awful I behaved. I was totally ignorant telling you what to do and not to do in although you were right, I had no idea how you must have felt... I'm not a mother, I can't possibly understand how it feels to see your child getting into huge trouble." she explained quietly, gesturing with her hands and trying to not look Castle directly in the eyes. She knew if she just looked straight at him she wouldn't be able to stay focused on the matter of her meltdown so she tried to compensate the urge to just start crying and sobbing again by letting her eyes fly over everything else in the room but him while gesturing like her life depended on it.

"But someday you'll understand. Only because you're not yet a mother doesn't mean you'll never understand. But that's not the point, the point is to me it doesn't matter how you behaved and what you pretended to understand. If you ask me if it hurt me being told I was overreacting about everything with Alexis, the answer would be yes but that's over. It's not your fault you didn't understand how I felt, you did what you thought was right and at that moment you thought it was right to tell me I was overreacting and I didn't even think of how my behavior would affect you too. It's okay Kate I tell you again now, we're fine." he said hoping his words would reach her and calm her down a little. But he couldn't tell if they had that effect on her, the only thing he could see were that her eyes began to glisten and soon a single tear was running down her right cheek again although she still didn't look into his eyes.

Was she reassured now and the tear was proof of how happy his little speech had made her? Or was she still sad? He wasn't quite sure because her posture hadn't changed, she was still rather tensed and not as relaxed as Castle would have liked her to be now.

"I'm sure you truly believe that, but... It's only a matter of time until you realize that you can't be with me anymore..." her voice was barely above a whisper when she told him that.

"What? I don't seem to get what you're talking about." why does she believe he would leave her after some time? Hadn't he made clear that he was in this for the long haul? Wasn't his patience over four years proof enough that he was in love with her and would do anything to make her happy? He would even tear down that wall of hers again, no matter if it took him another four years, he wanted to be with her and only her.

Eventually you'll realize you can't have someone like me in your life..." she said cryptically, he still didn't know what exactly she was talking about, was this still about their fight?

"Someone like you? You mean an extraordinary, beautiful woman, who's sometimes frustrating and maddening but still owns my heart because she takes me just like I am? A woman that doesn't want to change a thing about me? Tell me how can't I have such a woman in my life?" he was lost, how could she ever think he wouldn't want her in his life at some point? Didn't she know what she meant to him?

"No, I mean a woman who has no sympathy for the worries you live through because of your child..." now she looked him in the eyes, deciding it was too late to stop from crying anyway because of the few tears that had already escaped her eyes again. So she looked at him and saw all the love he had for her, that she was sure would fade over the next couple of weeks. She bit her lip to hold back the sobbing, to keep at least a little composure but it was to no use, the sobs escaped her nonetheless.

"Only because you couldn't understand it once? There have been so many situations in which you've proven that you're supportive and understanding when I'm worried about Alexis, just think of recently when you were totally fine with me leaving after Alexis had called crying. You even told me to go and make sure she was okay although it was supposed to be a wonderful night just for the two of us because it had been so long since we had time to ourselves. Today at the precinct you didn't have this sympathy and that's okay, we're fine and I really don't mind anymore so why do you think I would change my mind in the future?" he asked not really understanding where her sudden insecurities came from.

"Because I always ruin things, nothing in my life ever went smoothly. No matter if it was with Demming or Josh, whatever I do I always end up making a mistake that will bite me in the ass sooner or later, so why should it be different this time?" she exclaimed desperately. Actually she wanted to believe that it would be different this time because it was Castle but if she let herself hope, even if it was only for a split second, the pain of being proven wrong would break her.

"Because it's us Kate, I'm not Josh or Demming. For four years I fought against that wall you tried to protect yourself with just because I knew the person behind it was the one woman I truly want. There's nothing you could do that would make me give up on us, I fought too hard for you to just leave you when it gets a little difficult." he wiped away her tears with his hand and made sure she was looking at him so she would understand the truth that lay in his words.

"Really? There's nothing I could do?" she asked just to make sure she had heard right and it wasn't a dream. A slight smile crossed her lips and with that little change of her expression he knew he had convinced her he was serious. It felt good to hear him say how much she and their relationship meant to him, it was just what she had needed and now she could acknowledge that it definitely hadn't been a mistake to come over. Smiling back at his girlfriend he was more than relieved to see her smile at least a little but just that little smile wouldn't be enough for him. He needed to see her million dollar smile that he'd fallen in love with as soon as he had first seen it.

"Well okay maybe there is one thing..." he said suddenly looking rather serious again.

"What?" she asked a little unsure and he could see the fear in her eyes. She was terrified of what he would tell her now.

"I think I would have to consider giving up on us if you decided to catch a time traveling killer using a lightsaber without me..." he replied trying his best to keep a straight face but failed miserably when he saw Kate's face breaking into a huge smile as she realized he was just kidding to make her smile.

"I'd never do that." she promised and leaned on to kiss him deeply. The first kiss they shared since she'd arrived over an hour ago and it said everything. From how sorry she was for doubting this relationship was different from the ones she had had before, over how much he appreciated her talking to him about her worries, up to how much they loved each other.

"Want to go to bed?" he asked when they parted because the need for air became too much.

"Yes. But you know, I'm not really tired yet..." she said seductively as she stood up and took his hand leading him towards the bedroom.

"Good, me neither..." he grinned and followed her only too willingly. Somehow he knew that tonight it wouldn't only be about the hot sex they'd had since the beginning but about giving her the last piece of reassurance she needed to be completely convinced that he wasn't going anywhere. And he would gladly give her that.

* * *

**Now tell me what you think, I was really over the moon when I saw how many of you reviewed for the last chapter, I've never gotten so many and it makes writing a lot more fun cause I know what people think :) Hope you also take time to write a little review for this chapter... please? :D  
Oh and btw, I'm still planning on writing a some fluff ;)  
**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N: So sorry for the delay, I actually planned on uploading this chapter much earlier but that didn't quite work out as planned... I hope the length at least makes a little up for that because this is even longer than the last one :) And a huge thanks to everyone that reviewed the last chapter, I really appreciate it when you take the time to write something :)  
Hope you enjoy reading ;)**

* * *

She woke up even earlier than she normally did, it was only 5:30 and she wouldn't have to get to the precinct until 8. So there was enough time left that she actually could stay in bed a little longer and sleep again but the warmth of the body she was entangled with made it hard to do so, she felt way too hot. How could a single person give off so much heat? Slowly to not wake him she lifted his arm, that lay across her abdomen, and got out of bed.

Standing there, next to the sleeping figure that was her boyfriend, she couldn't stop herself from admiring him. He looked so peacefully when he slept and a lot younger, there were no wrinkles because he was worried about something, he was just peacefully asleep with a satisfied smile on his lips. What did she do to deserve such a handsome man in her life? Her thoughts went back to the last night and all her insecurities that, if she thought about it now, had been for no reason.

Of course they were different from Josh and her or Demming and her, they were Castle and Beckett, Caskett, like he had put it when they had spent the weekend in the Hamptons. At that memory a smile crossed her lips, who else would come up with such a ridiculous name for them? It kind of fitted because of the whole murder thing granted, but seriously only he would think about a couple nickname for them and could come up with something like this. Okay maybe some crazy obsessed TV-show fans would also come up with a name for their favourite couple but this wasn't an episode of Temptation Lane right?

She was just hopelessly in love with him, couldn't imagine a future without him and if she hadn't been sure that his feelings were mutual she was at least sure after his heartwarming speech yesterday. He had taken away all the worries she had come to the loft with by patiently reassuring her of his love for her. How had she ever been able to doubt that he was deeply in love with her, especially after everything he had gone through over the past 4 years just to make her see that there was no way she could live without him.

She felt bad for bothering him with her stupid insecurities. Why hadn't she thought about what he went through to finally get her before she came to the loft? That would have made the night much easier and far less embarrassing, because seriously she had had a complete meltdown right in front of him. Even though he was her boyfriend he didn't need to see that. Slowly she averted her eyes from his sleeping figure and walked towards the door carefully not to wake him.

She needed to make it up to him, to apologize for doubting their relationship was strong and she definitely needed to thank him for the patience he had when it came to reassuring her. So she decided to go to the kitchen and make breakfast hoping he had all the ingredients for the pancakes she planned on making him. Because what said more thank you for last night than pancakes, right?

Getting all the ingredients out of the fridge and cupboards she started preparing the dough for the pancakes she wanted to surprise Castle with. She really had to thank him for dealing with all her insecurities, she had been a mess when she came here the previous night, full of doubt and he was willing to reassure her, not only with words but also with what came after their talk. He had worshipped her body with every touch and had woken feelings in her that no one else knew how to wake. They had always been completely in sync, knowing exactly how to move to make each other shatter into pieces. With Castle it wasn't only sex, it had always gone deeper than that, with him it was pure lovemaking. Still, last night had been different. The slowness with which he had caressed her body, his tentative touch on her skin, she couldn't describe it but it was more than the lovemaking they had done before. She could almost still feel his fingers running down her spine when she sensed someone standing behind her.

"Detective..." Kate turned around hearing the familiar voice of her boyfriend's daughter suddenly behind her.

"Oh, Alexis..." she was trying hard to think what she should say, hoping Alexis wasn't mad over finding her in the loft, making breakfast and moving around quite domestically.

"I didn't know you were here..." the girl simply said not giving away her thoughts. She just stood a few feet away from where Kate was preparing everything for the pancakes, not even looking directly at the woman in front of her.

"Yes, I came over late last night, I needed to... your dad and I needed to... ehhr talk." she explained but stuttered because she couldn't keep the memory of how great the lovemaking after their talk had been from haunting her mind. Hopefully she wasn't blushing, that would look kind of weird because since when was a normal talk something you were blushing for?

"Oh..." was all Alexis said, still not giving away how she felt about the fact that she wasn't alone with her father this morning. Instead she stood there awkwardly trying to avoid eye-contact.

"I hope you don't mind me being here?" Kate decided it was best to not beat around the bush but to just openly ask her about what she hoped wasn't the case. So trying to sound rather casually to lessen the awkwardness the situation clearly had, why she didn't know, she asked her looking right into her eyes to see whether Alexis told her the truth or not.

"No... I... that's okay. I'll just grab a glass of water and then go back upstairs." gesturing with her hand towards the upper end of the stairs she waited a moment until she finally moved towards the cupboard taking a glass out of it.

"You know, I was making pancakes for your dad, if you want some... I'm sure there's plenty for the three of us." she offered casually hoping the girl would be more at ease when at least she acted as normal as possible.

"Oh no, thanks. I'm not hungry." Alexis replied smiling politely when she had filled her glass and walked back towards the stairs hoping Kate hadn't noticed how her stomach had grumbled when she walked past her. But she had because it wasn't like it had only been quietly, barely to hear, there was no way she could have overheard it. Why did Alexis lie to her about not being hungry? It wasn't like the two of them had never been alone before, actually they had made dinner together several times in the past. Kate had no idea of Alexis' reasons and would have liked to ask her but to make this awkward situation not even worse she didn't and pretended that she hadn't heard anything.

As soon as Alexis had disappeared upstairs Kate got back to making the pancakes, but still she couldn't stop from thinking about how awkward the encounter with the girl had been. Two days ago they had been able to talk casually and now already being in the same room was awkward? What had suddenly changed?Maybe she should ask Castle to ask his daughter if she had a problem with her. The girl would be honest to him, right? She was deep in thoughts and didn't really get anything done regarding the breakfast, so she was startled when she again heard the familiar voice if the youngest Castle behind her.

"Detective Beckett, I..." Alexis stood again a few feet away from her clearly wanting to talk this time but not really knowing what to say.

"Hey, changed your mind about the pancakes?" she smiled at her, hoping it would make Alexis feel better and give her a starting point for whatever it was she wanted to say.

"Ehhr no, I... it's just I didn't get to thank you..." Alexis said quietly not really knowing where to look because she felt rather uncomfortable looking at Kate.

"Thank me for what?" she was puzzled, what had she done that the girl needed to thank her for?

"For hearing me out before telling my dad... and for believing me that I did nothing wrong..." she explained, shifting from one foot to the other. Her eyes were now glued to the floor so she wouldn't have to face the detective directly.

"You don't have to thank me for that, I just did what I would have liked anyone else do if I was in your shoes." she smiled at her although Alexis couldn't see it when she looked down at the floor. She had only done what she thought was understood but still it felt good to hear that she had done the right thing. Even though doing the right thing had caused her a lot of trouble with Castle it had been worth it if she had acted in Alexis' interest.

"That was really nice of you... I hope you haven't gotten into trouble with my dad because of that..." slowly the girl looked up to make sure she hadn't caused any trouble between her dad and his girlfriend because that was the least thing she had wanted.

"Don't worry about that."again Kate smiled at the girl reassuringly only now she was able to look her in the eyes and make sure the girl was okay and understood that she wasn't to blame for anything that might or might not have happened between Kate and Rick.

"Still, I also have to thank you for opening my eyes about Ethan... I was so stupid to believe he changed and for helping him..." she went on explaining , now being a little more at ease and even able to return the smile Beckett gave her.

"Alexis you were in love with him. People do crazy stuff when they're in love, believe me, I know what I'm talking about." she laughed slightly at the end remembering clearly what she had done over the years due to being lovestrucked. "You know that I'm in love with your dad, some people might even say I'm hopelessly in love with him, there's nothing I wouldn't do for him. So trust me, I know exactly what you were thinking." Kate added when Alexis just looked at her questioningly but didn't say anything.

"I know you'd do anything for him... I remember you trying everything to proof his innocence when he was arrested for murder." slowly Alexis became her usual self again. It seemed as if thanking Kate and telling her how stupid she felt because of the thing with her now ex-boyfriend had been a huge relief for the girl.

"To be honest I already thought of a plan to get him out of jail..." the detective admitted truthfully.

"Really?" Alexis seemed to be surprised by that and Kate could see why. After all she was a detective with the NYPD and known for wanting to bring justice to the victims no matter who the perp was and what his motifs were.

"Yes, but my point is that love often clouds our thinking and that everyone, including me, would have fallen for Ethan's lies." she told her because there was no need to feel stupid or embarrassed, Alexis had just trusted the person she loved and who she should be able to trust, nothing wrong with that.

But Alexis didn't seem to be convinced, the girl just stared at the detective wondering whether she had told her the truth or just what she assumed would make her feel better.

"You can trust me, whenever your dad's concerned I tend to stop thinking and often do stupid things... just as an example you could take yesterday, I just wanted him to feel better and ended up saying something stupid." Kate explained hoping the girl would see the truth behind her words.

"Really? Was that why you came here last night?" the girl looked at her curiously hoping she wouldn't invade Kate's personal space. After all it actually was none of her business what led to her stopping by the loft that late.

"Part of..." Kate had no problem with telling Alexis the truth, that her lack of thinking before talking was indeed the reason for her coming.

"But you two are okay now?" the girl asked cautiously not wanting to upset the detective.

"Yes, we're fine. Your dad knows how I sometimes just act before I think about it and he's far more understanding than I deserve him to be with me..." she admitted smiling at the thought of her understanding boyfriend. She still had no clue what she had done to deserve such a good-natured man in her life.

"He has a good heart..." Alexis also smiled seeing the dreamy look on Beckett's face when she talked about Castle. For the girl there was no doubt that she really was head over heels in love with him.

"That he has..." she was still caught in her thoughts about him, smiling like a teenager, who was in love for the first time. And maybe that was right, maybe she really was in love for the first time because the feelings she had had for any other man before him was nothing compared to what she felt now.

"And he loves you, more than any other woman I've seen him with." the girl declared smiling brightly at her. Suddenly Kate felt self-conscious and didn't know what to reply. What was she supposed to say now? It felt incredibly good to not only hear from him how much he loved her but also from his daughter, who had already seen many women walking in and out of his life. But she didn't want to think about what had happened in the past, how many women exactly had there been, because for her the past didn't matter anymore, her future with Castle was what was important now.

"So you want some pancakes now?" she finally asked after several minutes of silence.

"Yes, I'm a little hungry..." Alexis nodded grateful for being asked again.

"That I've noticed. I just couldn't stop from hearing your stomach grumble earlier..." she said winking as the girl turned a bright red. "No need to blush, it's okay." she added then to comfort her.

"Shall I help you with the dough?" Alexis asked to distract not only Kate from her lie earlier but also herself from dwelling on how embarrassing this was.

"Sure." and with that they went on making breakfast for the three of them, well three if Castle would join them within the next half an hour.

* * *

They had just finished with the pancakes when the delicious smell lured Castle out of his bedroom. Standing in the doorway of his office he watched the two woman making the last pancake and putting the pan in the sink for washing up later. He admired how casually Kate moved around his daughter, she really wasn't like any other of his girlfriends. The other ones had always ignored his daughter and kept their distance unless of course they had been aware that he was watching them, then they had tried to make an effort to include Alexis in everything, just to impress him. Sure Gina had tried several times to bond with her but he hadn't wanted it and known how to prevent it because well she was Gina. Not the kind of female role model you would want for your child. Kate on the other hand was everything he could wish for as a role model for Alexis, his daughter could look up to the detective without him having to fear.

Smiling happily he walked over to the kitchen to also get one of those deliciously smelling pancakes, who knows if they would leave something for him of he didn't immediately make sure to get one. "Mmmhhh that smells delicious." he said drawing Kate's and Alexis' attention towards him as he looked at the plate with the still warm breakfast.

"Dad!" the girl turned around as she heard him and walked from the table, she had just prepared for breakfast with three plates and silverware, over to him Su she could give him a good-morning-kiss on the cheek.

"Morning, pumpkin. Slept well in your old bed?" he asked hugging his daughter while Kate just watched the two interact with a smile on her face while she put all the ingredients she didn't need anymore back where they belonged.

"Perfectly." she replied stepping away from her father smiling happily and took the plate with the pancakes from the counter where Kate had left it.

While his daughter brought the pancakes to the table he quietly walked up to his girlfriend, who was putting the flour back in the cupboard, until he stood right behind her and could clasp his arms around her waist, inhaling the familiar scent of her shampoo. "Mhh I missed you when I woke up..." he whispered into her ear, his warm breath on her skin giving her goose bumps.

"I was too hot in bed and you slept so peacefully, I didn't want to wake you." she told him leaning her head against his chest and smiled.

"Mhh you really are hot..." he smirked placing open-mouthed kisses on her neck. He just couldn't resist her. Everything about her made him want to carry her back into the bedroom and not getting out of bed for the rest of the day.

"You know what I meant."she chuckled at the typical Castle response and slapped his arm slightly when she turned to face him.

"Do I?" he asked innocently but couldn't hide the immense smirk on his face. She made him forget everything, even the problems with his daughter, that had been solved less than 24 hours ago, were completely forgotten now.

"Yes and before you say anymore, your daughter's here, remember?" with her head Kate motioned towards the table where Alexis was already comfortable seated and eating a pancake.

"Oh you're right." looking in the direction his girlfriend had indicated he sobered momentarily as he saw his daughter. Right, he should stop right there or this might get a little embarrassing in front of his daughter. So taking Kate's hand he led her to the table and sat down opposite his daughter and with his girlfriend next to him.

"These pancakes are really good Kate." Alexis said smiling after she had swallowed the last bite. Kate appreciated the girl's words and was just about to thank her and explain that she used to make them with her mother every sunday morning, when Castle already cut in.

"Better than mine?" he exclaimed in mock horror and caused Kate to immediately roll her eyes and chuckle.

"Noooo, of course yours are way better..." she replied smirking widely, but as soon as she had finished the sentence she mouthed towards Kate "you're totally kicking his ass in making pancakes."

"Hey, I saw that!" he exclaimed looking from one woman to the other, thinking how right this felt. It was as if they were a real little loving family that had breakfast together.

"Good." was all that Kate replied but the huge grin told everything she hadn't said.

"Are you two seriously ganging up on me?" his voice was unusually high and he looked disbelievingly from Kate to Alexis, hoping his daughter would change her mind and back him up.

"Sorry dad, it's just the truth. She really does kick your ass here..." she tried to look as innocently as possible when she shrugged.

"Actually I kick your ass in so many things, you would think you had already gotten used to it..." Kate teased him.

"What...?" he exclaimed higher than normal and tried to convince the two woman that he had no idea what his girlfriend was talking about.

"And I recall you rather liking it last night..." smiling mischievously she raised an eyebrow at him.

"Okay... I guess that's my cue to leave..." Alexis blushed and was on her feet faster than Kate and Rick could realize. Quickly she took her plate, placed it in the sink and was up the stairs.

"Looks like I scared your daughter off..." Kate could barely hold the chuckle back that she was on the verge to release when she looked directly in the face of her boyfriend who didn't seem to get what just had happened.

"Don't worry, she's heard and even seen worse..." he said when he had finally gathered himself and drifted up into thoughts about all the things Alexis already had to deal with thanks to him not paying attention to whether she was around or not.

"Do I even want to know?" she watched him completely lost in his thoughts and although the detective in her demanded to know what exactly he meant she decided to ignore the urge to ask because she knew she wouldn't want to know the answer.

"Nah." he shook his head no chuckling a little self-consciously.

"So... pancakes?" he asked after a minute raising his eyebrows.

"Yes... I thought it would kind of fit the situation... you know, to thank you for last night..." she explained smiling shyly.

"And here I thought it was me who needed to thank you for 'kicking my ass' last night." he mimicked quotation marks with his hands as he grinned at her.

"Mhh I know how you can thank me for that..." she replied looking at Castle from under her long eyelashes causing inside of him the urge to touch her immediately. There was no way he could keep his hands to himself, so his Hand found its way to her knee and wandering up her thigh. "After breakfast..." she added and removed his hand, getting the reaction from him she had already expected. He pouted like a little boy whose favourite toy had been locked away. That little minx, he thought.

"Oh come on, you can wait a little longer." she patted his knee in an attempt to reassure him and went on with eating the pancake on her plate.

"Looks like I've got no choice..." he grumbled still sulking but also got back to the work at hand, eating. And that not in the delicious slow pace his girlfriend was teasing him with right now but more in a gulping kind of way. After all she had said after breakfast so the sooner he was finished here the sooner he would get to the fun part.

"So, did you know your daughter was feeling like she had to thank me for what I've done?" Kate asked after a minute of boldly ignoring his sulking.

"No I didn't know... did she tell you that?" he frowned slightly but his interest was peeked.

"Yes but I told her she didn't have to thank me because I've only done what I thought would be best for her. Oh and I hope you don't mind me comforting her because she fell for Ethan's lies...?" she explained a little unsure if she had done the right thing or if she had just cleared the way for their next argument.

"No that's fine, what did you tell her?" he appeased her with a smile.

"Just that you can't think clear when you're in love and do the craziest things. I wanted her to know that everyone in her situation would have believed him and that there's nothing to be ashamed of." she told him.

Something like that not even Alexis' mother would have managed to say to her, so Castle admired Kate for it. And hadn't she just yesterday practically indicated something like she wouldn't be a good mother? Well look who was wrong once again, no one else than the keen-witted detective Kate Beckett, who usually always knew everything better than her partner.

"That was really motherly of you..." he said smiling at her, still totally in awe.

"But I'm not a mother." she simply stated not really sure how to react. That had been a compliment, right? He certainly thought her conversation with his daughter was another example for how good she can handle things with kids and why he would always trust her with Alexis well-being.

"Not yet." he corrected her smiling widely.

"Why Mr. Castle are you planning on knocking me up?" she raised an eyebrow amused but trying to keep the smile from her face. Somehow the thought of him knocking her up caused her whole body to tingle and joy to flow through every fiber of her being. Where was Kate Beckett and what had he done to her? No need to let him know she couldn't wait until she finally carried his baby inside of her.

"Oh yes, I definitely plan on doing so..." if it was even possible his grin got bigger. He just loved this banter between the two if them. "...but I still have some time until then." he added only to make sure Kate wouldn't freak out and run for the hills because he was moving too fast for her liking. After all you have to consider that it took her 4 years until she could finally admit she was in love with him.

"So how about we go practice a little...?" she suggested seductively and wasn't the least surprised when Rick got up faster than ever, took her hand and led her towards the bedroom.

It was hard and he needed a lot of self-control to not start anything right there at the table but make his way through half the loft until they reached their destination, the bed. Needless to say that the door was barely closed for a second when he began his assault. Turning around his lips found hers in a hard and passionate kiss.

The deep groan of desire that escaped him when her hands were roaming his body went straight to her core and intensified everything she had felt before. Since she had woken up this morning just the thought of repeating their nightly activities had driven her crazy. Thank god she had a lot of self-control because otherwise they would have landed in bed much earlier. As soon as he had entered the kitchen, to be precise. But even though it had been really tough she had ignored the urge and that not only because it would have been a little embarrassing on front of Alexis to drag her father back to bed but also because it was just too entertaining to tease him and watch how he slowly loses the fight against himself.

Soon his hand found his way under the huge shirt she wore and that actually belonged to him. She had way too much clothes on for his liking and he was only too willing to help her getting rid of them. But fortune wasn't on their behalf because he was just about to remove her shirt when the ringing of her phone interrupted them. Of course the caller ID said nothing else but 12th precinct and therefore she just had to answer it.

"Beckett." she tried to keep the frustration from her voice but did a crappy job. Fortunately no one knew she was at Castle's so they were assuming her frustration came from being called in earlier than she had expected.

Listening for a few more seconds she rolled her eyes and somehow Castle knew that wasn't a good sign for their morning-sex plans.

"Okay, see you in half an hour." then she put down the phone turning to Castle.

"We've got to go. The boys found Trey Hughes." she said .

"But we were just about to..." the look on his face could be easily compared to a lost puppy. Yes, he had known her eye-roll was a bad sign.

"I know Castle, but that's life. Not everything goes according to how you planned it." she tried to sound lighter than she felt because inside the frustration was almost killing her again.

"In my books these kind of things always work out as planned..." he mumbled.

"Too bad this isn't one of your books. Listen I'll take a shower and no, you can't join me, that would only take us longer." she said and kissed him slowly hoping he would feel better then. But it didn't. When she went into the bathroom he was still sulking and cursing the boys for interrupting. Why for god's sake did they have to find Hughes right now? Why not in an hour?

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**Okay I know now where I want to end this story and I think there are 3 or so chapters left now... But please let me know what you thought of this one so the following chapters will be uploaded faster. Remember reviews make writing much easier because I know if I'm doing well with this story ;)**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N: I know it's been some time since I've uploaded the last chapter, life was pretty stressful the last weeks so I didn't really find the time to write anything. Also it was kind of hard to write this chapter because I wanted to go on with the case and writing case related stuff was actually more difficult than I'd initially thought but here's what I got so far and I hope you guys like it. Oh and thank you to the one (!) person who found the time to review the last chapter, I really appreciate it :)**

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It didn't take long until Castle and Beckett left the loft and got into a cab taking them to her appartement where her cruiser was still parked. She had almost forgotten that it was still there and that she hadn't driven to the loft by herself last night so Castle had gently reminded her when she was about to press the button for the parking lot. Somehow it had already become normal over the last months to ride the elevator down there every morning, it was almost as if she already felt at home in the loft, not that she would ever admit it.

During the ride in the cab he had been rather quiet, still not completely over the fact that he had been cockblocked by Ryan and Esposito but as soon as they sat in their usual car his frustration began to fade away. With all his strength he tried to concentrate on the hope that they might close the case today so that he would be able to take his beautiful girlfriend home at a decent hour and carry on right where they had left off this morning.

"You're okay Castle?" she asked genuinely concerned about his uncommon silent self.

"Mmhhmm..." he replied nodding slowly not even trying to sound convincingly because he knew she would notice anyways.

"I promise I'll make tonight worth your wait." she said mischievously looking at him from under her thick eyelashes and placing a hand on his knee. Of course she knew that her touch together with her look and promise would lift his spirits so she wasn't surprised at all when the shine in his eyes, that could only be compared to the one of a kid on christmas morning, returned just in time so they could get out of the car and face the other two detectives without them being somehow suspicious of why Castle was in such a bad mood.

Stepping into the precinct they were already awaited by Ryan and Esposito, who smiled proudly because they had managed what just a day ago neither one of the detectives had thought was possible, they had found their prime suspect. And that without the help of Beckett, now dare anyone ever say again she was the best detective the NYPD had to offer because without their help she wouldn't have caught their suspect yet and that definitely proved something, didn't it?

"What do you have?" she immediately asked as soon as she and Castle had reached her desk, looking expectantly at her two colleagues. They had better already have Hughes in custody so she would just need to go into interrogation and get a confession out of him. Because otherwise she wouldn't have had to hurry up that morning and get ready within 15 minutes and most importantly she would have had enough time to finish what she had started with Castle. Even if she didn't want to admit it to herself, and much less to anyone else, she was frustrated and looking at Castle standing beside her it was a safe bet to say they had reached the same level of frustration over being interrupted mid foreplay.

"We know where Trey Hughes is." Ryan stated proudly, smiling satisfied as he looked from Beckett to Castle, not noticing that the look the writer gave him was deadly.

"Great and why aren't you on the way to pick him up?" she might have sounded a little more annoyed than she had intended to and seeing the smile on the irish detective's face fade she felt kind of bad for not having her voice a little more under control. Of course they had just called her in to let her know they knew Hughes whereabouts and hadn't been able to wait until they had already brought him in for interrogation.

"Because he's already in custody. Uniforms arrested him when he smashed his bar to bits in the middle of the night." Esposito informed her when Ryan didn't manage to say another word.

"Why would he do that?" Castle chimed in trying to see any sense in their suspect's behaviour but failed to find one, just like Beckett did. Which bar owner would destroy his own property? Only one with a really good reason. But what reason could be so good that it was worth the destruction of his bar?

"Looks like he somehow heard that, and I quote, the crumpet with the nice ass who works for him had to get rid of some cops and when she didn't answer her phone he got a little unhappy..." Ryan explained looking down at the folder he held to get Hughes' wording right.

"So when can we talk to him?" Beckett asked without acknowledging how snidely Hughes obviously talked about Crystal or most likely women in general.

"Uniforms will bring him up here in about an hour..." Esposito informed her.

"Then why are we already here?" Castle exclaimed, almost whining and looked from Esposito to Ryan. Did they really want to tell him that it would have been early enough if he and Kate would had come in an hour later? Seriously, he could have had the morning he had wanted to have? They had to be kidding him. This was so not fair.

"Why Castle, you've got something better to do?" Ryan asked chuckling at the writer's childish behaviour.

"In a matter of fact I actually have..." he mumbled frustrated and with a much saying look turned towards Beckett, who was still standing beside him.

In his mind he already started to undress her and dragged her into one of the interrogation rooms to continue right where Esposito and Ryan had interrupted them not even an hour ago. God he had to get it together, he couldn't just drag Beckett into an interrogation room, although the thought of fulfilling that fantasy was kind of appealing. No he couldn't, he had to think of the possibility that someone, well lets be honest, most likely his favourite detectives beside his girlfriend, were in the observation room and he definitely didn't want to give them the full show.

And with that thought another one occurred to him. If he would disappear with Kate into an interrogation room and the boys would go into the observation room out of pure curiosity only to find him having his way with Kate, how likely was it Lanie would soon join them? No he definitely didn't want to find out because Lanie would never let him live that one down if she would join Ryan and Esposito. So interrogation room was off-limits. What about a supply closet?

If she hadn't been thinking the exact same thing that he had voiced she might have been able to cover his obvious sultry look that practically screamed 'where can we go to put the next hour to good use?' but unfortunately that wasn't the case and instead of keeping cool and replying some teasing words she turned crimson. As the good detectives Ryan and Esposito were they immediately picked up on what was going on and smirked knowingly. Great, she thought, could this morning get any more embarrassing?

"Ohhh, so we interrupted the two of you..." Esposito stated amused as he motioned between Beckett and Castle and didn't have tow wait long for their reply.

"Yes!" "No!"they said simultaneously causing Beckett to turn towards Castle, her mouth ajar. Why did he always have the need to tell people things that should remain private? When would he finally learn to keep his mouth shut? Right, never! She groaned in frustration inwardly as she shot her boyfriend her best Beckett-glare.

"I think I need a coffee now." she stated and walked past the men towards the break room and her much needed dose of caffeine, leaving Castle pondering over whether he should follow her or better stay with the boys, who were barely trying to contain their chuckle.

"Oh oh, seems like someone's in trouble..." Ryan said grinning, completely amused by the thought of how much his truthful answer to Esposito' s question had gotten into trouble.

"You might want to follow her, try to appease her..." Esposito suggested looking in the direction Beckett had headed off in.

"Right..." and with that Rick started to move towards the break room hoping he hadn't put his chance of getting lucky that evening at risk. He should really think before talking, that might proof to be much wiser, especially where his and Kate's relationship was concerned.

Slowly he stepped through the door and found Kate standing at the coffee maker trying to figure out how to use it. She seriously hadn't used it once since he had bought it for the department, no wonder that she had no clue what to do to fill the cup with coffee.

"Let me help you with that." he stepped forward realizing that this was possibly the best opportunity to earn some brownie points. Taking the cup out of her hand and smiling at her he toom over and began to work his magic with the coffee maker. Kate just watched him not saying anything but knowing exactly what he was trying to do. "Here you go." he said smiling as he handed her the coffee just like she loved it.

"Thank you." she took the up from him but her eyes never left his. She observed the hopeful look in his eyes and knew he was searching for a smile on her face but found none.

"Sooooo..." he started unsure of how to go on with the sentence, why hadn't he thought about that before? Again probably because he just couldn't stop from jabber right away. Was she mad at him or did she just try to punish him exactly for that, his lack of thinking before talking?

"So what?" she asked raising her eyebrows in question as if she had no clue what he wanted to know.

"Uhm... Nothing..." he mumbled. Well that went great didn't it? What was it that made it so difficult to tell her that he was sorry and asking her if she was mad?

"Mmhh okay." with that she turned around as if she wanted to walk back into the bullpen, hoping he wouldn't notice the corners of her mouth twitching upwards. It was too funny to keep him in suspense, this amusing game really never got old. But somehow she began to pity him and stopped in her tracks.

"Okay I'm sorry for what happened, but you know I can't keep my mouth shut. Please please don't be mad at me Kate." he exclaimed and what happened next was something he hadn't expected at all. Kate chuckled. She actually chuckled and turned around barely able to hold back the loud laugh that was trying to escape her. She was laughing at him. Why was she laughing?

"Oh you should have seen your face. The look was priceless, it really never gets old to let you try to ramble your way out of something." she took a few steps towards him until she could lay her hands on both his cheeks and smiled.

"So... You're not mad?" he asked hesitantly only to make sure he didn't misinterpret the whole situation and was met with a nod. "Does that mean tonight's still on?" he couldn't hide his huge grin.

Of course he was only thinking about that, men! Rolling her eyes at his stupid grin she left the break room to get to work, there was still a few things she would have to do until Hughes was brought in for interrogation.

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The hour flew by and before Castle could get any other ideas of dragging her into various rooms to use the time they still had left with other things than work their suspect arrived.

"Hey boss, they put him in interrogation room 3." Esposito told her and got back to his work.

Collecting all the things necessary for questioning Trey Hughes she stood up and walked towards the interrogation rooms, Castle following her as always. But laying her hand on the door knob she hesitated and finally turned around.

"Castle I think I'm going in there alone." she stated looking at her rather confused seeming boyfriend. "I just think it's more likely he'll talk when I'm alone with him. He doesn't seem to see women as an equal and therefore won't even think about whether it's clever to say something or not." she answered his unvoiced question.

"You think he'll indirectly admit to the murder because he thinks he's much cleverer than a woman. I like your way of thinking." Castle said. Seeing this guy feel save and underestimate Beckett, something no one should ever do, that would be fun to watch he thought and disappeared into the observation room.

When she entered the room she was totally calm and slowly walked over to the chair opposite their suspect, not acknowledging him at all. Pretending to acquaint herself with the case she flipped through the file and turned a few pages until she finally raised her eyes to look at him, still not saying a word.

"Mr. Hughes do you know why you're here?" she asked after a while of staring silently at him.

"The other cops said something about me being more dangerous than they'd initially thought." he answered calmly taking in every little detail about Beckett.

"We found the body of a young man earlier this week." she said watching him intently for anything that might give away he knew what she was talking about.

"And what does that have to do with me?" he asked unimpressed.

"We've got a witness that connects you to our victim." she explained certain that she was facing their perp.

"Mhpf. That doesn't mean anything, you can check my alibi." Hughes shrugged self-confidently and was gloating over the fact that Beckett had no hard evidence against him.

"Really, you've got an alibi?" she looked doubtfully at him raising an eye-brow. This guy thought he was so clever although he actually had just given away he had done something she shouldn't know about. Because why would an innocent man with a good conscience have prepared an alibi?

"Yes I have one." he still didn't notice his mistake and misjudged the situation completely. He was more than sure he would walk out of the precinct without Beckett having been able to prove his guild.

"How can you be so sure to have an alibi when you don't even know when the murder took place?" somehow it was quite amusing to see the smirk on Hughe's face slowly fade as realization of his mistake sank in. "Why don't you just admit to having killed Daniel Morrison?" she had enough of Hughes playing dumb.

"I don't even know this Daniel Morrison, so why would I kill him?" he argued once he gathered his thoughts and decided how to reply.

"Because he interfered with your drug business at Columbia when he helped Ethan Cutler getting clean and stop dealing. You couldn't lose your best dealer at the college, could you? So you surprised Morrison in the warehouse in the early hours of Thursday morning and decided to get rid of him." Kate stated looking the man deep in the eyes.

"Nice theory you've got there but I was at the bar, my stupid whore of a bartender decided just the night before that she wouldn't work for me anymore, said something about college was more important than spending all night in my bar." the self-satisfied smirk appeared again on his face as he was able to inform her of his alibi. "I'm sure there are a dozen people who can confirm it. Doesn't happen too often that I've got to work in my bar, usually I'm just there to supervise my employees and have fun with the guest, the female ones, you know..." with a shady smirk on his face he eyed Beckett from head to toe, stopping where her long curls met her breast.

"Anyone in particular that can confirm your whereabouts for the time of the murder?" she asked with raised eyebrows, ignoring Hughes obviously checking her out.

"The regular customers that come almost everyday." he answered, his eyes still fixed on her body. She had known he had an alibi for the time frame in which Morrison had been killed, Ethan had already mentioned that Hughes wouldn't do it himself but probably hire someone.

"And do they also have names?" Beckett got a little impatient not to mention sick of the look with which he eyed her. She was sure that if Castle was in the room he would have smacked Hughes already just to make clear that she belonged to him and no one else was to look at her like that, like he was picturing her naked.

"Tony... And Michael, ehhhr... And Sam... Oh and Lenny..." he immediately began to list as his eyes slowly wandered up again towards her face.

"I suppose you don't know the surnames?" actually it wasn't a question, she knew he didn't know them but it was interesting how fast he shot out the first name. Tony. Maybe the one he'd paid for getting rid of his little problem?

"No I don't but I'm sure that you'll meet them in my bar this evening." he said standing up from the chair he had been sitting on. "If that's all I'll go now. The bar needs to open tonight , so there's a lot to take care of since my bar isn't in the best shape for opening." he added.

"Don't leave the town Mr. Hughes." she remembered him already thinking about what their next step would be. She would send Esposito and Ryan to keep an eye on him, maybe he was planning on meeting this Tony or who ever was the one to actually kill Morrison.

"Oh I won't and I'm sure I wouldn't be able to even if I wanted because you'll certainly keep me under surveillance." and with that he was out the door and on his way to the elevator.

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In the observation room Castle had watched everything and had smiled to himself as Kate began to show Hughes how clever she actually was. His girlfriend really was extraordinary, he could have stood there forever watching how she grilled perps in that room. He was almost grateful for having to watch from the other room, apparently just admiring her had become one of his favourite things to do. When did that happen?

As soon as Hughes was out of sight he joined Beckett, who was still sitting in the interrogation room.

"You let him go..." he stated standing in the doorway watching her.

"He didn't do it." she explained matter of factly but didn't move to acknowledge the presence of her partner. She was still thinking about what their next move would be, about how they would get to the real killer so not only Hughes but also the person that had looked Morrison in the eyes as he killed him would get what they deserved, a lifetime in jail.

"I know... He hired someone." Castle knew it just as well as she had known it.

"Did you notice how fast he could tell me the first name of the regular customers?" she turned her head to look at him as she waited for him to confirm her assumption.

"Tony... Yes that came a little too fast for my liking..." he said after a few seconds of thinking about it again. It actually had been more than weird considering how slowly he had remembered the other names.

"Could be our killer..." she voiced her suspicion.

"That Hughes paid to take care of Morrison." he said ending her thought.

"Right." she nodded.

"But how do we find out whether this Tony is our guy or not? " he frowned thinking about the same thing that had Kate ponder.

"I don't know yet but I'll send Ryan and Esposito to keep an eye on him. Maybe he's stupid enough to just meet with this Tony and discuss their business..." she knew it was a long shot, Hughes wouldn't be that stupid, would he? Because even though he wasn't the brightest bulb he did know something about covering up his illegal business and most likely he wouldn't make such a mistake.

"Well maybe we're lucky..." he commented trying to sound hopeful but failed. He knew that they would need some sort of miracle to wrap this case that easily and from his own experience he knew that those miracles did only happen when either Kate or he, sometimes also both of them, were in huge danger.

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**That's it, maybe this chapter gets a little more attention from you? I'd like to know what you think of this chapter. Also I think there are only about two chapters left for this story, maybe three, depends on how writing the end of the case and Jim scene I planned work out.**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N: I know I'm terrible at updating this story (I can't believe that almost a month has passed since the last chapter was posted) but lately I don't really feel like writing much of this story... I hope there are still some people reading and liking this?!  
Anyways, enjoy reading :)**

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As the day went on both Beckett and Castle were hoping that Esposito and Ryan would come up with something during their observation of Trey Hughes but soon they had to acknowledge that Hughes was by far cleverer than they had thought. He had gone straight to his bar just like he had told them he would and never left the building since. Also no one else, who could have been the ominous Tony, had entered the bar.

There had only been a few blonde college girls and two rather intimidated seeming boys, that didn't look like they were capable of a cold-blooded murder. Considering drowning as the cause of death Lanie had found out after examining Morrison and the fact that the victim was obviously killed right where they had found him in the warehouse, definitely indicated that the killer had water boarded him until Morrison hadn't been able to breathe anymore and swallowed so much water that he drowned. Not really how you picture a young college boy with not much self-confidence killing someone.

"This is frustrating..." Castle exclaimed after a while sitting in his chair next to Beckett's desk. He had known that it would have been a miracle if Trey Hughes had led them straight to their killer but still the hope had been there. There was nothing he would like more to do than to wrap up this case as fast as possible and never think about it again. This case had brought up so many things he would be glad to never be remembered of. From the fighting with Kate, over having to realize his little girl wasn't as innocent as he had always thought and the disappointment he had felt over that fact and her behavior, to seeing Jim Beckett leaving the bar of their suspect, most likely because he had a relapse and started drinking again. Yes, he would love nothing more than to just forget about all of that, so where was the miracle when he needed one?

"I know Castle, but unfortunately not everything is as easy as it is in one of your books... Thought you've already learned that." she looked from her computer over to him. The last hour or so she had been going through all records she could find of Hughes, from the numbers he had called over the past month, to his facebook profile, hoping to find something that connected him to a man called Tony, Anthony, or any other name that could be cut short to Tony but so far nothing had popped up and it really sucked.

"Hey, my books aren't that easy. Nikki's always faced with problems when investigating..." he pretended to be deeply offended by what she had indicated, hoping it would make her smile. Even if she hadn't looked at him he would have known that this was just as frustrating for her than it was for him. Her whole posture told him she was near desperation and close to acting on it.

"And you know what makes this even more frustrating? In about an hour we've to let Crystal Brooks go although I'm pretty sure she'll do something inconsiderately." "she told him pressing the heels of her hands to her eyes. This case really gave her a headache. Why couldn't this be at least a little easier? Granted there had been a lot harder cases to crack and she had managed to get through it but somehow this case affected her much more. Was it only because Alexis had been part of the investigation? Kate supposed that it must be the reason but still, it felt weird after all the girl was no longer important for solving the murder now that they knew she didn't know anything about Hughes or who he might have hired to kill Morrison. The only girl rather important right now was sitting in the cell where Kate had put her to stop her from doing anything stupid.

"You really think she'd be capable of... you know... killing him?" Castle asked thinking back to the previous day and about what Chris had said. She had been clear about how less she thought of the NYPD and that she wasn't going to help them.

"I really don't know what she's capable of.. maybe she won't but she desperately wants Hughes to suffer for what happened to Morrison and as long as she doesn't trust us to bring him to justice I think she's erratic." she told him, trying to figure out what she would do if she was in the girl's shoes. And she had to admit, if it was Castle being killed there would be no way she wouldn't get revenge for the murder. She would make sure the killer would suffer. But on the other hand she had also always thought that if she met the man responsible for her mother's murder she would take the law into her own hands and let him die the same excruciating death her mother had to die. And that wasn't really what happened when she had faced Bracken earlier that year. So who knows if Chris was actually going through with her plan.

"I know what you mean... she seemed so determined yesterday..." somehow it had reminded him a lot of Kate in certain situations. It really seemed as if the girl was as stubborn as Beckett when she had decided what to do, when no one could change her mind. "Can't you put a surveillance detail on her? Make sure she doesn't do anything stupid?" he suggested, looking hopeful at her.

"As appealing as that sounds I don't think that's an option... the NYPD is short on people, besides I have no idea how to justify that to Gates. We can't keep an eye on everyone who might commit a crime..." she had to tell him, knowing exactly why he had suggested it. The thought that a young girl might throw away her whole life by acting on an impulse in the heat of the moment didn't sit right with her either.

"But maybe we'll get a confession just by letting Crystal being watched... I'm sure she'll confront him one way or another, so when you put her under surveillance we'll stand a chance to catch Hughes..." he says after a few minutes of silence, in which he tried to find a solution for their problem because he couldn't stop thinking that Crystal wasn't that much older than his own daughter and seeing her make a mistake that she most likely would regret her entire life wasn't what he wanted.

"You actually think it's that easy? We would have to bring Crystal to work with us to get his confession on tape so we've got some real evidence against him. But I doubt she'll be willing to help us..." she clarified but wished she wouldn't be right.

"Let me talk to her... I don't know if you knew that but I can be pretty persuasive..." he told her grinning widely as he wiggled his eyebrows.

"Oh don't kid yourself, your not that persuasive." she said rolling her eyes, no need to give his ego any more fuel to grow. "But if you want to try I won't stop you..." she went on as she saw the disappointed look on his face and as soon as she saw how his eyes started to light up she couldn't stop the smile from appearing on her face.

* * *

Okay so he could do this, he could talk to Chris. She was just a girl mourning the loss of her boyfriend, no need for him to be nervous. He would just explain the situation to her and make her see the advantages of helping the NYPD, it would all work out just like he had planned it. At least that's what he tried to make himself believe. Because what was really going on was that his legs were barely supported the weight of his body as he walked towards the break room where Ryan and brought the girl after releasing her out of the cell they had held her.

"Castle you know this is probably our only chance to get Hughes... If Crystal doesn't agree to helping us we've got nothing..." Kate had made clear before he had turned around and started walking away from her desk. And although he had known this before hearing her say it out loud hadn't done anything to calm his nerves. In fact she had just made it worse because now he realized that the pressure was all on him, not on the two of them. He was alone in this and now he had to begrudgingly admit that he wasn't made for being a detective, way too much pressure.

"Crystal...ehr... Did detective Ryan tell you I wanted to talk to you?" he asked afer closing the door behind him.

They were alone in the room, the blinds were shut so no one could watch them from the bullpen. Both Beckett and Castle had decided that it would be better that way because from how the girl had reacted as soon as the topic cops came up a certain distance to the detectives couldn't be the worst thing and also it would mean there was a bigger chance for Castle of being successful.

"Yes and I'm dying to know what this is all about." she stood at the other end of the room looking af him cross-armed waiting for an explanation with an eyebrow raised.

"Well... Why don't we sit down..." he said hesitantly pointing at the couch a few feet away from him. God he was really terrible at this and had no idea what he was actually doing alone in this room with the girl. "You want a coffee?" he asked trying to smooth the air between them to get to a neutral start before diving into what he really wanted.

"I'm not in the mood for a cozy little coffee party, so why don't you just tell me why I'm still here and not on my way to the bar?" the girl simply said not moving from the spot where she stood and waited for an explanation from Castle.

"Okay... So I get that you want to see Trey Hughes getting what he deserves for hiring someone to kill Morrison but you can't just take the law into your own hands." he told her taking a few steps in her direction deciding that he didn't want a coffee either. It was best to get this done as soon as possible so he would know for sure if he had ruined what most likely was the only chance to catch the mad behind the murder. "Detective Beckett out there wants to put him behind bars but she needs your help. We don't have any evidence that ties him to the murder..." he went on pointing towards the bullpen when Chris didn't say anything and just started at him.

"And what do I have to do with that?" she finally asked unfazed.

"You could help us... All you need to do is meet Hughes and let the detectives record it..." that's it, he had said it and now it wasn't in his power anymore whether she would help them or not.

"And why would I do that?" the girl raised again an eyebrow as she waited for him to answer and if he was honest with himself he didn't have a good reason why she should.

"Because if you don't, if you try to do this your way you'll probably do something you'll regret and I really don't want to see that happen..." he watched her intently and hoped she would see in his eyes that he was telling the truth.

The emotional approach was the only thing that came to his mind and might change how she felt about working with NYPD. Even though he barely knew the girl there was something inside of him that made him care about her. Maybe it was because she wasn't much older than Alexis or maybe it was because he knew she had no one, he wasn't sure. But letting her know that there was someone who cared about her would certainly be good, right? Everyone wants to know that there are people out there that do not want them to throw away their life in the heat of one moment, Chris wasn't an exception was she?

"Well too bad that I'd rather risk doing something stupid than actually working with the cops." she stated firmly not shying away from keeping the eye-contact with the writer. "So if that's all I think I'm going to go now." she passed Castle on her way to the door before he could even realize that he had failed and form a reply.

That was it. She had made a decision and it wasn't the one he had hoped for. Seems like he wasn't that persuasive after all. Not even his emotional approach had been successful. "You don't want to throw your life away Crystal..." he pleaded one last time as she was almost out the door.

"Just like you said, it's my life. So it's my decision what I'm going to do with it, I can do whatever I want to with it." she told him, turning around again to look him in the eyes so he would get the message. He wasn't in the place to tell her anything. And she didn't need him to feel sorry or whatever it was that made him care about her. Then she left.

As soon as the girl was out the door Castle sank down on the couch, head in his hands trying to silence the voices in his head telling him what a huge disappointment he was when it came to police work. He had been so sure he would get through to the girl. Normally he was good at this, at talking to women. His whole life he has been surrounded by them, his mother, his daughter, his girlfriend. He should know how to handle them. But apparently he didn't.

It didn't take much of his writer imagination to think of his mother's scolding. "Richard since when do you know how to handle women? You've got two ex-wives that still define your life." yes he could hear his mother far too clearly for his liking. And although it didn't sit with his ego he had to admit she was kind of right. While he would never cut Meredith completely out of his life, no matter how often she had jumped into bed with her director or producer or any other man that hadn't been him, because in the end she would always be Alexis' mother, he could have easily found a new publisher after his second marriage had failed.

But instead he chose to keep on working with Gina and had to deal with her constantly because she had assured him that working together would be no problem and since they had done so in the past he had been naïve enough to believe her. So looking back at his life you might want to correct his previous statement and say the women know how to handle him. Yes, that was more like it. He was the one being handled, first by Meredith, then by Gina and well let's be honest now by Beckett. So why again did he think he could persuade Chris better than Kate could? This was really frustrating.

"Hey..." Kate tentatively said sitting down next to him. He hadn't heard her coming in but how could he, after all his thoughts hadn't left the slightest chance to pay attention to what was going on around him.

"I failed..." was all he managed to whisper, he couldn't even bring himself to look her in the eyes.

"You did your best..." she said leaning against him and putting an arm around him. "You actually managed to talk to her for about 5 whole minutes. Believe me I wouldn't have had so much time... She would have walked out on me much sooner..." she tried to make him feel better knowing how he must feel now. But it was important that he knew she didn't blame him for it, he had been brave enough to take the risk although he had known that it was very likely that he wouldn't have any success and she appreciated his attempt.

"But I thought I would get to her... I know how to handle teenage girls... I'm a father, I should have been able to make her see what a huge mistake she's going to make..." he was disappointed in himself and it seemed as if nothing Kate could say would change that.

"That has nothing to do with it Rick. Crystal isn't like Alexis, she's blinded by the anger she feels..." Kate knew only too well how angry it could make a person when a beloved one was murdered. "I think through her whole life there have been only very few people who cared about her... And one of them is now dead..." she tried to explain.

"But her parents should've cared about her." he said turning his head so he could look his girlfriend in the eyes. "Well sometimes parents don't... Sometimes they are emotionally unable to care for someone else than themselves..." she whispered, the sadness clearly visible in her eyes.

He knew without a doubt that she must be thinking about her father and how he had gotten drunk everyday after her mother's death because he hadn't known how else to deal with the pain. How he had been unable to care about her because the feelings of the loss were too much to deal with. She had been all alone with her own pain and had been forced to helplessly watch how she slowly lost her father to the alcohol. Castle wanted for her to never have to feel this helpless again. He was reminded of what he had witnessed in front of the bar, Jim Beckett had been there most likely to drink. Had the time really come that Kate would have to face this problem of her father's past again? If so he would be there for her, support her, do whatever it takes to make her feel better. But to be able to do that he would need to prepare himself for what was to come. The only question remaining was how to do it.

"Maybe you should go home... I'm sure Alexis can take your mind off of all this." she gave him one of the smiles he loved so much, but it couldn't hide the sadness that was still lingering in her eyes caused by her earlier words. "I'll meet you there when I'm done here."

"You're right... I think I'll just go." he needed to get out of there, doing something to take his mind off of the fact that their case against Hughes was now over due to the lack of evidence against him. "I'll make us dinner, pasta okay?" he asked standing up ready to go.

"Sounds good." she replied relieved that he apparently agreed with her and didn't put up a fight over staying at the precinct. It seemed as if he wanted to forget about his conversation with Crystal Brooks as soon as possible.

"Okay, I've got to go now. I love you." he said and leaned in to kiss her. Then he was out the door determined to at least not fail when it came to supporting her with her father's addiction. And so he concentrated only on this one thing he still could turn for the better.

* * *

As he entered the loft he still couldn't get it out of his mind. Alexis was nowhere to be seen which unnerved him a little. But when he found the note on the kitchen counter saying that his daughter was just spending sometime with a friend studying for this big exam and that a security detail was with her he calmed down and within seconds his train of thoughts was back. Was his assumption even right? Did Jim Beckett actually have a relapse and was drinking again? He had to because what else would lead him to a bar certainly not a glass of soda.

But tomorrow Castle would know for sure, it would be saturday, the day Kate and her father were planning on meeting. He had something to tell her, she had told Castle. That didn't sound good, did it? If Castle was right, and he was sure he was, Kate would most definitely need someone to lean on. Even though she was a kick-ass detective and pretty much in control of her emotions she wouldn't get through this on her own and she wouldn't have to, Castle would make sure of it. So just like he had thought at the precinct an hour earlier he still thought it was probably best if he was prepared for what the meeting with her dad would mean for Kate. And exactly that was the reason why he was pacing through the loft now, iPhone at his ear and hoping Jim Beckett would pick up.

"Rick?" he heard the man on the other end ask surprised.

"Jim, hey..." he answered slowly now unsure whether it had been such a good idea to call him. The two men hadn't talked that much since Castle and Kate were in a relationship and actually Rick only had Jim's number in his phone in case something happened to Kate. So had calling him really been the right thing to do?

"Has something happened to Katie?" he asked afraid of what the answer might be, immediately concerned about his daughter's well-being.

"No, Kate's fine... I just called because..." god this was really harder to say that he had thought. "Well I don't know how to put this... She told me you two were planning on meeting tomorrow and..." how was he supposed to ask her dad if he was drinking again? This wasn't exactly something you would ask him directly, was it?

"Thank god she's okay, you know you had me worrying for a moment." he said relieved and completely oblivious to Castle struggling with the words he desperately needed to get out there. "So Katie told you we're meeting tomorrow. I haven't seen her in a while and... Well there's something I need to tell her..." it seemed to be hard for him to think about what he planned on telling his daughter when they met.

"She mentioned that and that's actually why I wanted to talk to you..." Castle told him hesitantly as he stopped pacing around the loft and sank down on one of the chairs in his living room.

"How comes that?" apparently Jim Beckett had no idea what Castle wanted to talk about. Hadn't he seen him in front of the bar? "What I'm going to ask you might sound... I guess it might make me sound like a total jerk but I need to know because I care about her and I don't want her to get hurt. But if it's unavoidable I... She'll need someone to be there for her and I guess it's only fair if I can prepare for it..." he started rambling trying to get it over with as soon as possible but to Kate's father he didn't make any sense.

"What is this about Rick? How... Did someone tell you about..." he sounded remorseful like he now had an idea what this all was about. Something was definitely gnawing at his conscience.

"I saw you... At the bar..." Rick replied simply.

"And you..." Jim quietly said but didn't finish the sentence.

"I just knew..." and he had wished it wasn't like it seemed. But how could he misinterpret the situation? "But I didn't tell her..."

"Thank you... I think she should hear it from me..." he sighed heavily, this wasn't the conversation he had ever pictured to have with the writer his daughter was in love with.

"I agree." he had the urge to yell at Jim, to make him realize what he was doing to Kate. But he stopped himself by taking several deep breaths. Yelling wouldn't make this situation any better.

"But how? How did you just know when you saw me?" he didn't seem to understand it although to Castle the question seemed to be totally superfluous.

"Why else would you go to a bar than to drink?" he asked angrily. Did this man think he was an idiot?

"Wait... Did you... You think I'm drinking again?" he asked shocked. It seemed that he had been talking about something entirely different the whole time.

"Yes. Why, isn't that the truth?" Jim's reaction suddenly made Castle unsure whether his assumption was right. Maybe he became obsessed with the idea of Kate's father having a relapse.

"No! I'm sober, I haven't had a drink in years. God I wish that would be what I need to tell Katie... At least I would know that she'll overcome it with time, she already did so once and she was alone back then. Now that she has you, I'm sure she would be able to deal with an alcoholic as a father..." he was almost laughing because he was that relieved but soon fell silent.

"Then what is it?" Castle didn't understand anything anymore.

"It's worse..." Kate's father whispered, desperation shining through in his voice.

"What could be worse than... Oh god you didn't kill someone, did you?" his eyes grew wide as he thought about the possibility of Jim Beckett being a killer.

"No! Hell no, I'm a lawyer I..." he exclaimed shocked at how Rick could think something like that. "I wouldn't do that to someone... And their family..." he grew quiet thinking about that day in early January when his world had been shattered.

"I'm sorry... I know you wouldn't... You..." he stuttered amazed by how big of a jerk he could make of himself within a few seconds. What had he thought? Of course Jim Beckett wouldn't kill someone, Jim Beckett knew exactly what it meant to loose a loved one. God, how would he ever be able to look his girlfriend's father in the eyes again?

"I've got a daughter..." Jim interrupted his rambling.

"I know... Kate. You're her dad, you wouldn't do something to hurt her like that..." again he was rambling.

"No, you don't understand. I've got a daughter... Another one..." it wasn't easy to admit it to his daughter's boyfriend but having thrown it out there was much more of a relief than he had thought it would be.

* * *

**Somewhat of a cliffhanger here but I know some of you already suspected this. I'd love to hear your thoughts, so review :)**


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